Saturday, June 15, 2013
Bug's Bleat - - GCF: American Idol
My dad, James Curtis McClellan about 1949.
"Bug Eaters" Da Boys ate Crickets and Mealy Worms at LoGoLy Day Camp.
LifeNet preparing to transport a patient from MRMC.
This years "Flower Bed" in the Magnolia Gardens.
Annette studying for her sermon at Wade Prison Monday.
Shelling fresh Pinto Beans.
James Watson (Tamey) Duke with David on the steam engine that once set in the park east of Lewisville.
Volume 15, Issue 24 Friday, June 14, 2013
Hello ALL,
It’s been a GREAT week with our two youngest grandsons here to attend LoGoLy State Park Day Camp [http://www.arkansasstateparks.com/events/discovery-day-camp-session-ii-85759/#.UbuKr9jp-BI]. It’s a change of our routine (i.e. Up at the crack of mid morning, preparing breakfast for two little locust (well, having McDonald’s prepare it when we oversleep.) Getting them to McNeil with their lunches and binoculars and “Willies” (to wear in the mud), etc.) But, it’s worth it having two fantastic kids around the house.
Now, if we can just survive until their dad gets here to pick them up … then it will be nap time till about Sunday morning.
~~~~~
Earlier I referred to Da Boys as being locust. Knowing this description to be relatively accurate, we prepared for their visit by stocking extra food for them. We brought in enough food to feed the four of us for the entire week and not require that we eat out (except when we overslept and had to go by McDonalds for breakfast.)
As it turned out, we had a Drs Appointment in Little Rock Monday so Jimmy took them to LoGoLy that day and dropped them off again at the park Tuesday morning. We picked them up from the park that afternoon, so they didn’t come over till Tuesday afternoon. As a consequence we didn’t have them eating at our home as many days as we’d planned for.
Grandparent will completely understand the following true statement.
We had to go back to the grocery store after the boys left for the Park Wednesday morning, because our cupboards were bare.
~~~~~
When Annette and I got married, I was surprised that “our” grocery bill was about 400% higher than “my” grocery bill had been. This was especially puzzling since we were in that first phase of marriage where you don’t want to be caught using the bathroom, much less eating a lot. In fact, Annette would let me eat as much as I desired each evening. (At least she did until she realized that she was facing death by starvation unless she started getting some food before I cleaned out every food container on the table.)
So, I couldn’t figure out why we were spending so much money on groceries since we were basically eating the same types of meals that I had been preparing as a bachelor (with the exception that Annette did cook “cleaner” than I did. For instance, she didn’t throw spaghetti on the wall to see if it was done.) Finally, we started spending less at the grocery store every two weeks. And I got up the courage to ask Annette why we’d been spending so much previously. She explained that her mother had never let her cook and the only way she knew to learn was “trial and error.” Her method consisted of cooking meals until she had one that was eatable. The previous attempts each day ended up in the apartment trash bin.
Hindsight being 20/20, maybe it would have been cheaper to enroll her in cooking school. On the other hand, I doubt any regular school I could have afforded could have turned out a cook as accomplished as her trial and error method did.
~~~~~
Speaking of seeing the doctor Monday, got a pretty good report from Dr. Mendelsohn. My "weird" blood seems to be moving toward more normal readings for the first time since he started treating me in 1987. It's still weird, just not as much so. He thinks I may be growing a replacement spleen. It's unusual but he's seen it in a few cases and he told me; "you're just weird enough to be doing it." Also ... since I'm no longer having to take EPO, I'm no longer ineligible for the Olympics (because I was taking a banned performance enhancing drug.) :-) God Is Good.
~~~~~
Cheap Chinese Cocoanuts - - This week we decided to expand our pantry with some Coconut Milk. Annette picked up a couple of cans at Sam’s and “we” tried some. Annette went first and experimented with a little Coconut milk “straight up.” She commented that it wasn’t exactly a pleasant experience. So, I decided to put a little in my coffee. … The result was, well, less than satisfying.
So, the coconut milk sat in the frig for a day or so when Jimmy dropped the boys off for a visit. We were having a good time when Vanessa came by to pick them up. But first, she went into the “office” to visit with her mother. While there, she called for the boys to please bring her a glass of milk.
Now Vanessa loves Dairy and usually has a Big Tea Glass full of cold milk when she partakes.
A light went off in the prank section of my brain and I told Josiah and Ethan that we had some “special” milk for their mom. I got out the jar of coconut milk, filled up a glass and gave it to Josiah for delivery to his mom.
By this time, both boys had tumbled to the fact that a prank of some type was in the works. Josiah did a magnificent job of delivering the glass to his mom with a straight face while Ethan and I huddled in the kitchen, waiting.
We didn’t have to wait long. Vanessa took a very healthy drink of what she thought was regular skim milk and had swallowed a significant amount before realizing that something was wrong, very wrong. Her exclamations, sputtering and general distress resulted in loud laughs from the boys who immediately ratted me out as the creator of this prank.
~
When I related this story to Keith Burton, I also commented that it was a mystery to me how folks could brag about Coconut milk when it’s taste was so far from what we classified as good. He told me that fresh coconut milk was good and the problem with this product was probably due to it being from “Cheap Chinese Coconuts.” He’s probably right.
~~~~~
This week I heard that it’s everyone’s “right” to have dental and health insurance. I wish we’d known that when we were first married. That was back in the day that we had to save up for a year to go to the drive-in movie on “Dollar Night.”
When Annette found out she was pregnant with Vanessa (though in those days you didn’t know the sex or much else about the baby until they were born,) we had insurance but it didn’t cover pregnancy (such coverage would have more than doubled our monthly premiums.) So … she cut a deal with Dr. Ruff to “Lay Away” this pregnancy. In exchange for regular weekly payments to the doctor and hospital we got Annette’s regular “Prenatal” exams as well as the hospital delivery.
Of course, her “deal” only covered routine pregnancy costs. Any complications or extras would be billed to us separately.
So you can understand how nervous I was getting after she’d been in hard labor, at the hospital for over 20 hours. If she went over a day in the labor room, we’d be billed for the second day.
Fortunately, in spite of our new baby being a “breech” delivery, she delivered Vanessa Anne McClellan 23 hours and 45 minutes after being admitted. At least that’s what they told me. I had passed out at about the 23 hour and 35 minute mark, as they were moving her into the delivery room.
~~~~~
I was fortunate to have a father, a step father, numerous uncles (and cousins) and our Heavenly Father to raise me. My father, James Curtis McClellan, worked in the oil field seven days a week but still found time to show his love to me. Even though he died when I was only four, I have several memories:
Sitting on the friendly bar counter eating peanuts while my dad had a beer (and had the riot act read to him when my mom found out he’d taken her son to a “den of inequity.”)
Standing on a hill east of where big green earth movers were building the earthen dam to form Lake Earling.
Playing in the cab of a road grader that was parked in a field (the current location of the Taylor Post office) across the street from our house in Taylor.
Waiting in the car with my mom for my dad to shut the rig down so I could scurry up the tall stair case to get my reward (a dollar) for daring to challenge the big noisy beast that was a hard working oil drilling rig.
Sitting in my dad’s lap, watching the late movie on Chanel 12 (one of the two channels we got at that time.)
Waking up in my bed in Taylor after going to sleep on a pallet at my Aunt Jerry and Uncle Paul’s house. My dad had missed me and driven to Bussey to get me in the middle of the night.
~
My stepdad, James Watson Duke” also worked seven days a week, in the Chatterbox restaurant where he fed many of the oil field workers.
His generosity to me began when my mother was working for him and we still lived with my grandmother in Taylor.
He made a sizable donation to the Boys Club so I could become a charter member even though I didn’t live in Magnolia.
He also got me a library card at the Magnolia Library so I could get books there instead of waiting on the red and white bookmobile to come to Taylor.
He taught me to cook a hamburger (don’t squeeze the meat and only flip it once and, of course, toast the bun on the grill. Take the meat and the bun off at the same time and put the cheese on the meat to let it melt “naturally.”)
He taught me to serve the public efficiently with a smile and without complaint unless their sin was too great and to then prosecute them to the fullest extent of the law.
He introduced me to the Texas Eagle, the Missouri Pacific passenger train running from San Antonio to Chicago which we rode to St. Louis every year to see the Cardinals play and to Chicago and New York to National Restaurant Shows when he was a vice-president of that association.
While traveling, he took us to the best restaurants (where we all had to order something different so we could all taste a wide range of recipes and that’s the reason to this day I break out in a cold sweat if any two people in my party order the same thing.)
He took us to Broadway shows (i.e. Destry Rides Again, Camelot, Sound of Music, South Pacific, The Music Man, etc.)
And, when Annette and I married, he included my family in his care for me.
~~~~~
In spite of what we think, we are really never truly alone. Most of us have family, friends, co workers, neighbors, etc. who actually do care about us. I know it’s not “in vogue” but it truly does take a village to raise a child. And it takes a village to maintain a life, even after we’re grown. We’re human and American and that means that we instinctively look out for each other.
Of course, I don’t have any empirical facts for this. Just my own observations and experiences. A couple stand out;
After my dad passed away, my mother became the “Do Gooder” of Taylor, Arkansas. If someone needed to be taken to the hospital, she loaded them up and we took them. If someone didn’t come home, we went to Springhill, found them, sobered them up (she held the coffee and I held the tomato juice) and brought them home.
And growing up on Hearn Street in Taylor, my cousins and I were cared for by our parents, Aunts, Uncles, neighbors, the local shop keepers, police, etc. In fact, years later my cousin Polly would share just how secure she felt growing up cared for by the community. Some coworkers were discussing how emotionally hard and psychologically scarring their child hoods had been. When they looked to Polly to commensurate with them she had to say that growing up on Hearn Street in Taylor, AR she never knew of abuse or fear.
We were watching an Anthology “Garrison Keillor: The Man on the Radio in the Red Shoes” today. I really like “A Prairie Home Companion” and I like Garrison Keillor. Even though he’s what us fundamentalist conservatives call a “Flaming Liberal.” I wanted to share a bit of one of his monologs that I believe explains why most of us have more in common than we have in difference.
~
“… the public school was one of those places. In Anoka, Minnesota some children wound up going to Dartmouth or Stanford or Carlton or Princeton but they spent their formative years in the public schools with the children of farmers, and carpenters and cops and firemen. They all rode together on the big yellow school bus and they cheered for the teams and ate macaroni and cheese in the lunchroom, a valuable experience that gives you a tribal feeling.
Minnesota is a place where if you ask an audience to stand up and sing, they’re gonna do it. They were brought up to. Like the Star Spangled Banner, which like our system of government, is much maligned and badly abused but if you put it in the right key, which is the key of G, it works pretty well and it’s very moving.
People get so much of their politics listening to other people rant and rave on the radio, sitting alone in their car or reading somebody’s blog, and the Star Spangled Banner is one of those rare moments when we sing a song together, which means more for all of us joining in. We share a common tongue and a fondness for jokes, a love of American landscape and we are a union.”
~~~~~
A friend of ours asked; “Somebody answer my question, please....Why would Edward Snowden have to stand trial for exposing "illegal" acts done to American citizens, by our government?”
I have VERY strong mixed feelings. On the one hand, I'm glad that this program (which we all assumed the NSA was doing) was publicly "called out." On the other hand, this man set himself up as judge, jury, etc. and opened up our intelligence operations to the world. What really disturbs me is that he "fled" to China to escape prosecution. Do the Chinese now have everything he had about our intelligence capabilities? They say not. Who believes that?????
HWP commented: “I can agree with you James, this is a very questionable area and We The People need a long discussion and debate regarding this issue. (We actually should've had it a long time ago. In our gut we've known it had to be going on, just didn't want to believe it!)”
I think Benjamin Franklin said it best: "Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a little Temporary Safety deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."
~
I've felt this way since the Uniting (and) Strengthening America (by) Providing Appropriate Tools Required (to) Intercept (and) Obstruct Terrorism Act of 2001 was passed.
~~~~~
Listen to the oppressed crowd.
Enjoy their joy.
Those were the days before that Tuesday morning.
Those were the days before those neocon lies.
Those were the days before Barack Obama droned civilians to death with his Terror Tuesday meetings.
Those were the days when drones were male honey bees.
Listen to the crowd.
"Born in the U.S.A."
Behind the Berlin Wall.
Victims challenging the communist security police officers spying on their prey.
"Born in the U.S.A!"
Back then, America was the spiritual beacon of hope, instead of the marauding crusader of change she is in our post-9/11 world.
Those were the days.
And, now, somewhere out there, a Russian, French, Indian, Japanese, South Korea, Latin American, Australian, or maybe even a North Korean young artist, is composing the next "Born in the U.S.A."
But will he or she be as welcome in America to perform as Bruce Springsteen was welcome behind the Berlin Wall in 1988? ...
[http://open.salon.com/blog/danielkronlid/2013/06/14/does_that_star-spangled_banner_still_wave]
~~~~~
“When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you until it seems that you cannot hold on for a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time when the tide will turn.” - Harriet Beecher Stowe, born June 14, 1811
~
Today in History, Jun 14,
1642 - 1st compulsory education law in America passed by Massachusetts
1775 - US Army founded
1777: Congress adopts the Stars and Stripes replacing Grand Union flag
1917 – 1st German air attack on England, 100+ killed in East-London
1940 - Auschwitz concentration camp opens (3 million killed there)
1942 - Anne Frank begins her diary
1944 - 1st B-29 raid against mainland Japan
1951 - 1st commercial computer, UNIVAC 1, enters service at Census Bureau
1954 - Pres Eisenhower signs order adding words "under God" to the Pledge
1959 – Disneyland Monorail System, the first daily operating monorail system in the Western Hemisphere, opens to the public in Anaheim, California.
1963 - Valery Bykovsky in Vostok 5 orbits earth 81 times in 5 days
1984 - Southern Baptist convention decide on no women clergy members
2012 - The world's first stem-cell assisted vein transplant is undertaken by Swedish doctors on a 10 year old girl
~~~~~
Arkansas Governor Mike Beebe has ordered that the United States and Arkansas flags be flown at half-staff Saturday, June 15, to honor United States Army Specialist Robert Allan Pierce of Huntington, who died June 3, while serving his country in Afghanistan.
~~~~~
My young classmate, Martha Chapman, shared this with us. Her comment; “This is so true- what to do- what to do-”
~
The Terrible Tragedy of the Healthy Eater - - August 1, 2012 by Erica •
“I know you. We have a lot in common. You have been doing some reading and now you are pretty sure everything in the grocery store and your kitchen cupboards is going to kill you. …”
For the rest of the EXCELLENT article, go to; 1http://www.nwedible.com/2012/08/tragedy-healthy-eater.html
~~~~~
As a big fan of photography and trains, I was excited to learn of the work of Gary Knapp on "Tracks Ahead" this week. He's doing incredible work with trains in iconic settings at night. [http://www.ourherald.com/news/2010-11-18/Front_Page/f05.html] To see more Gary Knapp work just Google “gary knapp night trains”. [http://www.railpictures.net/showphotos.php?userid=7962]
~~~~~
The news of fatal explosions at two south Louisiana Manufacturing Plants this week could cause us to conclude that working in a chemical plant is a dangerous occupation, but statistics say otherwise.
There were 25 fatalities in chemical manufacturing plants nationwide in 2011, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. That's a fatality rate of 1.9 per 100,000 full-time workers, barely half the rate among all workers.
Nationwide, 3.8 of every 100 full-time workers was injured in 2011, according to the U.S. Occupational Safety and Health Administration. The injury rate was 2.4 in the overall chemical manufacturing sector, and 0.6 in the area of chemical manufacturing including the Williams plant. That's among the very lowest injury rate of any manufacturing sector.
Don’t get me wrong, any fatalities are way way too many ... but the fact that two explosions resulted in such a low number of fatal injuries is a testament to the plant and community emergency plans and teams. The reports from these incidents reveal a great deal of planning for and a professional job of responding to these incidents
~~~~~
Latest Posting in "Praying For Melinda"
Jodi is at family camp this week so I will do my own updating. She will straighten me out if she thinks I didn't do it right I am sure. Wayne and I just got in from Houston. I didn't show out this time. lol. Everything went well. Now that I am not eligible for the trial anymore (since I reacted to one of the drugs-cetuximab) the plan is still to continue on with the other two, Avastin and Torisel (this is the one that has to be paid for out of pocket).I will have two more weeks of treatment then they will do scans to see if the treatment is doing any good without the third drug. We are on Plan B now, I don't know how many more plans the doctors can come up with but I still have faith God has a plan of His own. I appreciate all the prayers, support, and donations
(https://www.giveforward.com/fundraiser/jcf2/healing-for-melinda?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=fb_share_stream.share&utm_campaign=vanity_page_T1&og_action=hug&t=3&fb_ref=1052547)
Words are just not enough but that is all I have. God bless you all.
~~~~~
John and Teresa Britton are Chi Alpha Campus Ministries Missionaries in Stillwater, OK. If you have a giving heart, I recommend supporting this Mission. They do a great job spiritually feeding college students and ... they also do a great job helping college students with their physical needs.
When they were at SAU in Magnolia I often saw them inviting students to their home, and helping students with just about any problem you can imagine college students encounter. John and Teresa also are very hard workers in the local church. We're really missing them in Magnolia since they moved to OK.
John Britton - - Check out our page at AG U.S. Missions web site: http://usmissions.ag.org/resources/locator_02.cfm?Display=Yes&churchdetail=AGHM4015
~~~~~
Every New Christian (and most older ones) should attend a Discipleship school like "In Christ" Bible School that MCC used to sponsor.
This is a GREAT way for young Christians who they are "In Christ." The curriculum is simple but very very deep.
1. Someone to be responsible (notice I didn't say subservient) to.
2. An education in who we are In Christ.
We graduated many folks from MCCs "In Christ" Bible school over the years. I wish it was still holding classes.
~~~~~
Magnolia's Farmers Market. Opens at 7:00 am. Usually sold out by 8 to 8:30 am. Tuesdays and Thursdays And Saturday
Emerson Farmers Market at the Emerson United Methodist Church. Is open Tuesdays and Fridays. 7 am till... (usually 8 or 8:30)
~~~~~
Favorite Quotes:
A lot of people criticize the primaries, but I think they are absolutely essential to the education of the President of the United States.
I've had at least my share of tragedy, but I have had far more than my share of happiness.
Believe me, as one who has seen a number of international crises firsthand, they cannot be handled without an understanding of history.
A lot of people criticize the primaries, but I think they are absolutely essential to the education of the President of the United States.
Pierre Salinger
~
You don't have to hit bottom for God to show you His way. But it's easier to see what's really going on when you have no where to look but up.
James F. McClellan
~~~~~
The following wisdom is shared by our friends.
~
Focus on individuals—avoid the herding. Jesus went searching for the one.
We become focused on the BIG picture (the forest) and we lose sight of the trees (individuals). Ministry is not ONLY about the BIG picture, it is also – and most specifically – about the individual. Disciples are not created in herds. Disciples are created as individuals (Great Commission)
Taken from Brian Dollar's blog--Kid's minister
Mary Louise Brownlee Alexis
~
Be prepared when you pull your refrigerator out from the wall- you will NOT like what you see!
Martha Chapman
~
The moon smiling down on me tonight doesn't affect me that much. It's when it points at me and laughs that I get mad.
If your job is to tell me how to do my job, you should at least know how to do my job.
The Obama administration would NEVER use the NSA's electronic intelligence schemes to garner information for political gain. I mean, it's not like the NSA is the State Department, the Justice Department, the FBI, or the IRS for Pete's sake.
Chuck Jackson
~
Don't escape from your long preparation, see!! we what easy and fast, pop out like popcorn what if it will take 30 years for preparation will You stay In? , "Preaching to myself".
Titus Kasomo
~
I think the heat has zapped all my energy today
Today, take the time to look around you, and recognize what you have to be thankful for. Now do you really think YOU did all that by yourself?
Never let a day go by without telling your loved ones how important they are to you. None of us are promised tomorrow.
Nancee Davis Law
~
The presence of outstanding strengths presupposes that energy needed in other areas has been channeled away from them. -Allen Shawn
Why is it that missionaries are applauded for speaking the language of and using the best of their host culture to express the Gospel, but if an American church does the same thing we are "watering down the gospel"? Jesus is coming. Let's win this generation!
Jimmy Malone
~
The best part about being over 40 is we did most of our stupid stuff before the internet!
Bobbie McClellan
~
Wake up Wake Up America! .... Cause it's gonna be a great day!!!!
Anita Heath McNatt
~
You know how when your parents would leave, they'd give 1000 instructions? I Thess. 5 reminds me of that. Here's a few of those instructions. Live in peace with each other, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient, do good, rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks...the list goes on. You know, focusing on these each day, and making it our business to be about the Father's business, we'd be too busy to mind other folks' business...just a happy "Friday" thought!
Debbie Troquille
~
"One ship sails East, And another West, by the self-same winds that blow.’Tis the set of the sails And not the gales, that tells the way we go. Like the winds of the sea are the waves of time, as we journey along through life. 'Tis the set of the soul, that determines the goal, and not the calm or the strife." Shared from Richard Remington
Paul David Troquille
~
If you've left a voice mail on my cell phone in the last two weeks, and I didn't call back, sorry about that. I got ALL those messages at once - today.
Joe Tudor
~
Great day in Honduras today--last day of OBS with EIM. Many lives were changed, including mine! God showed out once again!
Tim Wooley
~~~~~
AskBob - - Bob Rankin - - Geekly Update - 12 June 2013
Is the Verizon 'Share Everything' plan really a secret deal to let the Feds snoop into your phone records? Is Motorola's new wearable tech a digital convenience, or the Mark of the Beast? And how many calories are in that avocado, anyway? Get answers to these burning questions, and the scoop on the latest tech news, in this edition of the Geekly Update. It's guaranteed to make you 146% smarter, read on...http://askbobrankin.com/geekly_update_12_june_2013.html?awt_l=HZr.N&awt_m=IzrcKtl.Z8P6SL
~~~~~
ACC SmartBrief - - Sen. Murkowski sees Senate taking up energy-efficiency bill soon
The Senate could begin tackling the Shaheen-Portman energy-efficiency bill after wrapping up debates on immigration policy, said Sen. Lisa Murkowski, R-Alaska. "What we need to do is nail down the universe of amendments that we can present [and] basically have a game plan to go forward," Murkowski said. "Call me optimistic, because A, it's good legislation, B, it's bipartisan, and C, it's just the right thing to do to advance energy legislation. It's long overdue." FuelFix.com (6/12) http://fuelfix.com/blog/2013/06/12/murkowski-energy-efficiency-bill-will-advance-on-capitol-hill/
~~~~~
DarynKagan.com - - I have for you today empowered actresses, a lesson in love, & kids getting perspective on what's important.
Enjoy!
-Daryn.
Over-40 Actresses Getting Some Sweet Revenge In Hollywood #Rewriting The Rules!
http://darynkagan.com/Celebs___Artists.html
Unusual Place For Marriage Proposal #Motion Approved!
http://darynkagan.com/Love_Stories.html
Dad Fights Spoiled Kids; Teens Make 33,000 Burritos!
http://darynkagan.com/Charity.html
Know anyone who would love to get this newsletter and brighten their day? Sign them up http://darynkagan.us6.list-manage1.com/subscribe?u=8fc852c2879912f2f334bb010&id=54f94ca479.
~~~~~
Diabetes Life - - www.dlife.com - - Weight Loss Surgery Series: Before, During, and After
Beginning the journey to bariatric surgery - - kalimah bioBy Kalimah Johnson
I have had a weight problem all of my life. Actually, my horrible eating habits — which contributed to my overall weight gain — http://www.dlife.com/diabetes-food-and-fitness/weight_management/weight_loss_surgery/kalimah_johnson/bariatric_surgery_part1?utm_source=Update-20130614&utm_medium=eNewsletter&utm_content=Update-newsletter&utm_campaign=dLife-eNewsletter&
~~~~~
5 Things New Veterans Expect From All Candidates
1. Defend the New GI Bill
2. Employ the New Greatest Generation
3. Prevent suicide among troops and veterans
4. Build a truly 21st Century VA
5. Improve Care for Female Veterans
http://iava.org/blog/5-things-new-veterans-expect-all-candidates-2012
~~~~~
The latest from Michael Yon, the foremost “milnews” blogger on the web.
~
Greetings,
Of interest on China and Okinawa.
Sentiment Builds in China to Press Claim for Okinawa
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/14/world/asia/sentiment-builds-in-china-to-press-claim-for-okinawa.html?ref=world&_r=0
Very Respectfully,
Michael Yon
Your Writer,
Please remember that this website accepts no advertisement and is dependent on your support.
PS Please sign up for my Twitter.com updates at "Michael_Yon" [http://twitter.com/Michael_Yon] (not Michael Yon).
http://www.facebook.com/#/MichaelYonFanPage?ref=sgm
~
www.michaelyon-online.com
~
Http://www.michaelyon_online.com/index.php
~~~~~
If you would like to encourage US Troops overseas, but are not sure just how to begin, visit www.anysoldier.com for ideas.
~~~~~
Please remember ... America is not at war. The U.S. Military is at war. America is at the MALL.
~~~~~
Rasmussin Reports - - June 14, 2013 - - Issue: 56
Distrust of Government Is What It's All About - - A Commentary By Scott Rasmussen
Another week, another controversy in official Washington.
At the moment, 35 percent of voters consider recently exposed National Security Agency surveillance efforts as the most serious. The Internal Revenue Service's targeting of conservatives is No. 2 on the list, followed by concerns about the Obama administration's handling of the incident in Benghazi last fall in which the U.S. ambassador to Libya was murdered. The Justice Department's secret probe of reporters' phone and email records is seen as the top concern by only 9 percent.
Competing for attention with the controversies are ongoing policy disputes over immigration, gun control and full implementation of the national health care law.
While each of these stories has its own cast of characters and internal dynamics, it is now possible to identify a unifying theme.
President Obama, whose deeply held faith in government is unwavering, unintentionally provided that moment of clarity last week. In attempting to dismiss concerns about the NSA disclosures, he said, "If people can't trust not only the executive branch but also don't trust Congress and don't trust federal judges to make sure that we're abiding by the Constitution with due process and rule of law, then we're going to have some problems here."
We have a problem.
Just 30 percent of voters nationwide have that much trust in government officials when it comes to these surveillance efforts.
Only 24 percent now are confident that the federal government does the right thing most of the time.
This popular distrust of government is the theme that ties all the recent news stories together. It's driving all the current policy debates.
On immigration, there is broad popular support for comprehensive immigration reform. Most Americans believe legal immigration is good for the country, but most do not trust the government to enforce any provisions in the new law that would improve border security and reduce illegal immigration. Only 7 percent believe that enforcement is "very likely" to happen.
This is not just Republicans grumbling about Barack Obama in the White House. The same skepticism was there when George W. Bush was president. Unless the government does something to address the border problem, it will be there for the next president, as well. Because of that distrust, prospects for passing serious immigration reform this year are slim indeed.
Similarly with gun control, Americans overwhelmingly like the idea of requiring background checks for those who want to purchase a gun, but they are very suspicious of where the president and New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg want to go from there. If voters were convinced their plan was for background checks and nothing more, it would have enjoyed broad popular support.
The president's health care law is facing the same challenge. New mandates will soon force people to buy more expensive insurance plans. Advocates say they're not really more expensive because they provide more coverage. But most Americans are uncomfortable with trusting the government to decide an appropriate level of coverage. They're also suspicious of all government cost estimates.
Many in Washington are frustrated by the public distrust. They dream of public relations programs to overcome it. What is needed, though, is for the government to change its behavior, so that it can earn the trust of the people it serves.
To find out more about Scott Rasmussen, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com.
COPYRIGHT 2013 - - SCOTT RASMUSSEN - - DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM
See Other Political Commentaries. http://www.rasmussenreports.com/public_content/political_commentary
See Other Commentaries by Scott Rasmussen. http://www.rasmussenreports.com/public_content/political_commentary/commentary_by_scott_rasmussen
~~~~~
"Today's Seed" from E-MIN - June 14, 2013
Today's message is an encore presentation of the Today's Seed message that was sent 14 years ago today, June 14, 1999.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Jesus said to the people who believed in him, "You are truly my disciples if you keep obeying my teachings. And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." "But we are descendants of Abraham," they said. "We have never been slaves to anyone on earth.
What do you mean, 'set free'?" Jesus replied, "I assure you that everyone who sins is a slave of sin. A slave is not a permanent member of the family, but a son is part of the family forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will indeed be free. (John 8:31-36 NLT)
Prayer: LORD, I am grateful that I have a place in the family of God that will not be taken away from me. No other person or creature can take it from me and You will not: You have made me Your child forever. I no longer have to be a slave to sin or anything else, but I am free in You. Thank You for making this freedom possible. Help me learn more of the Truth and what this means as I grow in You. In Jesus' name. Amen.
________________________________
Today's Seed is reader-supported. Please help us grow. Donate by check, card, & PayPal: www.e-min.org/give2.htm (Tax deductible)
Sign up to receive your own Today's Seed: www.e-min.org/msg.htm - -Share Today's Seed with family & friends: www.e-min.org/rects.htm Connect with Randall: www.facebook.com/RandallVaughnBooks or www.twitter.com/randallvaughn Get Randall's new book: My Lyrics, My Life https://www.createspace.com/4092337
Today's Seed by Randall Vaughn is published daily (M-F) by E-MIN Global Ministries, P O Box 220, Warrior, AL 35180 (USA) www.e-min.org Copyright Terms/Permissions/List Privacy www.e-min.org/tp.htm Today's Seed(TM) (c) 2012 Randall Vaughn All Rights Reserved Worldwide.
~~~~~
http://www.shelfari.com
http://www.shelfari.com/bugsbleat/shelf
~~~~~
Photos on the front of this week’s “Bleat” include - - My dad, James Curtis McClellan about 1949. "Bug Eaters" Da Boys ate Crickets and Mealy Worms at LoGoLy Day Camp. LifeNet preparing to transport a patient from MRMC. This year’s "Flower Bed" in the Magnolia Gardens. Annette studying for her sermon at Wade Prison Monday. Shelling fresh Pinto Beans. James Watson (Tamey) Duke with David on the steam engine that once set in the park east of Lewisville.
~~~~~
For the latest issue of "Da Bleat.", go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com.
Our photos are posted at http://www.bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
Thank You, Dad
Reflections on my Father
By: Chuck Colson
Hi, I’m John Stonestreet. As we get ready to buy our dads a tie for Father’s Day, let’s hear from our old friend Chuck Colson, who in this 2008 broadcast reflected on his dad.
As this Father’s Day approaches, I’ve been thinking a lot about my own dad, and how blessed I was to have him in my life. I was born during the Depression; by today’s standards, I guess you’d say we grew up in fairly deprived circumstances. I just didn’t know it.
I remember that Dad wasn't around much when I was growing up. He had to drop out of high school when he was a young man to support his family after his father died. So by the time I arrived, he was working full-time at a job, and going to accounting school—and later law school—at night—12 years in total.
One of my earliest childhood memories was my parents taking food to neighbors who had less than we did; and my mother taking me on the subway to meet my dad coming out of law school at nine o’clock at night. Then we’d accompany him home, but not before stopping for an ice cream.
As I reflect on it, I think I developed my work ethic during those days. When I got out of the Marine Corps, I thought nothing about working full-time and going to school four years at night to get my law degree. After all, my dad had set the example. Maybe one of the best days for my dad, and for me, was when I was admitted to the bar in Massachusetts and made a copy of the certificate, mailing it to my dad with a note on it saying, “Without you I could never have done this.”
My dad worked so hard that I was accustomed to only spending time with him on Sunday afternoons. We'd sit on the back porch, and there was never any wasted time. My dad would drill lessons into my head: Always do an honest day’s work for an honest day’s pay; be willing to do anything you’re required to do (that came in handy, by the way, when I had to clean toilets in Marine training); and always tell the truth. Well, I testified 44 times under oath during Watergate, and was never once accused of perjury.
But if anybody accused me of self-righteousness, I would have to stand convicted. When I got to the White House, I was meticulous about avoiding conflicts of interest: I’d put everything I owned in trusts. I wouldn't see former clients. But I ended up in prison. Self-righteousness is a form of pride.
One of the toughest things I ever experienced was stopping by my dad’s hospital room on my way to prison. It was an emotional time, but at least I was able to witness to him about Christ. I won’t know until I get to heaven what came of it. And my worst day followed that, when I learned, in prison, that my dad had died. I had to attend the funeral under armed guard.
But one thing I knew for sure—and I knew it even as I grieved at my father’s funeral: Dad had poured everything he had into me—and into his grandkids, who became the joy of his life. And he lived his life with great honor and dignity.
All I can hope is that the same will be said of me some day by my children and grandchildren. I knew every minute my dad was proud of me—and I was proud of him.
I told him how I felt many times when he was alive. But on reflection, I wish I’d told him more often. So, don’t miss the opportunity this Father’s Day to tell your father how much you love him and appreciate him. Or, if he's gone, as my father is, at least give a prayer of thanks to God that you had the dad you did.
(This commentary is re-aired from June 13, 2008).
Further Reading and Information
Take action Thank You, Dad: Reflections on my Father - Next Steps
On this Father’s Day, pick up the phone, mail a card, thank your dad for the time he devoted to you. In instances where relationships are strained, take the first step to reconcile with your father even in small ways like simply sending a quick note and breaking the silence. Where communication is completely cut off, pray for your father.
If you get a chance, check out the book The Blessing by Gary Smalley and John Trent about how to improve broken family relationships and heal any past wounds with your father. Find other great books on fatherhood listed below.
Books:
The Blessing
Gary Smalley | Pocket Books | November 1990
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=0671737430
First Time Dad: The Stuff You Really Need to Know
John Fuller | Moody Publishers | May 2011
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=9780802487506
You Have What It Takes: What Every Father Needs to Know
John Eldredge | Nelson Books | March 2007
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=0785288767
Point Man: How a Man Can Lead His Family
Steve Farrar | Multnomah Publishers | April 2003
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=1590521269
Quiet Strength: The Principles, Practices, and Priorities of a Winning Life
Tony Dungy | Tyndale House | May 2008
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=1414318022
Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: 10 Secrets Every Father Should Know
Meg Meeker |Regnery Publishing | September 2006
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=1596980125
Tales from the Dad Side: Misadventures in Fatherhood
Steve Doocy | Harper Paperback | 2008
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=9780061441639
What Every Man Wishes His Father Had Told Him
Byron Forrest Yawn | Harvest House Publishers | February 2012
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=9780736946384
[http://www.breakpoint.org/bpcommentaries]
Copyright © 2013 Colson Center. All Rights Reserved
~~~~~
Residents of Columbia County, Arkansas are represented in Congress by:
~
Senator John Boozman (R_ AR)
1 Russell Courtyard
Washington DC, 20510
Phone: 202-224-4843
http://boozman.senate.gov/
~
Senator Mark Pryor (D_ AR)
Phone 202_224_2353
FAX 202_228_0908
http://pryor.senate.gov/
~
Representative Tom Cotton (R )
Phone 202_225_3772
FAX 202_225_1314
http://cotton.house.gov/
Other states congresspersons can be found at: [http://www.visi.com/juan/congress/]
~~~~~
THOUGHT OF THE DAY:
"Live a balanced life. Learn some and think some, and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some." - Robert Fulghum
"If I'd known I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself!" - Eubie Blake
"How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives." - Annie Dillard
"Fair winds and following seas and long may your big jib draw!" - Naval Blessing
"Anger as soon as fed is dead / 'Tis starving makes it fat." - Emily Dickinson
"The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them." - Mark Twain
"There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." - Oscar Wilde
~~~~~
Breaking Christian News
Patriots' Owner: Tebow Was Signed on Because of His "Spirituality"
News Staff (Jun 13, 2013)
Patriots' owner Robert Kraft announced that Tim Tebow was signed on recently, in part, because Kraft was concerned about a lack of spirituality on his football team.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=11797
~
30th Abortion Clinic CLOSED in 2013, after Botched Abortions, Patient Death
Operation Rescue News Staff (Jun 10, 2013)
"Nova will be closing due to the dogged determination of a core of local activists who pursued every available opportunity—from prayer to public protest—to expose this heinous abortion mill and protect the public from its dangerous practices." –Troy Newman
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=11755
editor@breakingchristiannews.com
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
GCF: If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: American Idol
My wife left me a note saying I should try out for "American Idle."
But the joke is on her because she spelled it wr--- hey, wait a minute!
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: New Boyfriend
The teenage girl brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. He has a baseball cap on backwards, torn low-rider jeans and numerous tattoos and body piercings.
The mother pulls her daughter aside. "Dear, you know your father and I love you and we only want the best for you. This boy, he just doesn't seem very ... nice."
"Oh please, Mom! If he wasn't nice, why would he be doing five hundred hours of community service?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Job Requirement
The personnel manager was impressing the applicant with the prospective job.
"We make parts for microscopes. You'll be required to work with lenses that are ten-thousandths of an inch thick."
"I can handle it," the applicant said, "I used to slice meat in a delicatessen."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Workaholic
As an attorney in a major law firm, I have many colleagues who work long hours. However, the reputation of one of my partners' workaholic ways even extended beyond the office. He not only had to leave work early one day because of a medical problem, but was also told by his doctor to stay home until the end of the week. My colleague grudgingly agreed to comply.
In the middle of the week, our receptionist received a call for him. She announced that the partner was out of the office until Friday.
"Good," the caller said. "That's all I wanted to know." It was the partner's doctor.
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: How Many Children?
I was blessed with three beautiful, intelligent and terrific children. When they were seven, six and five, my youngest daughter who was always asking questions, came home from kindergarten one day and asked, "Daddy, how many children did you want?"
Thinking for a minute, I looked at her and said, "Two."
She thought about this for a moment and then asked, "Me, and who else?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Delivery Suspicion
There was an unexpected knock on my door, and like I always do I first opened the peephole and asked, "Who's there?"
"Parcel Post, ma'am. I have a package that needs a signature."
"Where's the package?" I asked suspiciously. The deliveryman held it up.
"Could I see some ID?" I said, still not convinced.
"Lady," he replied wearily, "if I wanted to break into your house, I'd probably just use these." And he pulled out the keys I had left in the door.
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Better Living Through Chemistry
Table of Elements:
C = carbon
Ho = holmium
Co = cobalt
La = lanthanum
Te = tellurium
CHoCoLaTe - Better living through chemistry!
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Nasty Virus
One week of suffering through a nasty stomach virus left me wiped out. But I found a silver lining the very first day I could crawl out of bed.
Throwing on a pair of pants, I called out to my husband, "Look! These jeans fit, they finally fit!"
"Great," he said. "But those are mine."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: What's Wrong, Officer?
"What's wrong, Officer?"
I asked the cop those three dreaded words seconds after he'd pulled me over.
"Didn't you notice that you were driving the wrong way down a one-way street?" he asked.
"No" I said. "I'd turned on from Maple, which didn't have any signs indicating that this street was one-way."
"That's because you were going the wrong way down Maple too."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Black Friday Shopping
My wife got mad at me when I told her I was "NOT" going shopping with her at midnight on Black Friday. She went by herself, and she informed me in the morning that she had purchased eight new dresses.
"Eight dresses!" I hollered, "What could any woman want with eight new dresses?"
She calmly replied, "Eight new pairs of shoes."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Oregon Trail
On a family vacation one summer, we crossed Wyoming and noted several historical points of interest. The children were especially interested because they enjoyed the computer game "Oregon Trail," which gives players a taste of the hardships the pioneers endured.
We stopped at the famous South Pass to look at the wagon tracks still visible in the dirt.
Squinting out over the desolate, wind-swept landscape, my daughter nodded and said grimly, "This is where my oxen always die."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Soccer Carpool
For the second time in a row, I was forced to impose on the woman with whom I carpooled to our children's soccer practices. I phoned and explained that my husband had the car again, so I wouldn't be able to take my turn. A few minutes before she was due to pick up my son, my husband showed up.
Since it was too late for me to call and say I could drive after all, I asked my husband to hide the car in the garage and to stay inside. I also explained to my son that he shouldn't mention anything about his father's whereabouts.
Unfortunately, my husband forgot and was in front of our house chatting with a friend when my carpool partner arrived. When my son returned from practice, I asked him if she had noticed.
"Yes," he replied, "she asked me which of the two men in front of the house was my father. But don't worry. I told her I didn't know."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Heimlich Maneuver
During a CPR training class, we were paired up to practice the Heimlich Maneuver. The instructor set the scene by saying, "Imagine you're at a dinner party with your spouse and he or she starts choking."
He then reminded us not to do anything to people who were coughing, because they'd probably dislodge the obstruction on their own. We were to calm such victims with quiet talk and encourage them to continue coughing.
When the role playing began, one woman moved close to her coughing "husband." She placed a hand on his shoulder and whispered, "Honey, did you remember to mail your life insurance premium check last week?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Eating Habits
The mother had become very cholesterol-conscious and was trying to change the family's eating habits. They were now consuming lots of oat bran, and she had substituted turkey for most of the meats they used to enjoy. She used ground turkey in spaghetti sauce and she served turkey hot dogs.
The 18-year-old daughter was getting tired of all the turkey and cholesterol talk. One day she came home from school and asked the usual, "What's for dinner?"
"Chicken," the mom replied.
With a tired sigh she inquired, "Real chicken or turkey chicken?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Ice Capades
A mother's four-year-old daughter was attending her first performance of the Ice Capades. She was so mesmerized that she wouldn't budge from her seat even during intermission, watching the activity while the ice was cleaned.
At the end of the show, she exclaimed, "I know what I want to be when I grow up!"
The mother envisioned her on the ice in another 15 years, starring in the Ice Capades.
She was brought back to earth when the daughter continued, "I want to be a zamboni driver!"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Birthday Cake
The mother was having difficulty gulping down the birthday cake her young son had made for her as a surprise.
When she was finished, he happily exclaimed, "I'm so glad you like it, Mommy. There should have been 32 candles on the cake, but they were all gone when I took it out of the oven."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Chain Necklace
When a thief snatched a chain necklace that a friend of mine was wearing, she grabbed at his collar, trying unsuccessfully to stop his getaway. Asked for the thief's description later, she said,"Don't bother looking for him. He only got a costume-jewelry chain of mine. But when I grabbed him by the collar, I got his chain, and it's real gold!"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Need to Relax
Jill wanted to convince Susan, a continually harried friend, that she needed to find ways to relax. She invited her to dinner and, while she was busy cooking, Susan agreed to watch her old videotape on stress management and relaxation techniques.
Fifteen minutes later, she came into the kitchen and handed Jill the tape. "It was good," she said, "but I don't need it."
"But it's a 70-minute video," Jill replied. "You couldn't have watched the whole thing."
"Yes, I did," Susan assured her. "I put it on fast-forward."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Missing Purse
One Saturday night some friends came to our house to play cards. As they were driving away at the end of the evening, I discovered that one of the women had left her purse in a corner next to the dining-room hutch. I was about to call her house, intending to leave a message on the answering machine, when my son reminded me that they had a cell phone.
As I dialed the number, I marveled at the technology that would alert them before they had driven all the way home. A few seconds later the purse began to ring.
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Traffic Court
Recently in Traffic Court, a man who received an expensive parking ticket, testified that a uniformed Policeman had given his OK for the man to park there.
The Judge asked the man if he would recognize the Officer if he ever saw him again, and the man replied that he would.
The Judge then said, "Good. When you see the Officer again, tell him he owes you 257 dollars. Next..."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Tickets
A police officer friend of ours had stopped at the local cafe for coffee and was getting ready to leave when I spotted him.
"Go out and get'em!" I said. "I suppose everyone gets a ticket today?"
"I don't really give out many tickets," he said seriously.
"Oh come on," I teased, "you'd give your own mother a ticket."
"No, my mother never drove a car," he said, still serious.
Then a grin spread over his face. "I did catch her jaywalking once." he said, "and I issued her a warning. But that's all."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Diet Tips
My sisters and I have weight problems and are always sharing diet tips. One day my oldest sister was showing us a low-fat cookbook and pointed out a chicken dish she had tried the night before.
Reading the ingredients, I commented, "It looks like it would taste really bland."
"It did," she replied, "until I added cheese and sour cream."
_ _______________________________ _
/ )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( \
/ / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ \
_( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_
(((\ \>|_/ )_____________________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Xylophataquieopiaphobia: \ / \ _/ the fear of not pronouncing \_ / / / words correctly. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )_____________________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / Does the Alphabet Song and \ \_/ //// \ / Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star \ / \ _/ have the same tune? \_ / / / Why did you just try singing the two \ \ songs above? (They are the same tune, and it was written by Mozart) (((\ \>|_/ )_____________________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / Yogurt is one of only three \ \_/ //// \ / foods that taste \ / \ _/ the way they sound. \_ / / / The other two are goulash and squid. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )_____________________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Some days you are the bug. \ / \ _/ Some days you are the windshield. \_ / / / \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / There's a fine line between \ / \ _/ fishing and standing on \_ / / / the shore looking like an idiot. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Your cat does love you! \ / \ _/ It's just hidden beneath \_ / / / a veil of contempt. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / Some people can tell what \ \_/ //// \ / time it is by looking at the \ / \ _/ sun, but I have never been \_ / / / able to make out the numbers. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / For every action, there is an \ / \ _/ equal and opposite criticism. \_ / / / \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / What do you do when \ \_/ //// \ / you see an endangered \ / \ _/ animal that is eating an \_ / / / endangered plant? \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / When someone annoys you, it \ \_/ //// \ / takes 42 muscles to frown, but \ / \ _/ it only takes 4 muscles to extend \_ / / / your arm and whack them in the head. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Junk: stuff we throw away. \ / \ _/ \_ / / / Stuff: junk we keep. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / If a parsley farmer is sued, \ / \ _/ can they garnish his wages? \_ / / / \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Someday, we may discover how \ / \ _/ to make a magnet that \_ / / / can point in all directions. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / If a book about failures \ / \ _/ doesn't sell, \_ / / / is it a success? \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Why do they lock gas station \ / \ _/ bathrooms? Are they afraid \_ / / / someone may clean them? \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Why does flammable and \ / \ _/ inflammable mean the same thing? \_ / / / \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / I assume full responsibility \ / \ _/ for my actions, except the ones \_ / / / that are someone else's fault. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Sometimes when you cast your \ / \ _/ bread upon the waters \_ / / / all you get back is wet bread. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Back up my hard drive? \ / \ _/ How do I put it in reverse? \_ / / / \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / I'm not into working out. \ / \ _/ My philosophy is \_ / / / "No pain, no pain." \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / With Congress, every time they \ / \ _/ make a joke it's a law, \_ / / / and every time they \ \ make a law it's a joke. (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Don't take life too seriously...\ / \ _/ it's not permanent. \_ / / / \ \\ _ _______________________________ _ / )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( \ / / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ \ _( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
On the way back from a cub scout meeting, my grandson innocently said to my son, "Dad, I know babies come from mommies' tummies, but how do they get there in the first place?"
After my son hemmed and hawed a while, my grandson finally spoke up in disgust, "You don't have to make up something, Dad. It's okay if you don't know the answer."
Received from Penny Bartnicki.
(_:][:_)
Where's My Smith And Wesson
You may have heard on the news about a southern California man put under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100 guns and allegedly had (by rough estimate) 1-million rounds of ammunition stored in his home. The house also featured a secret escape tunnel.
My favorite quote from the dimwit television reporter: "Wow! He has about a million machine gun bullets." The headline referred to it as a "massive weapons cache."
By southern California standards someone even owning 100,000 rounds would be called "mentally unstable." Just imagine if he lived elsewhere:
In Arizona, he'd be called "an avid gun collector."
In Arkansas, he'd be called "a novice gun collector."
In Utah, he'd be called "moderately well prepared," but they'd probably reserve judgment until they made sure that he had a corresponding quantity of stored food.
In Montana, he'd be called "The neighborhood 'Go-To' guy."
In Idaho, he'd be called "a likely gubernatorial candidate."
In Wyoming, he'd be called "an eligible bachelor."
And, in Texas, he'd be called "a deer hunting buddy."
Received from dadiodio.
(_:][:_)
An older man, not in the best physical condition, asked the trainer in the gym, "I want to impress a beautiful young girl. Which machine should I use?"
The trainer replied, "Use the ATM machine outside!"
Received from george kotalis.
(_:][:_)
Which Came First?
A computer scientist, a surgeon, and a civil engineer were gathered at the pub. The surgeon boasts, "Surgery is the oldest technology in the world. It's in the Bible. God removed Adam's rib while he slept. This is clear evidence that surgery pre-dates all other technological endevors."
Without so much as a beat, the civil engineer says, "Before that, God formed the earth, the stars, and everything from nothing but chaos. He created rivers, mountians and oceans. This was clear evidence that civil engineering pre-dates all other technological endeavors."
No to be outdone, the computer scientist points out, "Yes, but where do you think the chaos came from?"
Received from ArcaMax Jokes.
(_:][:_)
The congregation of a small stone church decided that the stone which formed the step up to the front door had become too worn by its years of use, and would have to be replaced. As a sign of the faithfulness of members over the years, the stone had a pronounced dip in the middle, well-worn by parishioners entering and leaving the chapel.
Unfortunately, there were hardly any funds available for the replacement. Then someone came up with the bright idea that the replacement could be postponed for many years by simply turning the block of stone over.
They discovered that their great-grandparents had beaten them to it.
Received from Da Mouse Tracks.
(_:][:_)
My husband and I had just finished tucking our five young ones into bed one evening when we heard sobbing coming from three-year-old Billy's room. Rushing to his side, we found him crying hysterically. He had accidentally swallowed a penny and was sure he was going to die. No amount of talking could change his mind.
Desperate to calm him, my husband palmed a penny that he happened to have in his pocket and pretended to pull it from Billy's ear. Billy was delighted. In a flash, he snatched it from my husband's hand, swallowed it and demanded cheerfully, "Do it again, Dad!"
Received from Thomas Ellsworth.
(_:][:_)
Company B of the 11th Airborne Division stationed in Germany was sent on a two-day march. The weather was cold and rainy, and the roads soon turned to mud. The battalion commander, a colonel, marched with the troops, first with one group and then another.
On this moonless night, most of the men didn't recognize the colonel with his rain gear on and military insignia covered up. One miserable private leaned toward him and said, "Can you believe some idiots actually make a career out of this?"
From Reader's Digest, "Humor in Uniform"
Received from Ed.
(_:][:_)
Ann Landers challenged her readers to come up with the world's third biggest lie -- right after "The check is in the mail" and "I'm from the government, and I'm here to help you." Here is a sampling from the thousands she received:
- "It's a good thing you came in today. We only have two more in stock."
- "Five pounds is nothing on a person of your height."
- "You made it yourself? I never would have guessed."
- "You don't look a day over 40."
- "Dad, I need to move out of the dorm into an apartment of my own so I can have some peace and quiet when I study."
- "It's delicious, but I can't eat another bite."
- "The new ownership won't affect you. The company will remain the same."
- "The puppy won't be any trouble, Mom. I promise I'll take care of it myself."
- "Your hair looks just fine."
- "Put away the map. I know exactly how to get there."
- "You don't need it in writing. You have my personal guarantee."
Received from Ed.
(_:][:_)
A woman went into a hardware store to purchase a bale of peat moss.
She gave a personal check in payment and said to the clerk, "I suppose you will want some identification."
He replied, without hesitation, "No ma'am, that won't be necessary."
"How come?" asked the woman.
"Crooks don't buy peat moss," answered the clerk.
(_:][:_)
A friend was lecturing in Latin America. He was going to use a translator, but to identify with his audience, he wanted to begin his talk by saying in Spanish, "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen." He arrived at the auditorium a little early and realized he did not know the Spanish words for ladies and gentlemen. Being rather resourceful, he went to the part of the building where the restrooms were, looked at the signs on the two doors, and memorized those two words.
When the audience arrived and he was introduced, he stood up and said in Spanish, "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen."
The audience was shocked. He didn't know whether he had offended them or perhaps they hadn't heard him or understood him. So he decided to repeat it. Again in Spanish he said, "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen."
One person in the audience began to snicker. Pretty soon the entire audience was laughing. Finally, someone told him that he had said, "Good evening, bathrooms and broom closets!"
Received from Clean Laffs.
(_:][:_)
After spending 3-1/2 hours enduring the long lines, surly clerks and insane regulations at the Department of Motor Vehicles, I stopped at a toy store to pick up a gift for my son.
I brought my selection - a baseball bat - to the cash register.
"Cash or charge?" the clerk asked.
"Cash," I snapped. Then apologizing for my rudeness, I explained, "I've spent the afternoon at the motor-vehicle bureau."
"Shall I giftwrap the bat?" the clerk asked sweetly. "Or are you going back there?"
Received from Thomas Ellsworth.
(_:][:_)
--
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Column - -
http://www.madkane.com/humor_blog/
Facebook Faces The Hashtag Music
June 14th, 2013
Facebook Faces The #Hashtag Music (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Facebook honchos have fin’ly said “yes”
To #hashtags, but under duress:
All the cool kids at Twitter
Treat hashtags like glitter,
A trend Facebook dares not transgress.
#Facebookhashtag #Facebookhashtags #hashtagsfacebook #hashtagfacebook
© Madeleine Begun Kane. All Rights Reserved.
http://www.madkane.com/
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Once upon a time a powerful Emperor of the Rising Sun advertised for a new Chief Samurai.
After a year, only three applied for the job:
A Japanese,
A Chinese, and
A Jewish Samurai.
"Demonstrate your skills!" commanded the Emperor.
The Japanese samurai stepped forward, opened a tiny box and released a fly. He drew his samurai sword and *Swish!* the fly fell to the floor, neatly divided in two!
"What a feat!" said the Emperor. “Number Two Samurai, show me what you do."
The Chinese samurai smiled confidently, stepped forward and opened a tiny box, releasing a fly. He drew his samurai sword and * Swish! * Swish! * The fly fell to the floor neatly quartered.
"That is skill!" nodded the Emperor. "How are you going to top that, Number three Samurai?"
The Jewish samurai, Obi-wan Cohen, stepped forward and opened a tiny box releasing one fly, drew his samurai sword and *Swoooooosh! * flourished his sword so mightily that a gust of wind blew through the room. But the fly was still buzzing around!
In disappointment, the Emperor said, "What kind of skill is that? The fly isn't even dead."
"Dead?" replied the Jewish Samurai... "Dead is easy. Circumcision... Now THAT takes skill!"
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"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." __ Franklin D. Roosevelt
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. _ _ George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" _ _ Queen E. Watson
“A political class of Republicans and Democrats that look after themselves, not the Nation. A media hostile to the very precepts of this nation. A generation of Americans who see morals as vices, and are ignorant of America's Actual History.”
"The things that will destroy America are prosperity-at-any-price, peace-at-any-price, safety-first instead of duty-first, the love of soft living, and the get-rich-quick theory of life." - - Theodore Roosevelt
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234_5655
(Non _ Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance _ 234_7371 (24 Hour)
Jail _ 234_5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control _ 800_222_1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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Interested in getting in touch with the Banner_News through e_mail? editor@bannernews.net For the editor, news@bannernews.net For news and sports items, Coming Events, Diary, Church News, school and civic events. [http://www.bannernews.net/]
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"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." __ "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" __ "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." __ "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." _ _ "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." _ _ Paul Troquille
“Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est.” Knowledge is power. _ Francis Bacon
"The problem is here and now. The time for talk is past. The time for action is now."
Comments on the first Earth Day _ James F. McClellan via John "Fuzzy" Thurman
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" __"Bug"
God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT_I KC5HII
P. S. If you'd like to be added to the distribution, just drop us E_mail at kc5hii@suddenlink.net
. We offer "Da Bleat" as text, a "Blog" and as a newsletter with pictures in Word and PDF format. The latest issue is usually updated sometime Saturday. For the latest issue, go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com. We also have a site [http://bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com/] where we post photos that I like.
We appreciate your encouragement. We also appreciate your communication when you desire to be taken off our mail list. If you are on this mail list by mistake or do not wish to receive "Da Bleat," please reply back and tell us to discontinue service to you.
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Sunday, June 9, 2013
Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Geology Degree
Volume 15, Issue 23 Friday, June 07, 2013
Josiah & Ethan help put up the sign after MCCs Spaghetti supper.

Debra took this photo of me at the AR-1 DMAT meeting June 1 in Little Rock.

Annette's Lilies still look good after the storm.

I'm not sure exactly what's planted here but it reminds me of the "Invasion Of The Body Snatchers" movie.

Her baskets and wall plantings make an easy photograph.

This afternoon, the view from our eastern neighbor's home toward our northern neighbor's home was very relaxing.

Hello ALL,
School’s out and we’re getting more time with our youngest grandsons. Some kids might be a problem on a rainy, stormy day but Josiah and Ethan kept busy, playing (or playing with) dominos, reading (Ethan’s working on setting the Springhill Library record for number of books read. Josiah has moved away from “that kid stuff” to reading Tolkien, etc.) doing crafts (Mamaw always keeps a few craft kits handy for just such a day.) And, if we really get desperate, they can dip into the DVD vault for some TV time (but we prefer they use their time more constructively whenever possible.)
~~~~~
While Da Boys were working on their crafts Thursday, Ethan looked over at me and said; "Why don't you and mamaw ever argue when we're here?"
Annette immediately replied; “Well, there's nothing to get angry about when y'all are here and besides, we've already pretty much argued about everything there is to argue about."
He thought a moment and then said; "Makes sense. Anyone as old as y'all probably ran out of things to get mad about a long time ago."
~~~~~
What's the worst thing that can happen to a book addict? Having your daughter take a summer job at the Springhill, LA library.
She came by and made a list of my favorite authors and now she stops at the house weekly with a pile of books for me to read. I can't refuse them so I have to work hard reading every spare moment in order to be ready when the next shipment arrives.
I think I've overdosed and it's only a couple of weeks into summer.
~~~~~
Since I’ve been battling Congestive Heart Failure, Annette has become the “Salt Sheriff” of our home. Now, we cut way back on salt usage years ago. A box of salt lasts us years and one of our biggest complaints on eating out is that they often use too much salt in the cooking. We don’t even have a salt shaker on the table (which dinner guests often notice before anything else.)
But, we still get plenty of salt from processed foods and the meals we eat out. In fact, those two sources probably exceed the recommended daily sodium limits for most adults. So Annette has begun a rigorous review of all foods in the home as well as any that may be brought in from “afar.”
We’ve both learned to look at Fat, Fiber, Carb and Sodium content on any prepared foods we purchase. And the numbers will surprise you. So called “health” foods are often packed with Sodium and Carbs.
So today she was looking at my shopping list and I had “dried” chicken noodle soup on it (Lipton Soup Secrets, Noodle Soup with “Real” Chicken Broth). She was not pleased, just because one serving contains a measly 670 mg of sodium. I mean, this is less than half of the recommended daily sodium intake of 1,500 mg. and not even a third of the “Tolerable Upper Intake Level of 2,300 mg. as set by the Centers of Disease Control. Besides, I told her, “I only use this soup when I have an upset stomach.”
To which she replied; “We have fresh chicken broth in the freezer you can use for that.”
“Chicken Broth!” “That’s not going to keep my blood sugar from bottoming out!”
“O.K.” she said. “I’ll throw a noodle in it.”
There’s enough “Heart” in her for both of us.
~~~~~
My Classmate Chuck Jackson is the absolute King of Dry Wit. As you can see below.
~
Must have been a mite peckish seeing as I just finished off a plate of cold fries with no salt, no catsup, and absolutely no qualms. Running at more than forty dollars a dozen here in Santiago, I can seldom afford having qualms when I eat anyway, and never at home. Say we go to mass, though - without a couple of qualms to cut my appetite, so to speak, why, I'd like as not drain the communion cup. Worse at protestant communion services as I have a tremendous weakness for concord grape juice. Near fell in love under a concord grape arbor once. 'Course that was just puppy stuff - stepped in lots of it over the years. If you're wearing work shoes, you have to have a pocket knife and a water hose to get it out of the treads. Even so, two times out of five you get it on your finger. Once on the finger, it finds it way to your ear, and you just end up with a big mess.
~
You'd be hard put to find anyone over twelve who didn't know the words to at least seventy or eighty songs. Me? My rote memory is so bad that I know the first verse to two (2), Happy Birthday to You and the Star Spangled Banner. But that never stopped me from singing; I've always made up any lines I couldn't rightly remember. When I go to church and there's no hymnal nearby on the pew, I just sing right out anyway. After that first hymn, there'll be three or four people handing me their hymnals and the preacher and choir looking on to make sure I get one.
~~~~~
If we didn't have enough things to terrify us (i.e. Susan Rice being appointed National Security Adviser, Samantha Power stepping up to U.S. ambassador to the United Nations, over 300 drone killings to date, seizing news media emails, NSA monitoring ALL our phone calls, etc. etc.) now clowns are hiding in the woods!
Russell Brasel writes; "I've run across various sorts of snakes, gators, and seen fresh evidence of bears while hiking, but this might be the only thing that would cause me to drop my pack and run."
This clown mannequin was reportedly placed on a hiking trail deep in the Oleta River in Aventura, Florida by a park employee who got it from the Enchanted Forest Elaine Gordon Park in North Miami.
If you went hiking through Oleta River in Aventura Florida last year, you probably had to change your pants a couple miles in. (imgur.com)
~~~~~
I guess there are only so many events folks can remember. But Thursday (June 6) there was nothing in the paper, nothing that I saw on the evening news. ... It's a crying shame. Especially since most everyone knows of someone who took part in the battle. For instance, a few years ago, while visiting a grave at the Shiloh Cemetery outside of Lamartine, I noticed a head stone that read;
"Lloyd J. Burchfield
Arkansas
Pvt 456 PRCHT FA BN
82 ABN Div
World War II
Sep. 15, 1921 - Jun. 6, 1944"


That's the 456th Parachute Field Artillery Battalion whose first combat jump was in Sicily on the evening of July 9, 1943, in support of the 82nd Airborne Division's 505th Parachute Infantry Regiment. The battalion's primary mission was to fire at enemy troops and tanks utilizing a high arc, or indirect fire. During the intense Battle of Biazza Ridge, however, the battery had scored its first victory against enemy tanks using direct fire.
Following the Sicilian campaign, Batteries C and D remained with the 82nd Airborne Division and transferred to England to prepare for the invasion of France transferring the 456th PFAB designation to the European Theater.
The mission of the 82d Airborne Division on D-Day was to: "Land by parachute and glider before and after dawn astride the MERDERET River, seize, clear and secure the general area: CR (261938) - CR (265958) - CR (269975) - RJ (274982) - RJ (283992) - Bridge (308987) - NEUVILLE AU PLAIN (340985) - BANDIENVILLE (360987) within its zone; capture ST. MERE EGLISE (349965); seize and secure the crossings of the MERDERET River at (315957) and (321930), and a bridgehead covering them, with MLR along the general line: CR (261938) - CR (265953) - CR (269975) - RJ (274982) - RJ (283992); seize and destroy the crossing of the DOUVE River at BEUZEVILLE LA BASTILLE (309911) and ETIENVILLE (also known as PONT L'ABBE) (269927); protect the northwest flank of VII Corps within the Division zone; and be prepared to advance west on Corps order to the line of the DOUVE north of its junction with the PRAIRIES MARECAGEUSES."
This Force was commanded by Brigadier General JAMES M. GAVIN, assistant Division Commander, and was to be committed before dawn of D-Day with the gliders containing the 456th artillery, following the main body of paratroopers and began landing at 0404 hours. The gliders encountered fog and flak and they were scattered, and many of them were damaged upon crashing into the small fields and high hedgerows.
Enemy reaction to the landing of the 82d Airborne Division in the NORMANDY area was prompt and severe. Pvt Burchfield is listed on the Battalion's "Role Of Honor" as being killed in action June 6, 1944 in Normandy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkrqLoQXbpo
~~~~~
The U.S. Space Launch System, or SLS, will provide an entirely new capability for human exploration beyond Earth orbit. It also will back up commercial and international partner transportation services to the International Space Station. Designed to be flexible for crew or cargo missions, the SLS will be safe, affordable, and sustainable, to continue America's journey of discovery from the unique vantage point of space. The SLS will take astronauts farther into space than ever before, while engaging the U.S. aerospace workforce here at home.
The Initial 70-metric-ton SLS will stand 321 feet tall, provide 8.4 million pounds of thrust at liftoff, weigh 5.5 million pounds and carry 154,000 pounds of payload.

The massive 130-Metric-Ton Evolved Rocket Development configuration will be the most capable, powerful launch vehicle in history. Towering a staggering 384 feet tall, it will provide 9.2 million pounds of thrust at liftoff and weigh 6.5 million pounds. It will be able to carry payloads weighing 286,000 pounds to orbit. This configuration will use the same core stage, with four RS-25 engines, as the 70-metric-ton SLS.
http://www.nasa.gov/exploration/systems/sls/
http://www.nasa.gov/pdf/664158main_sls_fs_master.pdf
~~~~~
Also from Waneta [NOTE: I’ve edited out the name of the murder and victim in this story]
~
An “animal” shot and killed an innocent person in Georgia last March.
The killer is not a member of the NRA.
He did not use an assault rifle.
He did not get his stolen pistol from a gun show.
He did not attend Christian school, nor was he home schooled.
He did attend multicultural public education, and was not instructed in the Ten Commandments.
He already has a record for violent crimes.
He is gang member.
He never earned his hunter safety card, nor did he shoot CMP, Junior NRA, or 4H Air Rifle Competitions.
He was never instructed in gun safety from his father or grandfather.
He smokes weed.
While he has no job, nor was he looking for one, he is well fed, and does not need a job. He has no skills outside of crime.
He is not capable of doing a professional job interview, even though he spent 11 years in public education.
And as a side note...........
Today I swung my front door wide open and placed my Remington 870 right in the doorway.
I gave it 5 shells, then left it alone and went about my business.
While I was gone, the mailman delivered my mail, the neighbor boy across the street mowed the yard, a girl walked her dog down the street, and quite a few cars stopped at the stop sign just down from my house.
After about an hour, I checked on the gun. It was still sitting there, right where I had left it. It hadn't moved itself outside. It certainly hadn't killed anyone, even with the numerous opportunities it had been presented to do so. In fact, it hadn't even loaded itself.
Well you can imagine my surprise, with all the media hype about how dangerous guns are and how they kill people.
Either the media is wrong, and it's the misuse of guns by PEOPLE that kills people, or I'm in possession of the laziest gun in the world.
Alright, well I'm off to check on my spoons. I hear they're making people fat.
~~~~~
I remember my grandmother (Mrs. Mary Taylor) and my “mammy” (Mrs. Ida Mustifield) washing clothes this way using the wash pot in the back yard.
~
"Warshing" Clothes Recipe -- Imagine having a recipe for this! Years ago, an Alabama grandmother gave the new bride the following recipe exactly as written and found in an old scrapbook with spelling errors and all. (NOTE: For non-Southerners - wrench means rinse.)
WARSHING CLOTHES
Build fire in backyard to heat kettle of rain water.
Set tubs so smoke won’t blow in eyes if wind is pert.
Shave one hole cake of lie soap in boilin water.
Sort things, make 3 piles -- 1 pile white, 1 pile colored, 1 pile work britches and rags.
To make starch, stir flour in cool water to smooth, then thin down with boiling water.
Take white things, rub dirty spots on board, scrub hard, and boil, then rub colored don't boil just wrench and starch.
Take things out of kettle with broom stick handle, then wrench, and starch.
Hang old rags on fence.
Spread tea towels on grass.
Pore wrench water in flower bed.
Scrub porch with hot soapy water.
Turn tubs upside down.
Go put on clean dress, smooth hair with hair combs.
Brew cup of tea, sit, rock a spell, and count yore blessings.
~~~~~
Thanks to our friend Waneta Reardon for sharing this video with us. [http://puttinguptheflag.com/]
~~~~~
“Obama’s Arrogant Appointment”
You've got to hand it to him: President Obama's appointment of his U.N. ambassador, Susan Rice, to be his new national security advisor shows chutzpah!
Obama's administration is mired in accumulating scandals – from the Internal Revenue Service targeting his political enemies in the two years between a humiliating mid-term election drubbing and a successful re-election bid, to his attorney general's wholesale seizure of Associated Press phone records and fingering of Fox News correspondent James Rosen as a potential violator of the Espionage Act, to the public dissembling over the Benghazi attack and its fatal consequences for an American ambassador and three others.
For Obama to appoint to a White House post, exempt from Senate confirmation, a figure at the heart of one of these scandals -- the Benghazi attack – is a bold stroke. It's tempting to say that if Obama were as willing to take on America's implacable enemies overseas, like North Korea's Kim Jong Un or Iran's Islamic theocracy, as he is Congressional Republicans; perhaps we'd be having a bit more luck containing the looming nuclear-weapons-in-the-hands-of-lunatics menace that we face. ... G. Philip Hughes, U.S. News and World Report
http://www.usnews.com/opinion/blogs/g-philip-hughes/2013/06/06/obama-promoting-susan-rice-to-national-security-adviser-shows-extent-of-his-arrogance
~
While I agree with Mr. Hughes, in all fairness I have to remind my readers of a time when a Republican President did a similar thing. Ken Starr was initially appointed to investigate the suicide death of deputy White House counsel Vince Foster and the Whitewater real estate investments of Bill Clinton. The three-judge panel charged with administering the Independent Counsel Act later expanded the inquiry into numerous areas including an extramarital affair that Bill Clinton had with Monica Lewinsky. After several years of investigation (and untold millions of dollars) Starr filed the Starr Report which alleged that Bill Clinton had lied about existence of the affair during a sworn deposition.
The allegation that the President had lied (pshaw!), opened the door for the impeachment of Bill Clinton. And, after another expenditure of untold millions of dollars and who knows how many man-hours, the President was acquitted by the Senate on February 12, 1999.
What was Ken Starr’s punishment for wasting our money and time? He was appointed United States Solicitor General and served from 1989 to 1993 under President George H. W. Bush. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ken_Starr
Why do I care so much about Mr. Starr’s activities? Especially since I was no supporter of President Clinton? During Starr’s investigation, he epitomized the attitude of a Czar, using his subpoena powers to punish anyone who refused to lie for him (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Susan_McDougal) And for this, he was rewarded just as Susan Rice is being rewarded for lying to the public about the Benghazi incident so it wouldn’t adversely affect BO’s reelection bid.
Funny isn’t it. Clinton was impeached for lying and McDougal was imprisoned for not lying but the folks who really hurt the nation then and now get rewarded.
~~~~~
Rasmussin reports national polling results: 64% Say Most Members of Congress Don't Care What They Think
Voters remain convinced that Congress doesn't care what they think, and that includes the representative from their home district
~
Odds Grow Longer for Immigration Reform - - A Commentary By Scott Rasmussen
Many pundits assumed that this would be the year that comprehensive immigration reform became law. The conventional wisdom was that President Obama's re-election and his strong showing among Hispanic voters would force Republicans to go along.
Now, halfway through the year, the prospects for immigration reform have dimmed significantly.
Americans overwhelmingly feel that legal immigration is good for the country and think highly of immigrants. Seventy-six percent have a favorable view of immigrants who work hard, support their families and pursue the American Dream. Most (55 percent) still support the concept of comprehensive reform that will secure the border and legalize the status of many of those currently in the country illegally.
But they also want the system to work so that the border will be secure enough to prevent future illegal immigration.
http://www.rasmussenreports.com/public_content/political_commentary/commentary_by_scott_rasmussen/odds_grow_longer_for_immigration_reform
~~~~~
The Chicago Sun-Times laid off its entire full-time photography staff last week, including a Pulitzer Prize winner, in a move that the newspaper’s management said resulted from a need to shift toward more online video.
When questioned about the decision, the paper's management replied that they would rely on individual reporters taking photos for their stories.
I think they mistake the "Million Monkey" method of taking photos with a way to generate images that will be remembered for many decades.

Yes, with today’s proliferation of cameras on cell phones, tablets, etc. just about anyone can take a picture. But there's a big difference in taking a snapshot and knowing what to photograph, when to photograph it, how to photograph it and which photograph will work for the story.
http://www.newseum.org/exhibits-and-theaters/permanent-exhibits/pulitzer/
http://www.newseum.org/exhibits-and-theaters/permanent-exhibits/pulitzer/videos/pulitzer-prize-photos.html
~~~~~
Our classmate Chuck Jackson writes; “The U.S. Government is collecting millions of pieces of electronic data on us from telephone companies and internet services FOR OUR OWN GOOD. Trust the government. The government is our friend interested only in our safety and welfare. Trust the Justice Department, the IRS, and the State Department. These are our friends. (Our enemies must be in stitches by now.)”

Was I the only person who was disturbed by the passage of the USA PATRIOT (Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism) Act?
The Act dramatically reduced restrictions on law enforcement agencies' ability to search telephone, e-mail communications, medical, financial, and other records; eased restrictions on foreign intelligence gathering within the United States; expanded the Secretary of the Treasury’s authority to regulate financial transactions, particularly those involving foreign individuals and entities; and broadened the discretion of law enforcement.

Opponents of the law have criticized its authorization of indefinite detentions of immigrants; searches through which law enforcement officers search a home or business without the owner’s or the occupant’s permission or knowledge; the expanded use of National Security Letters, which allows the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) to search telephone, e-mail, and financial records without a court order; and the expanded access of law enforcement agencies to business records, including library and financial records. Since its passage, several legal challenges have been brought against the act, and Federal courts have ruled that a number of provisions are unconstitutional. With the latest excesses of the NSA and DOJ, I believe there will be many more court challenges. I hope they are successful in reigning in these liberty killing edicts.
I think Benjamin Franklin said it best: "Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."
~~~~~
Photos on the front of this week’s “Bleat” include - - Josiah & Ethan help put up the sign after MCCs Spaghetti supper. Debra took this photo of me at the AR-1 DMAT meeting June 1 in Little Rock. Annette's Lilies still look good after the storm. I'm not sure exactly what's planted here but it reminds me of the "Invasion Of The Body Snatchers" movie. Her baskets and wall plantings make an easy photograph. This afternoon, the view from our eastern neighbor's home toward our northern neighbor's home was very relaxing.
~~~~~
ACC SmartBrief - - acc@smartbrief.com - - Senate bill seeks easier loan qualifications for energy-efficient houses
06/7/2013 | New York Times (http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/07/business/senate-bill-sweetens-loans-for-energy-efficient-homes.html?_r=1&), The
A reintroduced Senate bill seeks to boost the buying power of people purchasing energy-efficient homes. Under the bill from Sens. Johnny Isakson, R-Ga., and Michael Bennet, D-Colo., homebuyers would qualify for larger mortgages than they normally would, provided they are using the mortgage to purchase an energy-efficient house. The bill will help promote energy-efficient home-building materials, which are usually "out of sight and out of mind and are not valued," Isakson said.
~~~~~
DarynKagan.com - - Where's Daryn?
So what up with the lack of new content? Why no daily newsletter from me?
I have a great excuse--I'm on a belated honeymoon with my new husband. We got married back in September, but with schedules, kids, and jobs and such, now seemed the best time to go.
I never was one to invest in order, anyway.
The Husband has whisked me away to a far away land and the most gorgeous beaches I've ever seen.
We're back next week and I promise pictures and of course, lots more uplifting and positive news!
So stay tuned!
~~~~~
Pea-Shirt artist Elizabeth Birchfield, a recent SAU graduate in Graphic Design (left) and festival chairman Ellie Baker show the 2013 PurpleHull Pea Festival Pea-Shirt. You can see Elizabeth's portfolio at: http://www.behance.net/elizabeth_birchfield
— with Ellie Mullins Baker at Emerson, Arkansas.

Supplemental to the Pea-Shirt. The "Small Town, Big Tillers" tank, and the "Peas Please Me" shirt, are available at Emerson Food Mart and Emerson Farmers Market. — at Emerson, Arkansas.

The Emerson PurpleHull Pea Festival “Million Tiller Parade” starts at 1 p.m. Saturday, June 29. The World Championship Rotary Tiller Race that evening. There are two classes, stock and modified but it's the modified class that most folks come to see. (PurpleHull.com)
Most tillers are powered by 5–10hp, gasoline engines. The tillers used in the Modified class are nothing like these stock machines. They must be based on a production tiller and retain the original gearbox and chassis. Beyond that, anything goes. The engine, throttle, and tines can be modified any way you choose, as long as the engine doesn't produce more than 50 hp.
Running behind a 50hp tiller--blades a spinnin'--is, well, nuts. A race begins with the machines idling, one competitor in each lane, with referees at the opposite end of the track working a stopwatch. A starter waves a flag, and the racers go for it. They must keep their feet on the ground and hands on the bars during the race. A three-second penalty is assessed for being dragged across the finish line or exiting the lane. YouTube has some nutty videos of racers who can't keep up with their machines and eat dirt. Search "rototiller racing" and be entertained.
Read more:
http://www.hotrod.com/feature_stories/hrdp_1211_hot_rod_anything_rocket_rototiller/#ixzz2VeHvxnCH
~~~~~
Favorite Quotes:
"Discernment is God's call to intercession, never to faultfinding."
Corrie Ten Boom
~
Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured. ~ Mark Twain - - Thanks to Ron Hazelton
~
The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.
Will Rogers
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
Will Rogers
If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.
Will Rogers
~
Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.
Mark Twain
It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native criminal class except Congress.
Mark Twain
~~~~~
The following wisdom is shared by our friends.
~
Chuck Jackson
Who told? C´mon, fess up. My little secret about leaving twenty minutes before rush hour to beat the traffic is OUT! I think half of Santiago is on to it now.
Just because you're offended, doesn't mean you're right.
~
Nancee Davis Law
When God shows up, He shows out.
Life without music is like cookies without milk
God is faithful even if we are faithless.
Before you complain about how GOD treats you, you should think of how you treat GOD
God isn’t against you having nice things. He’s against nice things having you
Prayer is an open channel to God's heart.
I could definitely become a morning person...if it started later in the day.
I had a thought that I need to clean today but hopefully that thought will pass.
Your tongue can be a powerful weapon. be careful what you say.
~
Dustin McClellan
I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue are the colors of freedom until they are flashing behind you.
~
Quinton Riggins
Does the US government approve of what you have posted on FB today?
Still thinking about being a storm chaser? I'm not.
Warning!!! Men: please do not tell your wife the truth if she asks you if her clothes are looking too tight. I'll be okay. The bruises should clear up in a week or two.
~
Norma Kay Rowe
Joyce Meyer Ministries
It's our duty as Christians to forgive. God teaches us that. He did it first!
what if we woke up this morning with only the things we thanked God for yesterday. I would be in trouble for sure!!
If you want peace, then you need to be willing to make the changes required to obtain it!!!!! Joyce Meyer
~
Dalicia Torrence
" Never let another person define how you feel about you. "
-T.D. Jakes
~~~~~
AskBob - - Bob Rankin - - HELP... My Email Was Hijacked!
Category: Email
A reader asks: 'Can you please help, somehow my email account got hijacked, and now all my friends are getting spam, from me! I am always careful with my password. How could this have happened, and what should I do?'
Read more: http://askbobrankin.com/help_my_email_was_hijacked.html#ixzz2VeMkO9kH
~
Is Someone Stealing My WiFi?
Category: Wireless
Is your wireless Internet connection sometimes mysteriously slow? It's possible that you're sharing it with a stranger. But how can you know for sure if a neighbor or a malicious hacker has tapped into your wifi? Read on to learn how you can detect bandwidth bandits, and give them the boot...
Read more: http://askbobrankin.com/is_someone_stealing_my_wifi.html#ixzz2VeN89Utu
~~~~~
Diabetes Life - - www.dlife.com
Blueberry Cheese "Danish" - - Super healthy, low carb version of a decadent breakfast treat.
Prep Time: 10 minutes
Cook Time: 5 minutes
Difficulty: Easy
Nutrition Facts
Makes 2 servings
Amount Per Serving
Calories 138.7
Total Carbs 9.4 g
Dietary Fiber 2.4 g
Sugars 3.7 g
Total Fat 10.6 g
Saturated Fat 6.0 g
Unsaturated Fat 0.4 g
Potassium 54.9 mg
Protein 4.4 g
Sodium 65.0 mg
Dietary Exchanges
10.5989 Fat, 0.3515 Fruits,
Ingredients
1 tsp unsalted butter
3 tbsp cream cheese
0 1/2 cup fresh blueberries
1 piece lavash (flax, oat bran, whole wheat)
Directions
Preheat oven or toaster oven to 325°F. Wrap lavash in foil. Place on center oven rack for 10 minutes.
Remove from foil.
On warmed lavash, spread, butter, cream cheese, and top with mashed blueberries.
Slice in half, and roll into two portions. Secure with toothpicks.
Replace on foil, heat 5 minutes in oven.
http://www.dlife.com/diabetes/diabetic-recipes/reciperesults.html?recipeId=10383440&utm_source=Foodstuff-20130604&utm_medium=eNewsletter&utm_content=Foodstuff-newsletter&utm_term=Focused&utm_campaign=dLife-eNewsletter&
~~~~~
The latest from Michael Yon, the foremost “milnews” blogger on the web.
~
Greetings,
Verizon secretly ordered to turn over phone records. This has been breaking news in the UK.
Remember the Cold War when we were fighting against these things? Now we are these things.
[http://www.michaelyon-online.com/verizon-ordered-to-turn-over-records.htm]
Very Respectfully,
Michael Yon
Your Writer,
Please remember that this website accepts no advertisement and is dependent on your support.
PS Please sign up for my Twitter.com updates at "Michael_Yon" [http://twitter.com/Michael_Yon] (not Michael Yon).
http://www.facebook.com/#/MichaelYonFanPage?ref=sgm
~
www.michaelyon-online.com
~
Http://www.michaelyon_online.com/index.php
~~~~~
If you would like to encourage US Troops overseas, but are not sure just how to begin, visit www.anysoldier.com for ideas.
~~~~~
5 Things New Veterans Expect From All Candidates
1. Defend the New GI Bill
2. Employ the New Greatest Generation
3. Prevent suicide among troops and veterans
4. Build a truly 21st Century VA
5. Improve Care for Female Veterans
http://iava.org/blog/5-things-new-veterans-expect-all-candidates-2012
~~~~~
Please remember ... America is not at war. The U.S. Military is at war. America is at the MALL.
~~~~~
"Today's Seed" from E-MIN
You brought me more happiness than a rich harvest of grain and grapes. I can lie down and sleep soundly because you, LORD, will keep me safe. (Psa 4:7-8 CEV)
Sign up to receive your own Today's Seed: www.e-min.org/msg.htm - -Share Today's Seed with family & friends: www.e-min.org/rects.htm Connect with Randall: www.facebook.com/RandallVaughnBooks or www.twitter.com/randallvaughn Get Randall's new book: My Lyrics, My Life https://www.createspace.com/4092337
Today's Seed by Randall Vaughn is published daily (M-F) by E-MIN Global Ministries, P O Box 220, Warrior, AL 35180 (USA) www.e-min.org Copyright Terms/Permissions/List Privacy www.e-min.org/tp.htm Today's Seed(TM) (c) 2012 Randall Vaughn All Rights Reserved Worldwide.
~~~~~
http://www.shelfari.com
http://www.shelfari.com/bugsbleat/shelf
~~~~~
For the latest issue of "Da Bleat.", go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com.
Our photos are posted at http://www.bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
“… Christians we can’t be blind-sided by the accelerating speed at which the culture is jettisoning traditional views of sexuality. Nor should we be intimidated by the hostility we’ll face for our beliefs.”
BreakPoint - - Not that There's Anything Wrong with That - - What Is -- or Isn’t -- Homophobic
By: Eric Metaxas|
Cultural views on homosexuality are changing so rapidly, it’s hard to keep track of what is or isn’t homophobic anymore.
Eric Metaxas
In a classic episode of “Seinfeld” entitled “The Outing,” a student reporter is convinced that Jerry and George Costanza are gay. They strenuously deny being gay, while adding “not that there's anything wrong with that.”
The phrase almost immediately became part of the way Americans talk about homosexuality.
The “Seinfeld” episode came to mind while reading recently about the brouhaha concerning Roy Hibbert of the NBA’s Indiana Pacers. During a press conference, Hibbert used profanity and commented about being “stretched out” on the basketball court. And then he used the phrase “no homo.”
If you’re unfamiliar with that phrase, you’re not alone. It’s an expression from rap music asserting that “the speaker of such does not have any homosexual intent.”
If that sounds like Wikipedia, that’s because it is. I didn’t know what it meant, and I strongly suspect that 99 percent of the people in the room didn’t either. That didn’t stop news of Hibbert’s “gay slur” from becoming the biggest sports story of the weekend.
The NBA fined Hibbert $75,000, saying it was necessary to demonstrate that “such offensive comments will not be tolerated.” I think that comes out to $25,000 per syllable.
I’m not going to defend Hibbert. His profanity alone warranted a fine, and absent his “no homo” comment, I doubt that anyone would have read anything sexual into what he said.
But I can’t help but notice that what constitutes a “gay slur” is a moving target. LeBron James used the same phrase a few years back and nobody cared.
Again, I’m not defending anyone—I’m simply noting how fast the definitions of “homophobia” and “bigotry” are changing.
Take the issue of same-sex marriage. A few weeks ago, Michael Kinsley of the New Republic, commenting on the furor over Dr. Ben Carson’s opposition to same-sex marriage, rightly noted that Carson “has views on gay rights somewhat more progressive than those of the average Democratic senator ten years ago.”
In fact, Carson’s position is about the same as President Obama’s position just two years ago! Yet, Carson’s opinion is considered beyond-the-pale in many circles today.
All of this has me wondering whether a Seinfeld episode like “The Outing” could even be produced today. The phrase “not that there's anything wrong with that” was a classic because it captured the audience’s ambivalence about homosexuality: While people aspired to be “tolerant” and “open-minded,” they certainly didn’t want others thinking that they engaged in same-sex relations.
Some commentators are displaying the same ambivalence in reaction to the new HBO film on Liberace. They confess to being put off by the homosexual content—all the while feeling guilty about being put off.
If such ambivalence isn’t already branded as “homophobia,” it will be soon. The mere suggestion that there might be something wrong with same-sex relationships will be considered “homophobia.”
So why bring this up on BreakPoint? Well, as Christians we can’t be blind-sided by the accelerating speed at which the culture is jettisoning traditional views of sexuality. Nor should we be intimidated by the hostility we’ll face for our beliefs.
It may be that the culture will soon be beyond repair—that traditional views will not be tolerated. Or maybe not. But one thing’s for certain, we must, by God’s grace, hold fast to His plan for human sexuality: marriage between one man and one woman, one time, for the couple’s mutual joy and the procreation of children.
Only then will we be able to preserve—or perhaps create anew—a culture of life, goodness, health, and beauty.
And nothing is wrong with that.
~
Takeaction - Next Steps
It seems everything has become a battleground for ideology. Be aware of this when engaging in today’s cultural setting. It's important to stand up for the truth, even though conversations may be difficult and costly in this sometimes hostile environment.
Promote the culture of life, goodness, health, and beauty as Eric discussed, doing it winsomely and with grace.
Articles:
Shutting Down Free Speech [http://www.breakpoint.org/commentaries/2629-shutting-down-free-speech]
Chuck Colson | BreakPoint.org | July 25, 2007
The Coming Persecution [http://www.breakpoint.org/commentaries/2398-the-coming-persecution]
Chuck Colson | BreakPoint.org | July 1, 2008
The Thought Police [http://www.breakpoint.org/bpcommentaries/breakpoint-commentaries-search/entry/13/10733]
Chuck Colson | BreakPoint.org | May 1, 2007
When Two So-Called “Married” Women (or Men) Repent
John Piper | desiringgod.org | June 4, 2013 [http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/when-two-so-called-married-women-or-men-repent]
[http://www.breakpoint.org/bpcommentaries]
Copyright © 2013 Colson Center. All Rights Reserved
~~~~~
Residents of Columbia County, Arkansas are represented in Congress by:
~
Senator John Boozman (R_ AR)
1 Russell Courtyard
Washington DC, 20510
Phone: 202-224-4843
http://boozman.senate.gov/
~
Senator Mark Pryor (D_ AR)
Phone 202_224_2353
FAX 202_228_0908
http://pryor.senate.gov/
~
Representative Tom Cotton (R )
Phone 202_225_3772
FAX 202_225_1314
http://cotton.house.gov/
Other states congresspersons can be found at: [http://www.visi.com/juan/congress/]
~~~~~
THOUGHT OF THE DAY:
"One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and, if it were possible, speak a few reasonable words." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
"Everything should be kept as simple as possible, but no simpler." - Albert Einstein
"The reading of all good books is like a conversation with the finest men of past centuries." - Rene Descartes
"Action is the antidote to despair." - Joan Baez
"To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness." - Bertrand Russell
"No man for any considerable period can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true." - Nathaniel Hawthorne
"Live a balanced life. Learn some and think some, and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some." - Robert Fulghum
~~~~~
Breaking Christian News
Author Stephen King has revealed he believes in God, saying those that don't are ignoring creation.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=11691
Huge Breakthrough for Multiple Sclerosis Treatment “Our approach leaves the function of the normal immune system intact. That's the holy grail." -Stephen Miller
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=11736
editor@breakingchristiannews.com
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
GCF: If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Geology Degree
My parents scoffed, but I knew my college degree in geology would come in handy one day. It was during Army Basic Training in Texas and I was pulling KP duty.
When the sergeant asked me what I did in civilian life, I proudly said that I was a geologist.
"Good. I'm looking for someone with your background," he said, while dropping a bulging sack onto the table. "You've got just the right qualifications to pick the rocks out of these potatoes before you peel them."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Emergency Call
Shopping one afternoon, I was paged to come to the mall office. I rushed over and an office clerk said that I was to call home right away.
Fearing the worst, I found a pay phone. When my teenage daughter answered, I immediately asked what was wrong. "Everything's fine, Mom," she said. "But I have a date in an hour and I want to wear the shoes you have on."
_ _______________________________ _
My four-year-old likes to say the blessing at mealtimes, usually repeating the same short prayer: "Thank you, God, for this gracious food. Amen."
One evening, however, he offered thanks for the birds, the trees, each of his friends, and asked God to watch over his family and help them to be good.
I was thrilled that he was finally praying from the heart.
But after the "Amen," he took a spoonful of stew, gasped, then dropped his spoon into the bowl. "I should have said a longer prayer, my food is still too hot!"
_ _______________________________ _
We baby boomers know that our daughters don't share the same need to iron that we do.
This became very apparent while visiting our daughter on our way home from an extended trip. After doing my laundry, I asked my daughter for her iron and ironing board, which she retrieved from the far reaches of her storage room.
I was about to plug the iron into the outlet when my grandson walked by and said, "Gramma, is that going to be noisy?"
_ _______________________________ _
A co-worker was telling us about her sister who was coming to visit her. Someone asked how old her sister was, at which she paused, thought for a bit, and then answered, "She's half as old as I am, that's how I always remember."
So someone else (okay, it was me) said, "That's neat ... so every year that you age, she only ages half a year?"
My co-worker thought about that, and then said, "Oh, yeah, I guess it only works on even years."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: 12-Hour Shifts
A nurse had been doing twelve-hour shifts on a medical/surgical unit. One evening she finally got to enjoy an action movie with her husband.
They were sitting in the theater holding hands. During the exciting chase scene, he turned to her and said. "Look, if you wanna hold hands, fine. But quit taking my pulse, okay?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Sanctuary Lamp
A little boy was listening to a long and excessively boring sermon in church. Suddenly the red sanctuary lamp caught his eye.
Tugging his father's sleeve, he said, "When the light turns green, can we go?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Headlights On
As I pulled into the parking lot at the department store, I noticed a car with its headlights on. I jotted down the make, color and license number. Inside the store I joined the line at the information desk.
When the clerk reached me, I told her a white Ford in the parking lot had its lights on and gave her the number.
"Thank you," she replied, and went on to another customer.
The lady next to me asked her indignantly, "Aren't you going to announce it?"
"There's no need," she replied sheepishly. "That car belongs to me."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Marinate?
One evening a man was very impressed with the meat entree his wife had served. "What did you marinate this in?" he asked.
His wife immediately went into a long explanation about how much she loved him and how life wouldn't be the same without him, etc.
Eventually, his puzzled expression made her interrupt her answer with a question of her own, "What did you ask me?"
She chuckled at his answer and explained, "I thought you asked me if I would marry you again!"
As she left the room, he called out, "Well, would you marry me again?"
Without hesitation, she said, "Vinegar and barbecue sauce."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Fishing with Mom
I took my mother on a fishing excursion yesterday. Nobody was having any luck. After drifting for hours without so much as a nibble, who should hook into one but my Mom. Everyone on the boat was excited, cheering the old woman on and telling her to take her time.
Finally she lifted the fish into the boat, picked it up, removed the hook, looked at it up and down, and then tossed it back into the water.
I was stunned. I said, "Mom, why did you throw that fish back into the water?"
"I don't know. To me it just didn't look fresh."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Cup of Coffee?
In our home we tend to get the children to help out. One day our youngest son came in to the living room and asked, "Does anyone want a cup of coffee?"
"Yes please!" we said.
He replied, "What kind of coffee do you want? Capitated or decapitated?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Oven Mitt
At day care, a four-year-old watched as a teacher pulled something hot from the oven.
"What's that on your hand?" he asked.
"An oven mitt," she said. "It keeps me from getting burned. Doesn't your mother use them?
"No, my mom's just really careful when she opens the pizza box."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Grading the Fall
John was a construction foreman. One day he tumbled from a scaffold, managing to break his fall by grabbing on to parts of the scaffold on the way down. He received only minor scratches.
Embarrassed by the fall, he climbed back up to continue working. Then he noticed his co-workers holding up hastily-made signs reading, 9.6, 9.8, and 9.4.
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Back to School
After raising 4 children, and losing my husband, I decided to return to college and get the degree I had started, but never finished. And so, on my first day of college, eager with anticipation, and more than a little nervous, I took a front row seat in my first class in over 40 years, a literature course.
The professor told us we would be responsible for reading five books over the course of the semester, and that he would provide us with a list of authors from which we could choose.
He ambled over to the lectern, took out his class book, and began "Baker, Black, Brooks, Carter, Cook..."
I was working feverishly to get down all the names, when I felt a tap on my shoulder.
The student behind me whispered, "Slow down! He's just taking attendance!"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Kitchen
I heard recently about a stay-at-home Mom. One
evening she went to a PTA meeting and her husband and her oldest daughter got together and decided they would clean up the kitchen for her.
They put away all the food, wiped all the counters, washed all the pots and put them away, put the dishes in the dishwasher and ran it. They swept and mopped the floors and then sat down, awaiting her arrival.
Two hours later she returned from the meeting, took off her coat, hung it up, walked through the kitchen into the den, grabbed the remote control, and began watching television. They followed her over to her chair and stood by her side.
Finally she felt them looking over her shoulder and looked up at them and said, "What?"
Her husband said, "The kitchen."
"The kitchen. What?"
"The kitchen. We cleaned up the kitchen. Didn't you notice? It's sparkling clean. We cleaned it for you."
The woman replied, "Yes, I noticed. Thankless job, isn't it?
_ _______________________________ _
/ )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( \
/ / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ \
_( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / A Zen master once said to me, \ / \ _/ "Do the opposite of whatever \_ / / / I tell you." So I didn't. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Fun fact: They have square \ / \ _/ watermelons in Japan ... \_ / / / they stack better. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / The government cannot give to \ \_/ //// \ / anybody anything that the \ / \ _/ government does not first take \_ / / / from somebody else. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / "Silence is Golden" \ / \ _/ unless you have a toddler. \_ / / / Then, silence is just suspicious. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Never argue with a fool. \ / \ _/ People might not \_ / / / know the difference. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / Good things come in small \ \_/ //// \ / packages because big things \ / \ _/ can't, unless they're inflatable \_ / / / or require some assembly. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / The man who can smile \ \_/ //// \ / when things go wrong \ / \ _/ has thought of someone \_ / / / to blame it on. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / "The thing about quotes on the \ / \ _/ Internet is you cannot \_ / / / confirm their validity." \ \ - Abraham Lincoln (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ /If a turtle doesn't have a shell,\ / \ _/ is he homeless or naked? \_ / / / \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / If pro is the opposite of con, \ / \ _/ is progress the opposite \_ / / / of congress? \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Practice courtesy. \ / \ _/ You never know when it \_ / / / might become popular again. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / I don't feel like doing \ / \ _/ anything today. I think I've got \_ / / / an enlarged procrastinate. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / A grown-up is someone \ / \ _/ who suffers from responsibility. \_ / / / \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / Ballerinas are always \ \_/ //// \ / on their toes. \ / \ _/ Why don't they just get \_ / / / taller ballerinas? \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Everyone has a \ / \ _/ photographic memory. \_ / / / Some people just don't have film. \ \ _ _______________________________ _ / )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( \ / / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ \ _( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
The local news station was interviewing an 80-year-old lady because she had just gotten married for the fourth time. The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband's occupation. "He's a funeral director," she answered. "Interesting," the newsman thought...
He then asked her if she wouldn't mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living. She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years. After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she had first married a banker when she was in her 20's, then a circus ringmaster when in her 40's, and a preacher when in her 60's, and now - in her 80's - a funeral director.
The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked why she had married four men with such diverse careers.
She smiled and explained,
"I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go."
Thanks to Waneta
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WHERE TO RETIRE
You can retire to Phoenix, Arizona where...
1. You are willing to park 3 blocks away because you found shade.
2. You've experienced condensation on your hiney from the hot water in the toilet bowl.
3. You can drive for 4 hours in one direction and never leave town.
4. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.
5. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door.
6. The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!
OR
You can retire to California where...
1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
2. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
3. You know how to eat an artichoke.
4. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.
5. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.
6. The 4 seasons are: Fire, Flood, Mud, and Drought.
OR
You can retire to New York City where...
1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan .
2. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.
3. You think Central Park is "nature."
4. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.
5. You've worn out a car horn. (if you have a car).
6. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.
OR
You can retire to Minnesota where...
1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco .
2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
3. You have more than one recipe for casserole.
4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.
OR
You can retire to the Deep South where...
1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
2. "Y'all" is singular and "all y'all" is plural.
3. "He needed killin" is a valid defense.
4. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Ellen, Betty Jean, Mary Beth, etc etc.
5. Everything is either "in yonder," "over yonder" or "out yonder." It's important to know the difference, too.
OR
You can retire to Colorado where...
1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and so he stops at the day care center.
3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.
4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.
OR
You can retire to the Midwest where...
1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.
3. You have had to switch from "Heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"
5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different!"
OR
FINALLY You can retire to Florida where...
1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars.
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.
5. Cars in front of you often appear to be driven by headless people.
Thanks to Waneta
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WISDOM FROM MILITARY TRAINING MANUALS
'If the enemy is in range, so are you.'
- Infantry Journal -
___________________________________
'It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.'
- US. Air Force Manual -
___________________________________
'Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword, obviously never encountered automatic weapons.'
- General Douglas MacArthur -
___________________________________
'Tracers work both ways.'
- Army Ordnance Manual-
___________________________________
'Five-second fuses last about three seconds.'
- Infantry Journal -
___________________________________
'Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.'
- Naval Ops Manual -
___________________________________
'Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.'
- Unknown Infantry Recruit-
___________________________________
'If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up to him.'
- Infantry Journal-
___________________________________
'Yea, Though I Fly Through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 50,000 Feet and Climbing.'
- Sign over SR71 Wing Ops-
___________________________________
'You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.'
- Paul F. Crickmore (SR71 test pilot)-
___________________________________
'The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.'
- Unknown Author-
___________________________________
'If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage it has to be a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe.'
- Fixed Wing Pilot-
___________________________________
'When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.'
-Multi-Engine Training Manual-
___________________________________
'Without ammunition, the Air Force is just an expensive flying club.'
-Unknown Author-
___________________________________
'If you hear me yell; "Eject, Eject, Eject!", the last two will be echos.'
If you stop to ask "Why?", you'll be talking to yourself, because by then you'll be the pilot.'
-Pre-flight Briefing from a Canadian F104 Pilot-
___________________________________
'What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots?
If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; but If ATC screws up, .... the pilot dies.'
-Sign over Control Tower Door-
___________________________________
'Never trade luck for skill.'
-Author Unknown-
___________________________________
The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in military aviation are:' Did you feel that?' 'What's that noise?' and 'Oh S...!'
-Authors Unknown-
___________________________________
'Airspeed, altitude and brains . Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.'
-Basic Flight Training Manual-
___________________________________
'Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it..'
- Emergency Checklist-
___________________________________
'The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you.'
- Attributed to Max Stanley ( Northrop test pilot) -
___________________________________
'There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.'
-Sign over Squadron Ops Desk at Davis-Montham AFB , AZ-
___________________________________
'You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal.'
- Lead-in Fighter Training Manual -
___________________________________
As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives.
The rescuer sees the bloodied pilot and asks, 'What happened?'
The pilot's reply: 'I don't know, I just got here myself!'
Thanks to Joe Mullins
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Globalization?
This is probably the easiest rational explanation
of globalization that I can understand:
What is the truest definition of Globalization? Princess Diana's death.
An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, riding in a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, (check the bottle before you change the spelling), followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles, treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines.
This is sent to you by a Canadian, using American Bill Gates' technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian truck drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by Mexican illegals.....
That, my friends, is Globalization !
Thanks to Corrine Reagan
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Would You Like Dinner?
On an airplane, the flight attendant asked a man, "Would you like dinner?"
The man responded, "What are my choices?"
The flight attendant answered, "Yes, or no."
Received from dadiodio.
(_:][:_)
Can Cold Water Clean Dishes?
John went to visit his 90-year-old grandfather in a very secluded rural area of Saskatchewan. After spending a great evening chatting the night away, the next morning John's grandfather prepared a breakfast of bacon, eggs, and toast.
However, John noticed a film-like substance on his plate. He questioned his grandfather, "Are these plates clean?"
His grandfather replied, "They're as clean as cold water can get 'em. Just you go ahead and finish your meal, Sonny!"
For lunch the old man made hamburgers.
Again, John was concerned about the plates, as his appeared to have tiny specks around the edge that looked like dried egg. He asked, "Are you sure these plates are clean?"
Without looking up, the old man said, "I told you before, Sonny, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get them. Now don't you fret. I don't want to hear another word about it!"
Later that afternoon, John was on his way to a nearby town, and as he was leaving, his grandfather's dog started to growl and wouldn't let him pass.
John yelled and said, "Grandfather, your dog won't let me get to my car!"
Without diverting his attention from the football game he was watching on TV, the old man shouted, "Coldwater, go lay down now, yah hear me!"
Received from Reed Remington.
(_:][:_)
The homeowner was delighted with the way the painter had done all the work on his house. "You did a great job," he said as he handed the man a check. "Also, in order to thank you, here's an extra $80 to take the missus out to dinner and a movie."
Later that night, the doorbell rang and it was the painter. Thinking the man had forgotten something, he asked, "What's the matter? Did you forget something?"
"Nope," replied the painter. "I'm just here to take your missus out to dinner and a movie like you asked."
Received from Clean-Laffs.
(_:][:_)
Eileen's two-year-old great-grandson was excited about having his birthday in a few days. When asked how old he would be, he always said he would be four and held up four fingers.
His mother tried to explain that he would be three, that three came after two, but he wasn't convinced.
He told her that he had to be four because when he tried to hold up three fingers, the fourth came up too.
Received from Doc's Daily Chuckle.
(_:][:_)
What Would Look Sillier?
A salesman was trying to talk a farmer into buying a bicycle, but was meeting with considerable sales resistance.
"Shucks, I'd sooner spend my money on a cow," said the farmer.
"Ah," replied the salesman, "but think how silly you'd look riding around on a cow."
"Humph!" retorted the farmer. "Not near as silly as I'd look trying to milk a bicycle!"
Received from Andychap.
(_:][:_)
The Gorilla
There was a man who owned a giant gorilla and he'd never left it on its own. But eventually he had to take a trip, so he left his gorilla in the care of his next-door neighbor. He explained to his neighbor that all he had to do was feed his gorilla three bananas a day at three, six, and nine o'clock. But he was never ever to touch its fur.
So the next day the man came and gave the gorilla a banana and looked at it for a while thinking, "Why can't I touch its fur? Nothing seems to be wrong with it."
Every day he came in and sized up the gorilla for a little while longer as he still couldn't understand. About a week later, he'd worked himself into a frenzy and decided that he was going to touch the gorilla. He passed it the banana and very gently brushed the back of his hand against its fur.
Suddenly the gorilla went "ape" and started to violently jump around. Then it turned and began to running towards the man who, in turn, ran through the front door, over the lawn, across the street, into a sports car, and drove off.
In the rear-view mirror, he could see the gorilla in another sports car, driving right behind him and motioning for him to pull over. He drove for two hours until the engine began to splutter and the car just stopped. He jumped out and began to run down the street, over a brick wall, into someone's front garden, and up an apple tree. He turned around to find the gorilla right behind him beating its chest.
The man jumped down and ran back into the street screaming, until it became dark and he thought he'd lost the gorilla. The man ran into an alleyway then, suddenly, he saw a giant shadow coming down the street ahead. It was the gorilla!
This time there was no escape. As the gorilla neared him, the man began to feel faint. The giant beast came face to face with him, slowly raised its mighty hand and said, "Tag! You're it!"
Received from Mikala.
(_:][:_)
Top Ten Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery
10. Whoops! Somebody grab that ... we may need to put it back in later.
9. Spike! Spike! Come back with that! Bad dog! Bad, bad dog!
8. Is that supposed to be there? The book said it should be on the other side.
7. Sterile, schmerile.
6. That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?
5. Gosh, if this works, I hope they name the procedure after me!
4. Okay, we're ready for the transplant, wheel in the pig.
3. Don't worry, I think it's sharp enough.
2. No, don't throw that away, we'll probably need it for the autopsy.
AND THE NUMBER ONE THING YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR DURING SURGERY?
1. Can you stop that thing from beating? It's throwing my concentration off.
Received from Doc's Daily Chuckle.
(_:][:_)
Magnet
A teacher gave her class of second graders a lesson on the magnet and what it does.
The next day in a written test, she included this question: "My full name has six letters. The first one is M. I am strong and attractive. I pick up things. What am I?"
When the test papers were turned in, the teacher was astonished to find that almost 50 percent of the students answered the question with the word "Mother."
Received from Doc's Daily Chuckle.
(_:][:_)
To Mothers
This is for the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in their arms, wiping up barf laced with Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry Kool-Aid saying, "It's okay, honey, Mommy's here."
Who have sat in rocking chairs for hours on end soothing crying babies who can't be comforted.
This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their hair and milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purses.
For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween costumes. And all the mothers who DON'T.
This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see. And the mothers who took those babies and gave them homes.
This is for the mothers whose priceless art collections are hanging on their refrigerator doors.
And for all the mothers who froze their buns on metal bleachers at football or soccer games instead of watching from the warmth of their cars.
And that when their kids asked, "Did you see me, Mom?" they could say, "Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the world," and meant it.
This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store and swat them in despair when they stomp their feet and scream for ice cream before dinner. And for all the mothers who count to ten instead, but realize how child abuse happens.
This is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and explained all about making babies. And for all the (grand)mothers who wanted to, but just couldn't find the words.
This is for all the mothers who go hungry, so their children can eat.
For all the mothers who read "Goodnight, Moon" twice a night for a year. And then read it again. "Just one more time."
This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their shoelaces before they started school. And for all the mothers who opted for Velcro instead.
This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their daughters to sink a jump shot.
This is for every mother whose head turns automatically when a little voice calls "Mom?" in a crowd, even though they know their own offspring are at home -- or even away at college or have their own families.
This is for all the mothers who sent their kids to school with stomach aches, assuring them they'd be just FINE once they got there, only to get calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please pick them up. Right away.
This is for mothers whose children have gone astray, who can't find the words to reach them.
For all the mothers who bite their lips until they bleed when their 14-year-olds dye their hair green.
For all the mothers of the victims of recent school shootings, and the mothers of those who did the shootings.
For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of their TVs in horror, hugging their children who just came home from school safely.
This is for all the mothers who taught their children to be peaceful, and now pray they come home safely from a war.
What makes a good mother anyway? Is it patience? Compassion? Broad hips? The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time?
Or is it in her heart?
Is it the ache you feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time?
The jolt that takes you from sleep to dread, from bed to crib at 2 A.M. to put your hand on the back of a sleeping baby?
The panic, years later, that comes again at 2 A.M. when you just want to hear their key in the door and know they are safe again in your home?
Or the need to flee from wherever you are and hug your child when you hear news of a fire, a car accident, a child dying?
The emotions of motherhood are universal and so our thoughts are for young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep deprivation... And mature mothers learning to let go.
For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers.
Single mothers and married mothers.
Mothers with money, mothers without.
This is for you all. For all of us...
Hang in there. In the end we can only do the best we can.
Tell them every day that we love them. And pray and never stop being a mom.
Please pass along to all the moms in your life.
"Home is what catches you when you fall - and we all fall."
Please pass this to a wonderful mother you know. (I just did!)
Received from FranCMT2.
(_:][:_)
Peace and Quiet
Aunt Karen is the mother of two high-spirited young girls.
When I called her one morning, our conversation was constantly interrupted by the din of kids screaming and chasing each other. "Could you hold on for a moment?" my aunt finally asked, putting down the phone.
Within ten seconds all I could hear was absolute silence.
Then, "Okay, I'm back."
"But it's so quiet!" I exclaimed. "You must have complete control over those two."
"Not really," my aunt confessed wearily. "I'm in the
closet."
Received from Steve Brundage, Reader's Digest.
(_:][:_)
The Chief
"Next," the conference emcee announced, "we have the chief of the Minnesota State Patrol, Roger Ledding, who is here with his lovely wife, Beverly."
The chief took his place at the lectern. "I'm a little nervous," he began, "getting up before this distinguished audience and speaking today. But not nearly as nervous as I will be tonight when I must go home with my wife, Audrey, and explain Beverly to her!"
Received from Steve Sanderson.
(_:][:_)
Uncle Ted
Billy's homework assignment is to think of a true story with a moral so he goes home and thinks about it all night and finally has one.
The following day, Suzy raises her hand first and says, "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road."
The teacher asks for the moral to the story. Suzy replies, "Don't put all your eggs in one basket."
Next is Lucy. "Well, my dad owns a farm, too, and every weekend we take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only 8 of the 12 eggs hatched. The moral is, don't count your chicks before they are hatched.''
Billy is last to speak. He says, ''My uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam War. His plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed, with only a parachute, a bottle of bourbon, a machine gun, and a machete. As he floated down he drank the bottle of bourbon. Unfortunately, he landed right in the middle of 100 North Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of bullets so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. The blade broke on his machete, so he killed the last 10 with his bare hands.''
The teacher looks in shock at Billy and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story.
Billy replies, "Don't mess with my Uncle Ted when he's been drinking.''
Received from Mikala.
(_:][:_)
Elk Hunting
Bubba and Jake chartered a plane with a pilot to drop them off in the wilds of Alaska for a week of elk hunting, just the same as they did the year before.
When the pilot returned with the plane, Bubba exclaimed joyfully to the pilot, "We had a great hunting trip! We bagged four elk!"
The pilot regretfully explained, "Unfortunately, our plane can only fly with the weight of two elk. You'll have to leave the other two behind."
Bubba and Jake were both infuriated and insistent. "We won't allow you to fly this plane out without all four elk," Jake demanded.
The eager-to-please pilot relented and the plane took off with the three of them and their four elk. About fifteen minutes into the flight, the engine started to sputter, and within seconds they were hurtling to the ground.
Wearily arising from the wreckage, Bubba looked at Jake and wheezed, "Do you have any idea where we are?"
Jake, quite pleased with himself, replied, "Yes! We're about a mile from where we crashed last year."
Received from ArcaMax Jokes.
(_:][:_)
--
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Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a) Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Column - -
http://www.madkane.com/humor_blog/
Limerick Rose
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman quite often arose
From a difficult yoga-like pose
And, groaning, would claim:
“That position might maim,
But while in it, I manage to doze.”
© Madeleine Begun Kane. All Rights Reserved.
http://www.madkane.com/
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Candy joke:
Q: what country did candy come from?
A: sweeten
Cooking joke:
Q: why are cooks so cruel?
A: because they beat the eggs and whip the cream.
Vegetable joke:
Q: how do you fix a broken pizza?
A: with tomato paste.
Chocolate joke:
Q: how can you keep from getting a sharp pain in your eye when you drink chocolate milk?
A: take the spoon out of the glass.
Dieting joke:
Q: what do seven day of dieting do?
A: they make one weak (week).
http://foodanddrinkhumor.freeservers.com/whats_new.html
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"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." __ Franklin D. Roosevelt
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. _ _ George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" _ _ Queen E. Watson
“A political class of Republicans and Democrats that look after themselves, not the Nation. A media hostile to the very precepts of this nation. A generation of Americans who see morals as vices, and are ignorant of America's Actual History.”
"The things that will destroy America are prosperity-at-any-price, peace-at-any-price, safety-first instead of duty-first, the love of soft living, and the get-rich-quick theory of life." - - Theodore Roosevelt
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234_5655
(Non _ Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance _ 234_7371 (24 Hour)
Jail _ 234_5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control _ 800_222_1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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Interested in getting in touch with the Banner_News through e_mail? editor@bannernews.net For the editor, news@bannernews.net For news and sports items, Coming Events, Diary, Church News, school and civic events. [http://www.bannernews.net/]
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." __ "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" __ "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." __ "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." _ _ "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." _ _ Paul Troquille
“Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est.” Knowledge is power. _ Francis Bacon
"The problem is here and now. The time for talk is past. The time for action is now."
Comments on the first Earth Day _ James F. McClellan via John "Fuzzy" Thurman
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" __"Bug"
God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT_I KC5HII
P. S. If you'd like to be added to the distribution, just drop us E_mail at kc5hii@suddenlink.net
. We offer "Da Bleat" as text, a "Blog" and as a newsletter with pictures in Word and PDF format. The latest issue is usually updated sometime Saturday. For the latest issue, go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com. We also have a site [http://bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com/] where we post photos that I like.
We appreciate your encouragement. We also appreciate your communication when you desire to be taken off our mail list. If you are on this mail list by mistake or do not wish to receive "Da Bleat," please reply back and tell us to discontinue service to you.
Josiah & Ethan help put up the sign after MCCs Spaghetti supper.

Debra took this photo of me at the AR-1 DMAT meeting June 1 in Little Rock.
Annette's Lilies still look good after the storm.

I'm not sure exactly what's planted here but it reminds me of the "Invasion Of The Body Snatchers" movie.

Her baskets and wall plantings make an easy photograph.

This afternoon, the view from our eastern neighbor's home toward our northern neighbor's home was very relaxing.

Hello ALL,
School’s out and we’re getting more time with our youngest grandsons. Some kids might be a problem on a rainy, stormy day but Josiah and Ethan kept busy, playing (or playing with) dominos, reading (Ethan’s working on setting the Springhill Library record for number of books read. Josiah has moved away from “that kid stuff” to reading Tolkien, etc.) doing crafts (Mamaw always keeps a few craft kits handy for just such a day.) And, if we really get desperate, they can dip into the DVD vault for some TV time (but we prefer they use their time more constructively whenever possible.)

~~~~~
While Da Boys were working on their crafts Thursday, Ethan looked over at me and said; "Why don't you and mamaw ever argue when we're here?"
Annette immediately replied; “Well, there's nothing to get angry about when y'all are here and besides, we've already pretty much argued about everything there is to argue about."
He thought a moment and then said; "Makes sense. Anyone as old as y'all probably ran out of things to get mad about a long time ago."
~~~~~
What's the worst thing that can happen to a book addict? Having your daughter take a summer job at the Springhill, LA library.
She came by and made a list of my favorite authors and now she stops at the house weekly with a pile of books for me to read. I can't refuse them so I have to work hard reading every spare moment in order to be ready when the next shipment arrives.
I think I've overdosed and it's only a couple of weeks into summer.
~~~~~
Since I’ve been battling Congestive Heart Failure, Annette has become the “Salt Sheriff” of our home. Now, we cut way back on salt usage years ago. A box of salt lasts us years and one of our biggest complaints on eating out is that they often use too much salt in the cooking. We don’t even have a salt shaker on the table (which dinner guests often notice before anything else.)
But, we still get plenty of salt from processed foods and the meals we eat out. In fact, those two sources probably exceed the recommended daily sodium limits for most adults. So Annette has begun a rigorous review of all foods in the home as well as any that may be brought in from “afar.”
We’ve both learned to look at Fat, Fiber, Carb and Sodium content on any prepared foods we purchase. And the numbers will surprise you. So called “health” foods are often packed with Sodium and Carbs.
So today she was looking at my shopping list and I had “dried” chicken noodle soup on it (Lipton Soup Secrets, Noodle Soup with “Real” Chicken Broth). She was not pleased, just because one serving contains a measly 670 mg of sodium. I mean, this is less than half of the recommended daily sodium intake of 1,500 mg. and not even a third of the “Tolerable Upper Intake Level of 2,300 mg. as set by the Centers of Disease Control. Besides, I told her, “I only use this soup when I have an upset stomach.”

To which she replied; “We have fresh chicken broth in the freezer you can use for that.”
“Chicken Broth!” “That’s not going to keep my blood sugar from bottoming out!”
“O.K.” she said. “I’ll throw a noodle in it.”
There’s enough “Heart” in her for both of us.
~~~~~
My Classmate Chuck Jackson is the absolute King of Dry Wit. As you can see below.
~
Must have been a mite peckish seeing as I just finished off a plate of cold fries with no salt, no catsup, and absolutely no qualms. Running at more than forty dollars a dozen here in Santiago, I can seldom afford having qualms when I eat anyway, and never at home. Say we go to mass, though - without a couple of qualms to cut my appetite, so to speak, why, I'd like as not drain the communion cup. Worse at protestant communion services as I have a tremendous weakness for concord grape juice. Near fell in love under a concord grape arbor once. 'Course that was just puppy stuff - stepped in lots of it over the years. If you're wearing work shoes, you have to have a pocket knife and a water hose to get it out of the treads. Even so, two times out of five you get it on your finger. Once on the finger, it finds it way to your ear, and you just end up with a big mess.
~
You'd be hard put to find anyone over twelve who didn't know the words to at least seventy or eighty songs. Me? My rote memory is so bad that I know the first verse to two (2), Happy Birthday to You and the Star Spangled Banner. But that never stopped me from singing; I've always made up any lines I couldn't rightly remember. When I go to church and there's no hymnal nearby on the pew, I just sing right out anyway. After that first hymn, there'll be three or four people handing me their hymnals and the preacher and choir looking on to make sure I get one.
~~~~~
If we didn't have enough things to terrify us (i.e. Susan Rice being appointed National Security Adviser, Samantha Power stepping up to U.S. ambassador to the United Nations, over 300 drone killings to date, seizing news media emails, NSA monitoring ALL our phone calls, etc. etc.) now clowns are hiding in the woods!
Russell Brasel writes; "I've run across various sorts of snakes, gators, and seen fresh evidence of bears while hiking, but this might be the only thing that would cause me to drop my pack and run."

This clown mannequin was reportedly placed on a hiking trail deep in the Oleta River in Aventura, Florida by a park employee who got it from the Enchanted Forest Elaine Gordon Park in North Miami.
If you went hiking through Oleta River in Aventura Florida last year, you probably had to change your pants a couple miles in. (imgur.com)
~~~~~
I guess there are only so many events folks can remember. But Thursday (June 6) there was nothing in the paper, nothing that I saw on the evening news. ... It's a crying shame. Especially since most everyone knows of someone who took part in the battle. For instance, a few years ago, while visiting a grave at the Shiloh Cemetery outside of Lamartine, I noticed a head stone that read;
"Lloyd J. Burchfield
Arkansas
Pvt 456 PRCHT FA BN
82 ABN Div
World War II
Sep. 15, 1921 - Jun. 6, 1944"


That's the 456th Parachute Field Artillery Battalion whose first combat jump was in Sicily on the evening of July 9, 1943, in support of the 82nd Airborne Division's 505th Parachute Infantry Regiment. The battalion's primary mission was to fire at enemy troops and tanks utilizing a high arc, or indirect fire. During the intense Battle of Biazza Ridge, however, the battery had scored its first victory against enemy tanks using direct fire.
Following the Sicilian campaign, Batteries C and D remained with the 82nd Airborne Division and transferred to England to prepare for the invasion of France transferring the 456th PFAB designation to the European Theater.
The mission of the 82d Airborne Division on D-Day was to: "Land by parachute and glider before and after dawn astride the MERDERET River, seize, clear and secure the general area: CR (261938) - CR (265958) - CR (269975) - RJ (274982) - RJ (283992) - Bridge (308987) - NEUVILLE AU PLAIN (340985) - BANDIENVILLE (360987) within its zone; capture ST. MERE EGLISE (349965); seize and secure the crossings of the MERDERET River at (315957) and (321930), and a bridgehead covering them, with MLR along the general line: CR (261938) - CR (265953) - CR (269975) - RJ (274982) - RJ (283992); seize and destroy the crossing of the DOUVE River at BEUZEVILLE LA BASTILLE (309911) and ETIENVILLE (also known as PONT L'ABBE) (269927); protect the northwest flank of VII Corps within the Division zone; and be prepared to advance west on Corps order to the line of the DOUVE north of its junction with the PRAIRIES MARECAGEUSES."
This Force was commanded by Brigadier General JAMES M. GAVIN, assistant Division Commander, and was to be committed before dawn of D-Day with the gliders containing the 456th artillery, following the main body of paratroopers and began landing at 0404 hours. The gliders encountered fog and flak and they were scattered, and many of them were damaged upon crashing into the small fields and high hedgerows.
Enemy reaction to the landing of the 82d Airborne Division in the NORMANDY area was prompt and severe. Pvt Burchfield is listed on the Battalion's "Role Of Honor" as being killed in action June 6, 1944 in Normandy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkrqLoQXbpo
~~~~~
The U.S. Space Launch System, or SLS, will provide an entirely new capability for human exploration beyond Earth orbit. It also will back up commercial and international partner transportation services to the International Space Station. Designed to be flexible for crew or cargo missions, the SLS will be safe, affordable, and sustainable, to continue America's journey of discovery from the unique vantage point of space. The SLS will take astronauts farther into space than ever before, while engaging the U.S. aerospace workforce here at home.
The Initial 70-metric-ton SLS will stand 321 feet tall, provide 8.4 million pounds of thrust at liftoff, weigh 5.5 million pounds and carry 154,000 pounds of payload.

The massive 130-Metric-Ton Evolved Rocket Development configuration will be the most capable, powerful launch vehicle in history. Towering a staggering 384 feet tall, it will provide 9.2 million pounds of thrust at liftoff and weigh 6.5 million pounds. It will be able to carry payloads weighing 286,000 pounds to orbit. This configuration will use the same core stage, with four RS-25 engines, as the 70-metric-ton SLS.
http://www.nasa.gov/exploration/systems/sls/
http://www.nasa.gov/pdf/664158main_sls_fs_master.pdf
~~~~~
Also from Waneta [NOTE: I’ve edited out the name of the murder and victim in this story]
~
An “animal” shot and killed an innocent person in Georgia last March.
The killer is not a member of the NRA.
He did not use an assault rifle.
He did not get his stolen pistol from a gun show.
He did not attend Christian school, nor was he home schooled.
He did attend multicultural public education, and was not instructed in the Ten Commandments.
He already has a record for violent crimes.
He is gang member.
He never earned his hunter safety card, nor did he shoot CMP, Junior NRA, or 4H Air Rifle Competitions.
He was never instructed in gun safety from his father or grandfather.
He smokes weed.
While he has no job, nor was he looking for one, he is well fed, and does not need a job. He has no skills outside of crime.
He is not capable of doing a professional job interview, even though he spent 11 years in public education.
And as a side note...........
Today I swung my front door wide open and placed my Remington 870 right in the doorway.
I gave it 5 shells, then left it alone and went about my business.
While I was gone, the mailman delivered my mail, the neighbor boy across the street mowed the yard, a girl walked her dog down the street, and quite a few cars stopped at the stop sign just down from my house.
After about an hour, I checked on the gun. It was still sitting there, right where I had left it. It hadn't moved itself outside. It certainly hadn't killed anyone, even with the numerous opportunities it had been presented to do so. In fact, it hadn't even loaded itself.
Well you can imagine my surprise, with all the media hype about how dangerous guns are and how they kill people.
Either the media is wrong, and it's the misuse of guns by PEOPLE that kills people, or I'm in possession of the laziest gun in the world.
Alright, well I'm off to check on my spoons. I hear they're making people fat.
~~~~~
I remember my grandmother (Mrs. Mary Taylor) and my “mammy” (Mrs. Ida Mustifield) washing clothes this way using the wash pot in the back yard.
~
"Warshing" Clothes Recipe -- Imagine having a recipe for this! Years ago, an Alabama grandmother gave the new bride the following recipe exactly as written and found in an old scrapbook with spelling errors and all. (NOTE: For non-Southerners - wrench means rinse.)
WARSHING CLOTHES
Build fire in backyard to heat kettle of rain water.
Set tubs so smoke won’t blow in eyes if wind is pert.
Shave one hole cake of lie soap in boilin water.
Sort things, make 3 piles -- 1 pile white, 1 pile colored, 1 pile work britches and rags.
To make starch, stir flour in cool water to smooth, then thin down with boiling water.
Take white things, rub dirty spots on board, scrub hard, and boil, then rub colored don't boil just wrench and starch.
Take things out of kettle with broom stick handle, then wrench, and starch.
Hang old rags on fence.
Spread tea towels on grass.
Pore wrench water in flower bed.
Scrub porch with hot soapy water.
Turn tubs upside down.
Go put on clean dress, smooth hair with hair combs.
Brew cup of tea, sit, rock a spell, and count yore blessings.
~~~~~
Thanks to our friend Waneta Reardon for sharing this video with us. [http://puttinguptheflag.com/]
~~~~~
“Obama’s Arrogant Appointment”
You've got to hand it to him: President Obama's appointment of his U.N. ambassador, Susan Rice, to be his new national security advisor shows chutzpah!
Obama's administration is mired in accumulating scandals – from the Internal Revenue Service targeting his political enemies in the two years between a humiliating mid-term election drubbing and a successful re-election bid, to his attorney general's wholesale seizure of Associated Press phone records and fingering of Fox News correspondent James Rosen as a potential violator of the Espionage Act, to the public dissembling over the Benghazi attack and its fatal consequences for an American ambassador and three others.
For Obama to appoint to a White House post, exempt from Senate confirmation, a figure at the heart of one of these scandals -- the Benghazi attack – is a bold stroke. It's tempting to say that if Obama were as willing to take on America's implacable enemies overseas, like North Korea's Kim Jong Un or Iran's Islamic theocracy, as he is Congressional Republicans; perhaps we'd be having a bit more luck containing the looming nuclear-weapons-in-the-hands-of-lunatics menace that we face. ... G. Philip Hughes, U.S. News and World Report
http://www.usnews.com/opinion/blogs/g-philip-hughes/2013/06/06/obama-promoting-susan-rice-to-national-security-adviser-shows-extent-of-his-arrogance
~
While I agree with Mr. Hughes, in all fairness I have to remind my readers of a time when a Republican President did a similar thing. Ken Starr was initially appointed to investigate the suicide death of deputy White House counsel Vince Foster and the Whitewater real estate investments of Bill Clinton. The three-judge panel charged with administering the Independent Counsel Act later expanded the inquiry into numerous areas including an extramarital affair that Bill Clinton had with Monica Lewinsky. After several years of investigation (and untold millions of dollars) Starr filed the Starr Report which alleged that Bill Clinton had lied about existence of the affair during a sworn deposition.
The allegation that the President had lied (pshaw!), opened the door for the impeachment of Bill Clinton. And, after another expenditure of untold millions of dollars and who knows how many man-hours, the President was acquitted by the Senate on February 12, 1999.
What was Ken Starr’s punishment for wasting our money and time? He was appointed United States Solicitor General and served from 1989 to 1993 under President George H. W. Bush. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ken_Starr
Why do I care so much about Mr. Starr’s activities? Especially since I was no supporter of President Clinton? During Starr’s investigation, he epitomized the attitude of a Czar, using his subpoena powers to punish anyone who refused to lie for him (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Susan_McDougal) And for this, he was rewarded just as Susan Rice is being rewarded for lying to the public about the Benghazi incident so it wouldn’t adversely affect BO’s reelection bid.
Funny isn’t it. Clinton was impeached for lying and McDougal was imprisoned for not lying but the folks who really hurt the nation then and now get rewarded.
~~~~~
Rasmussin reports national polling results: 64% Say Most Members of Congress Don't Care What They Think
Voters remain convinced that Congress doesn't care what they think, and that includes the representative from their home district
~
Odds Grow Longer for Immigration Reform - - A Commentary By Scott Rasmussen
Many pundits assumed that this would be the year that comprehensive immigration reform became law. The conventional wisdom was that President Obama's re-election and his strong showing among Hispanic voters would force Republicans to go along.
Now, halfway through the year, the prospects for immigration reform have dimmed significantly.
Americans overwhelmingly feel that legal immigration is good for the country and think highly of immigrants. Seventy-six percent have a favorable view of immigrants who work hard, support their families and pursue the American Dream. Most (55 percent) still support the concept of comprehensive reform that will secure the border and legalize the status of many of those currently in the country illegally.
But they also want the system to work so that the border will be secure enough to prevent future illegal immigration.
http://www.rasmussenreports.com/public_content/political_commentary/commentary_by_scott_rasmussen/odds_grow_longer_for_immigration_reform
~~~~~
The Chicago Sun-Times laid off its entire full-time photography staff last week, including a Pulitzer Prize winner, in a move that the newspaper’s management said resulted from a need to shift toward more online video.
When questioned about the decision, the paper's management replied that they would rely on individual reporters taking photos for their stories.
I think they mistake the "Million Monkey" method of taking photos with a way to generate images that will be remembered for many decades.

Yes, with today’s proliferation of cameras on cell phones, tablets, etc. just about anyone can take a picture. But there's a big difference in taking a snapshot and knowing what to photograph, when to photograph it, how to photograph it and which photograph will work for the story.
http://www.newseum.org/exhibits-and-theaters/permanent-exhibits/pulitzer/
http://www.newseum.org/exhibits-and-theaters/permanent-exhibits/pulitzer/videos/pulitzer-prize-photos.html
~~~~~
Our classmate Chuck Jackson writes; “The U.S. Government is collecting millions of pieces of electronic data on us from telephone companies and internet services FOR OUR OWN GOOD. Trust the government. The government is our friend interested only in our safety and welfare. Trust the Justice Department, the IRS, and the State Department. These are our friends. (Our enemies must be in stitches by now.)”

Was I the only person who was disturbed by the passage of the USA PATRIOT (Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism) Act?
The Act dramatically reduced restrictions on law enforcement agencies' ability to search telephone, e-mail communications, medical, financial, and other records; eased restrictions on foreign intelligence gathering within the United States; expanded the Secretary of the Treasury’s authority to regulate financial transactions, particularly those involving foreign individuals and entities; and broadened the discretion of law enforcement.

Opponents of the law have criticized its authorization of indefinite detentions of immigrants; searches through which law enforcement officers search a home or business without the owner’s or the occupant’s permission or knowledge; the expanded use of National Security Letters, which allows the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) to search telephone, e-mail, and financial records without a court order; and the expanded access of law enforcement agencies to business records, including library and financial records. Since its passage, several legal challenges have been brought against the act, and Federal courts have ruled that a number of provisions are unconstitutional. With the latest excesses of the NSA and DOJ, I believe there will be many more court challenges. I hope they are successful in reigning in these liberty killing edicts.
I think Benjamin Franklin said it best: "Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."
~~~~~
Photos on the front of this week’s “Bleat” include - - Josiah & Ethan help put up the sign after MCCs Spaghetti supper. Debra took this photo of me at the AR-1 DMAT meeting June 1 in Little Rock. Annette's Lilies still look good after the storm. I'm not sure exactly what's planted here but it reminds me of the "Invasion Of The Body Snatchers" movie. Her baskets and wall plantings make an easy photograph. This afternoon, the view from our eastern neighbor's home toward our northern neighbor's home was very relaxing.
~~~~~
ACC SmartBrief - - acc@smartbrief.com - - Senate bill seeks easier loan qualifications for energy-efficient houses
06/7/2013 | New York Times (http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/07/business/senate-bill-sweetens-loans-for-energy-efficient-homes.html?_r=1&), The
A reintroduced Senate bill seeks to boost the buying power of people purchasing energy-efficient homes. Under the bill from Sens. Johnny Isakson, R-Ga., and Michael Bennet, D-Colo., homebuyers would qualify for larger mortgages than they normally would, provided they are using the mortgage to purchase an energy-efficient house. The bill will help promote energy-efficient home-building materials, which are usually "out of sight and out of mind and are not valued," Isakson said.
~~~~~
DarynKagan.com - - Where's Daryn?
So what up with the lack of new content? Why no daily newsletter from me?
I have a great excuse--I'm on a belated honeymoon with my new husband. We got married back in September, but with schedules, kids, and jobs and such, now seemed the best time to go.
I never was one to invest in order, anyway.
The Husband has whisked me away to a far away land and the most gorgeous beaches I've ever seen.
We're back next week and I promise pictures and of course, lots more uplifting and positive news!
So stay tuned!
~~~~~
Pea-Shirt artist Elizabeth Birchfield, a recent SAU graduate in Graphic Design (left) and festival chairman Ellie Baker show the 2013 PurpleHull Pea Festival Pea-Shirt. You can see Elizabeth's portfolio at: http://www.behance.net/elizabeth_birchfield
— with Ellie Mullins Baker at Emerson, Arkansas.

Supplemental to the Pea-Shirt. The "Small Town, Big Tillers" tank, and the "Peas Please Me" shirt, are available at Emerson Food Mart and Emerson Farmers Market. — at Emerson, Arkansas.

The Emerson PurpleHull Pea Festival “Million Tiller Parade” starts at 1 p.m. Saturday, June 29. The World Championship Rotary Tiller Race that evening. There are two classes, stock and modified but it's the modified class that most folks come to see. (PurpleHull.com)
Most tillers are powered by 5–10hp, gasoline engines. The tillers used in the Modified class are nothing like these stock machines. They must be based on a production tiller and retain the original gearbox and chassis. Beyond that, anything goes. The engine, throttle, and tines can be modified any way you choose, as long as the engine doesn't produce more than 50 hp.
Running behind a 50hp tiller--blades a spinnin'--is, well, nuts. A race begins with the machines idling, one competitor in each lane, with referees at the opposite end of the track working a stopwatch. A starter waves a flag, and the racers go for it. They must keep their feet on the ground and hands on the bars during the race. A three-second penalty is assessed for being dragged across the finish line or exiting the lane. YouTube has some nutty videos of racers who can't keep up with their machines and eat dirt. Search "rototiller racing" and be entertained.
Read more:
http://www.hotrod.com/feature_stories/hrdp_1211_hot_rod_anything_rocket_rototiller/#ixzz2VeHvxnCH
~~~~~
Favorite Quotes:
"Discernment is God's call to intercession, never to faultfinding."
Corrie Ten Boom
~
Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured. ~ Mark Twain - - Thanks to Ron Hazelton
~
The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.
Will Rogers
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
Will Rogers
If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.
Will Rogers
~
Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.
Mark Twain
It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native criminal class except Congress.
Mark Twain
~~~~~
The following wisdom is shared by our friends.
~
Chuck Jackson
Who told? C´mon, fess up. My little secret about leaving twenty minutes before rush hour to beat the traffic is OUT! I think half of Santiago is on to it now.
Just because you're offended, doesn't mean you're right.
~
Nancee Davis Law
When God shows up, He shows out.
Life without music is like cookies without milk
God is faithful even if we are faithless.
Before you complain about how GOD treats you, you should think of how you treat GOD
God isn’t against you having nice things. He’s against nice things having you
Prayer is an open channel to God's heart.
I could definitely become a morning person...if it started later in the day.
I had a thought that I need to clean today but hopefully that thought will pass.
Your tongue can be a powerful weapon. be careful what you say.
~
Dustin McClellan
I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue are the colors of freedom until they are flashing behind you.
~
Quinton Riggins
Does the US government approve of what you have posted on FB today?
Still thinking about being a storm chaser? I'm not.
Warning!!! Men: please do not tell your wife the truth if she asks you if her clothes are looking too tight. I'll be okay. The bruises should clear up in a week or two.
~
Norma Kay Rowe
Joyce Meyer Ministries
It's our duty as Christians to forgive. God teaches us that. He did it first!
what if we woke up this morning with only the things we thanked God for yesterday. I would be in trouble for sure!!
If you want peace, then you need to be willing to make the changes required to obtain it!!!!! Joyce Meyer
~
Dalicia Torrence
" Never let another person define how you feel about you. "
-T.D. Jakes
~~~~~
AskBob - - Bob Rankin - - HELP... My Email Was Hijacked!
Category: Email
A reader asks: 'Can you please help, somehow my email account got hijacked, and now all my friends are getting spam, from me! I am always careful with my password. How could this have happened, and what should I do?'
Read more: http://askbobrankin.com/help_my_email_was_hijacked.html#ixzz2VeMkO9kH
~
Is Someone Stealing My WiFi?
Category: Wireless
Is your wireless Internet connection sometimes mysteriously slow? It's possible that you're sharing it with a stranger. But how can you know for sure if a neighbor or a malicious hacker has tapped into your wifi? Read on to learn how you can detect bandwidth bandits, and give them the boot...
Read more: http://askbobrankin.com/is_someone_stealing_my_wifi.html#ixzz2VeN89Utu
~~~~~
Diabetes Life - - www.dlife.com
Blueberry Cheese "Danish" - - Super healthy, low carb version of a decadent breakfast treat.
Prep Time: 10 minutes
Cook Time: 5 minutes
Difficulty: Easy
Nutrition Facts
Makes 2 servings
Amount Per Serving
Calories 138.7
Total Carbs 9.4 g
Dietary Fiber 2.4 g
Sugars 3.7 g
Total Fat 10.6 g
Saturated Fat 6.0 g
Unsaturated Fat 0.4 g
Potassium 54.9 mg
Protein 4.4 g
Sodium 65.0 mg
Dietary Exchanges
10.5989 Fat, 0.3515 Fruits,
Ingredients
1 tsp unsalted butter
3 tbsp cream cheese
0 1/2 cup fresh blueberries
1 piece lavash (flax, oat bran, whole wheat)
Directions
Preheat oven or toaster oven to 325°F. Wrap lavash in foil. Place on center oven rack for 10 minutes.
Remove from foil.
On warmed lavash, spread, butter, cream cheese, and top with mashed blueberries.
Slice in half, and roll into two portions. Secure with toothpicks.
Replace on foil, heat 5 minutes in oven.
http://www.dlife.com/diabetes/diabetic-recipes/reciperesults.html?recipeId=10383440&utm_source=Foodstuff-20130604&utm_medium=eNewsletter&utm_content=Foodstuff-newsletter&utm_term=Focused&utm_campaign=dLife-eNewsletter&
~~~~~
The latest from Michael Yon, the foremost “milnews” blogger on the web.
~
Greetings,
Verizon secretly ordered to turn over phone records. This has been breaking news in the UK.
Remember the Cold War when we were fighting against these things? Now we are these things.
[http://www.michaelyon-online.com/verizon-ordered-to-turn-over-records.htm]
Very Respectfully,
Michael Yon
Your Writer,
Please remember that this website accepts no advertisement and is dependent on your support.
PS Please sign up for my Twitter.com updates at "Michael_Yon" [http://twitter.com/Michael_Yon] (not Michael Yon).
http://www.facebook.com/#/MichaelYonFanPage?ref=sgm
~
www.michaelyon-online.com
~
Http://www.michaelyon_online.com/index.php
~~~~~
If you would like to encourage US Troops overseas, but are not sure just how to begin, visit www.anysoldier.com for ideas.
~~~~~
5 Things New Veterans Expect From All Candidates
1. Defend the New GI Bill
2. Employ the New Greatest Generation
3. Prevent suicide among troops and veterans
4. Build a truly 21st Century VA
5. Improve Care for Female Veterans
http://iava.org/blog/5-things-new-veterans-expect-all-candidates-2012
~~~~~
Please remember ... America is not at war. The U.S. Military is at war. America is at the MALL.
~~~~~
"Today's Seed" from E-MIN
You brought me more happiness than a rich harvest of grain and grapes. I can lie down and sleep soundly because you, LORD, will keep me safe. (Psa 4:7-8 CEV)
Sign up to receive your own Today's Seed: www.e-min.org/msg.htm - -Share Today's Seed with family & friends: www.e-min.org/rects.htm Connect with Randall: www.facebook.com/RandallVaughnBooks or www.twitter.com/randallvaughn Get Randall's new book: My Lyrics, My Life https://www.createspace.com/4092337
Today's Seed by Randall Vaughn is published daily (M-F) by E-MIN Global Ministries, P O Box 220, Warrior, AL 35180 (USA) www.e-min.org Copyright Terms/Permissions/List Privacy www.e-min.org/tp.htm Today's Seed(TM) (c) 2012 Randall Vaughn All Rights Reserved Worldwide.
~~~~~
http://www.shelfari.com
http://www.shelfari.com/bugsbleat/shelf
~~~~~
For the latest issue of "Da Bleat.", go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com.
Our photos are posted at http://www.bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
“… Christians we can’t be blind-sided by the accelerating speed at which the culture is jettisoning traditional views of sexuality. Nor should we be intimidated by the hostility we’ll face for our beliefs.”
BreakPoint - - Not that There's Anything Wrong with That - - What Is -- or Isn’t -- Homophobic
By: Eric Metaxas|
Cultural views on homosexuality are changing so rapidly, it’s hard to keep track of what is or isn’t homophobic anymore.
Eric Metaxas
In a classic episode of “Seinfeld” entitled “The Outing,” a student reporter is convinced that Jerry and George Costanza are gay. They strenuously deny being gay, while adding “not that there's anything wrong with that.”
The phrase almost immediately became part of the way Americans talk about homosexuality.
The “Seinfeld” episode came to mind while reading recently about the brouhaha concerning Roy Hibbert of the NBA’s Indiana Pacers. During a press conference, Hibbert used profanity and commented about being “stretched out” on the basketball court. And then he used the phrase “no homo.”
If you’re unfamiliar with that phrase, you’re not alone. It’s an expression from rap music asserting that “the speaker of such does not have any homosexual intent.”
If that sounds like Wikipedia, that’s because it is. I didn’t know what it meant, and I strongly suspect that 99 percent of the people in the room didn’t either. That didn’t stop news of Hibbert’s “gay slur” from becoming the biggest sports story of the weekend.
The NBA fined Hibbert $75,000, saying it was necessary to demonstrate that “such offensive comments will not be tolerated.” I think that comes out to $25,000 per syllable.
I’m not going to defend Hibbert. His profanity alone warranted a fine, and absent his “no homo” comment, I doubt that anyone would have read anything sexual into what he said.
But I can’t help but notice that what constitutes a “gay slur” is a moving target. LeBron James used the same phrase a few years back and nobody cared.
Again, I’m not defending anyone—I’m simply noting how fast the definitions of “homophobia” and “bigotry” are changing.
Take the issue of same-sex marriage. A few weeks ago, Michael Kinsley of the New Republic, commenting on the furor over Dr. Ben Carson’s opposition to same-sex marriage, rightly noted that Carson “has views on gay rights somewhat more progressive than those of the average Democratic senator ten years ago.”
In fact, Carson’s position is about the same as President Obama’s position just two years ago! Yet, Carson’s opinion is considered beyond-the-pale in many circles today.
All of this has me wondering whether a Seinfeld episode like “The Outing” could even be produced today. The phrase “not that there's anything wrong with that” was a classic because it captured the audience’s ambivalence about homosexuality: While people aspired to be “tolerant” and “open-minded,” they certainly didn’t want others thinking that they engaged in same-sex relations.
Some commentators are displaying the same ambivalence in reaction to the new HBO film on Liberace. They confess to being put off by the homosexual content—all the while feeling guilty about being put off.
If such ambivalence isn’t already branded as “homophobia,” it will be soon. The mere suggestion that there might be something wrong with same-sex relationships will be considered “homophobia.”
So why bring this up on BreakPoint? Well, as Christians we can’t be blind-sided by the accelerating speed at which the culture is jettisoning traditional views of sexuality. Nor should we be intimidated by the hostility we’ll face for our beliefs.
It may be that the culture will soon be beyond repair—that traditional views will not be tolerated. Or maybe not. But one thing’s for certain, we must, by God’s grace, hold fast to His plan for human sexuality: marriage between one man and one woman, one time, for the couple’s mutual joy and the procreation of children.
Only then will we be able to preserve—or perhaps create anew—a culture of life, goodness, health, and beauty.
And nothing is wrong with that.
~
Takeaction - Next Steps
It seems everything has become a battleground for ideology. Be aware of this when engaging in today’s cultural setting. It's important to stand up for the truth, even though conversations may be difficult and costly in this sometimes hostile environment.
Promote the culture of life, goodness, health, and beauty as Eric discussed, doing it winsomely and with grace.
Articles:
Shutting Down Free Speech [http://www.breakpoint.org/commentaries/2629-shutting-down-free-speech]
Chuck Colson | BreakPoint.org | July 25, 2007
The Coming Persecution [http://www.breakpoint.org/commentaries/2398-the-coming-persecution]
Chuck Colson | BreakPoint.org | July 1, 2008
The Thought Police [http://www.breakpoint.org/bpcommentaries/breakpoint-commentaries-search/entry/13/10733]
Chuck Colson | BreakPoint.org | May 1, 2007
When Two So-Called “Married” Women (or Men) Repent
John Piper | desiringgod.org | June 4, 2013 [http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/when-two-so-called-married-women-or-men-repent]
[http://www.breakpoint.org/bpcommentaries]
Copyright © 2013 Colson Center. All Rights Reserved
~~~~~
Residents of Columbia County, Arkansas are represented in Congress by:
~
Senator John Boozman (R_ AR)
1 Russell Courtyard
Washington DC, 20510
Phone: 202-224-4843
http://boozman.senate.gov/
~
Senator Mark Pryor (D_ AR)
Phone 202_224_2353
FAX 202_228_0908
http://pryor.senate.gov/
~
Representative Tom Cotton (R )
Phone 202_225_3772
FAX 202_225_1314
http://cotton.house.gov/
Other states congresspersons can be found at: [http://www.visi.com/juan/congress/]
~~~~~
THOUGHT OF THE DAY:
"One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and, if it were possible, speak a few reasonable words." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
"Everything should be kept as simple as possible, but no simpler." - Albert Einstein
"The reading of all good books is like a conversation with the finest men of past centuries." - Rene Descartes
"Action is the antidote to despair." - Joan Baez
"To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness." - Bertrand Russell
"No man for any considerable period can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true." - Nathaniel Hawthorne
"Live a balanced life. Learn some and think some, and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some." - Robert Fulghum
~~~~~
Breaking Christian News
Author Stephen King has revealed he believes in God, saying those that don't are ignoring creation.
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=11691
Huge Breakthrough for Multiple Sclerosis Treatment “Our approach leaves the function of the normal immune system intact. That's the holy grail." -Stephen Miller
http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=11736
editor@breakingchristiannews.com
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
GCF: If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Geology Degree
My parents scoffed, but I knew my college degree in geology would come in handy one day. It was during Army Basic Training in Texas and I was pulling KP duty.
When the sergeant asked me what I did in civilian life, I proudly said that I was a geologist.
"Good. I'm looking for someone with your background," he said, while dropping a bulging sack onto the table. "You've got just the right qualifications to pick the rocks out of these potatoes before you peel them."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Emergency Call
Shopping one afternoon, I was paged to come to the mall office. I rushed over and an office clerk said that I was to call home right away.
Fearing the worst, I found a pay phone. When my teenage daughter answered, I immediately asked what was wrong. "Everything's fine, Mom," she said. "But I have a date in an hour and I want to wear the shoes you have on."
_ _______________________________ _
My four-year-old likes to say the blessing at mealtimes, usually repeating the same short prayer: "Thank you, God, for this gracious food. Amen."
One evening, however, he offered thanks for the birds, the trees, each of his friends, and asked God to watch over his family and help them to be good.
I was thrilled that he was finally praying from the heart.
But after the "Amen," he took a spoonful of stew, gasped, then dropped his spoon into the bowl. "I should have said a longer prayer, my food is still too hot!"
_ _______________________________ _
We baby boomers know that our daughters don't share the same need to iron that we do.
This became very apparent while visiting our daughter on our way home from an extended trip. After doing my laundry, I asked my daughter for her iron and ironing board, which she retrieved from the far reaches of her storage room.
I was about to plug the iron into the outlet when my grandson walked by and said, "Gramma, is that going to be noisy?"
_ _______________________________ _
A co-worker was telling us about her sister who was coming to visit her. Someone asked how old her sister was, at which she paused, thought for a bit, and then answered, "She's half as old as I am, that's how I always remember."
So someone else (okay, it was me) said, "That's neat ... so every year that you age, she only ages half a year?"
My co-worker thought about that, and then said, "Oh, yeah, I guess it only works on even years."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: 12-Hour Shifts
A nurse had been doing twelve-hour shifts on a medical/surgical unit. One evening she finally got to enjoy an action movie with her husband.
They were sitting in the theater holding hands. During the exciting chase scene, he turned to her and said. "Look, if you wanna hold hands, fine. But quit taking my pulse, okay?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Sanctuary Lamp
A little boy was listening to a long and excessively boring sermon in church. Suddenly the red sanctuary lamp caught his eye.
Tugging his father's sleeve, he said, "When the light turns green, can we go?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Headlights On
As I pulled into the parking lot at the department store, I noticed a car with its headlights on. I jotted down the make, color and license number. Inside the store I joined the line at the information desk.
When the clerk reached me, I told her a white Ford in the parking lot had its lights on and gave her the number.
"Thank you," she replied, and went on to another customer.
The lady next to me asked her indignantly, "Aren't you going to announce it?"
"There's no need," she replied sheepishly. "That car belongs to me."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Marinate?
One evening a man was very impressed with the meat entree his wife had served. "What did you marinate this in?" he asked.
His wife immediately went into a long explanation about how much she loved him and how life wouldn't be the same without him, etc.
Eventually, his puzzled expression made her interrupt her answer with a question of her own, "What did you ask me?"
She chuckled at his answer and explained, "I thought you asked me if I would marry you again!"
As she left the room, he called out, "Well, would you marry me again?"
Without hesitation, she said, "Vinegar and barbecue sauce."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Fishing with Mom
I took my mother on a fishing excursion yesterday. Nobody was having any luck. After drifting for hours without so much as a nibble, who should hook into one but my Mom. Everyone on the boat was excited, cheering the old woman on and telling her to take her time.
Finally she lifted the fish into the boat, picked it up, removed the hook, looked at it up and down, and then tossed it back into the water.
I was stunned. I said, "Mom, why did you throw that fish back into the water?"
"I don't know. To me it just didn't look fresh."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Cup of Coffee?
In our home we tend to get the children to help out. One day our youngest son came in to the living room and asked, "Does anyone want a cup of coffee?"
"Yes please!" we said.
He replied, "What kind of coffee do you want? Capitated or decapitated?"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Oven Mitt
At day care, a four-year-old watched as a teacher pulled something hot from the oven.
"What's that on your hand?" he asked.
"An oven mitt," she said. "It keeps me from getting burned. Doesn't your mother use them?
"No, my mom's just really careful when she opens the pizza box."
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Grading the Fall
John was a construction foreman. One day he tumbled from a scaffold, managing to break his fall by grabbing on to parts of the scaffold on the way down. He received only minor scratches.
Embarrassed by the fall, he climbed back up to continue working. Then he noticed his co-workers holding up hastily-made signs reading, 9.6, 9.8, and 9.4.
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Back to School
After raising 4 children, and losing my husband, I decided to return to college and get the degree I had started, but never finished. And so, on my first day of college, eager with anticipation, and more than a little nervous, I took a front row seat in my first class in over 40 years, a literature course.
The professor told us we would be responsible for reading five books over the course of the semester, and that he would provide us with a list of authors from which we could choose.
He ambled over to the lectern, took out his class book, and began "Baker, Black, Brooks, Carter, Cook..."
I was working feverishly to get down all the names, when I felt a tap on my shoulder.
The student behind me whispered, "Slow down! He's just taking attendance!"
_ _______________________________ _
GCF: Kitchen
I heard recently about a stay-at-home Mom. One
evening she went to a PTA meeting and her husband and her oldest daughter got together and decided they would clean up the kitchen for her.
They put away all the food, wiped all the counters, washed all the pots and put them away, put the dishes in the dishwasher and ran it. They swept and mopped the floors and then sat down, awaiting her arrival.
Two hours later she returned from the meeting, took off her coat, hung it up, walked through the kitchen into the den, grabbed the remote control, and began watching television. They followed her over to her chair and stood by her side.
Finally she felt them looking over her shoulder and looked up at them and said, "What?"
Her husband said, "The kitchen."
"The kitchen. What?"
"The kitchen. We cleaned up the kitchen. Didn't you notice? It's sparkling clean. We cleaned it for you."
The woman replied, "Yes, I noticed. Thankless job, isn't it?
_ _______________________________ _
/ )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( \
/ / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ \
_( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / A Zen master once said to me, \ / \ _/ "Do the opposite of whatever \_ / / / I tell you." So I didn't. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Fun fact: They have square \ / \ _/ watermelons in Japan ... \_ / / / they stack better. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / The government cannot give to \ \_/ //// \ / anybody anything that the \ / \ _/ government does not first take \_ / / / from somebody else. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / "Silence is Golden" \ / \ _/ unless you have a toddler. \_ / / / Then, silence is just suspicious. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Never argue with a fool. \ / \ _/ People might not \_ / / / know the difference. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / Good things come in small \ \_/ //// \ / packages because big things \ / \ _/ can't, unless they're inflatable \_ / / / or require some assembly. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / The man who can smile \ \_/ //// \ / when things go wrong \ / \ _/ has thought of someone \_ / / / to blame it on. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / "The thing about quotes on the \ / \ _/ Internet is you cannot \_ / / / confirm their validity." \ \ - Abraham Lincoln (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ /If a turtle doesn't have a shell,\ / \ _/ is he homeless or naked? \_ / / / \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / If pro is the opposite of con, \ / \ _/ is progress the opposite \_ / / / of congress? \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Practice courtesy. \ / \ _/ You never know when it \_ / / / might become popular again. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / I don't feel like doing \ / \ _/ anything today. I think I've got \_ / / / an enlarged procrastinate. \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / A grown-up is someone \ / \ _/ who suffers from responsibility. \_ / / / \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / Ballerinas are always \ \_/ //// \ / on their toes. \ / \ _/ Why don't they just get \_ / / / taller ballerinas? \ \ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// \ / Everyone has a \ / \ _/ photographic memory. \_ / / / Some people just don't have film. \ \ _ _______________________________ _ / )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( \ / / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ \ _( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_ (((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| /))) \\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ //// If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
The local news station was interviewing an 80-year-old lady because she had just gotten married for the fourth time. The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband's occupation. "He's a funeral director," she answered. "Interesting," the newsman thought...
He then asked her if she wouldn't mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living. She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years. After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she had first married a banker when she was in her 20's, then a circus ringmaster when in her 40's, and a preacher when in her 60's, and now - in her 80's - a funeral director.
The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked why she had married four men with such diverse careers.
She smiled and explained,
"I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go."
Thanks to Waneta
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
WHERE TO RETIRE
You can retire to Phoenix, Arizona where...
1. You are willing to park 3 blocks away because you found shade.
2. You've experienced condensation on your hiney from the hot water in the toilet bowl.
3. You can drive for 4 hours in one direction and never leave town.
4. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.
5. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door.
6. The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!
OR
You can retire to California where...
1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
2. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
3. You know how to eat an artichoke.
4. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.
5. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.
6. The 4 seasons are: Fire, Flood, Mud, and Drought.
OR
You can retire to New York City where...
1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan .
2. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.
3. You think Central Park is "nature."
4. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.
5. You've worn out a car horn. (if you have a car).
6. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.
OR
You can retire to Minnesota where...
1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco .
2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
3. You have more than one recipe for casserole.
4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.
OR
You can retire to the Deep South where...
1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
2. "Y'all" is singular and "all y'all" is plural.
3. "He needed killin" is a valid defense.
4. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Ellen, Betty Jean, Mary Beth, etc etc.
5. Everything is either "in yonder," "over yonder" or "out yonder." It's important to know the difference, too.
OR
You can retire to Colorado where...
1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and so he stops at the day care center.
3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.
4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.
OR
You can retire to the Midwest where...
1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.
3. You have had to switch from "Heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"
5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different!"
OR
FINALLY You can retire to Florida where...
1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars.
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.
5. Cars in front of you often appear to be driven by headless people.
Thanks to Waneta
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
WISDOM FROM MILITARY TRAINING MANUALS
'If the enemy is in range, so are you.'
- Infantry Journal -
___________________________________
'It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.'
- US. Air Force Manual -
___________________________________
'Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword, obviously never encountered automatic weapons.'
- General Douglas MacArthur -
___________________________________
'Tracers work both ways.'
- Army Ordnance Manual-
___________________________________
'Five-second fuses last about three seconds.'
- Infantry Journal -
___________________________________
'Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.'
- Naval Ops Manual -
___________________________________
'Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.'
- Unknown Infantry Recruit-
___________________________________
'If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up to him.'
- Infantry Journal-
___________________________________
'Yea, Though I Fly Through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 50,000 Feet and Climbing.'
- Sign over SR71 Wing Ops-
___________________________________
'You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.'
- Paul F. Crickmore (SR71 test pilot)-
___________________________________
'The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.'
- Unknown Author-
___________________________________
'If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage it has to be a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe.'
- Fixed Wing Pilot-
___________________________________
'When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.'
-Multi-Engine Training Manual-
___________________________________
'Without ammunition, the Air Force is just an expensive flying club.'
-Unknown Author-
___________________________________
'If you hear me yell; "Eject, Eject, Eject!", the last two will be echos.'
If you stop to ask "Why?", you'll be talking to yourself, because by then you'll be the pilot.'
-Pre-flight Briefing from a Canadian F104 Pilot-
___________________________________
'What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots?
If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; but If ATC screws up, .... the pilot dies.'
-Sign over Control Tower Door-
___________________________________
'Never trade luck for skill.'
-Author Unknown-
___________________________________
The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in military aviation are:' Did you feel that?' 'What's that noise?' and 'Oh S...!'
-Authors Unknown-
___________________________________
'Airspeed, altitude and brains . Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.'
-Basic Flight Training Manual-
___________________________________
'Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it..'
- Emergency Checklist-
___________________________________
'The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you.'
- Attributed to Max Stanley ( Northrop test pilot) -
___________________________________
'There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.'
-Sign over Squadron Ops Desk at Davis-Montham AFB , AZ-
___________________________________
'You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal.'
- Lead-in Fighter Training Manual -
___________________________________
As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives.
The rescuer sees the bloodied pilot and asks, 'What happened?'
The pilot's reply: 'I don't know, I just got here myself!'
Thanks to Joe Mullins
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Globalization?
This is probably the easiest rational explanation
of globalization that I can understand:
What is the truest definition of Globalization? Princess Diana's death.
An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, riding in a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, (check the bottle before you change the spelling), followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles, treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines.
This is sent to you by a Canadian, using American Bill Gates' technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian truck drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by Mexican illegals.....
That, my friends, is Globalization !
Thanks to Corrine Reagan
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
Would You Like Dinner?
On an airplane, the flight attendant asked a man, "Would you like dinner?"
The man responded, "What are my choices?"
The flight attendant answered, "Yes, or no."
Received from dadiodio.
(_:][:_)
Can Cold Water Clean Dishes?
John went to visit his 90-year-old grandfather in a very secluded rural area of Saskatchewan. After spending a great evening chatting the night away, the next morning John's grandfather prepared a breakfast of bacon, eggs, and toast.
However, John noticed a film-like substance on his plate. He questioned his grandfather, "Are these plates clean?"
His grandfather replied, "They're as clean as cold water can get 'em. Just you go ahead and finish your meal, Sonny!"
For lunch the old man made hamburgers.
Again, John was concerned about the plates, as his appeared to have tiny specks around the edge that looked like dried egg. He asked, "Are you sure these plates are clean?"
Without looking up, the old man said, "I told you before, Sonny, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get them. Now don't you fret. I don't want to hear another word about it!"
Later that afternoon, John was on his way to a nearby town, and as he was leaving, his grandfather's dog started to growl and wouldn't let him pass.
John yelled and said, "Grandfather, your dog won't let me get to my car!"
Without diverting his attention from the football game he was watching on TV, the old man shouted, "Coldwater, go lay down now, yah hear me!"
Received from Reed Remington.
(_:][:_)
The homeowner was delighted with the way the painter had done all the work on his house. "You did a great job," he said as he handed the man a check. "Also, in order to thank you, here's an extra $80 to take the missus out to dinner and a movie."
Later that night, the doorbell rang and it was the painter. Thinking the man had forgotten something, he asked, "What's the matter? Did you forget something?"
"Nope," replied the painter. "I'm just here to take your missus out to dinner and a movie like you asked."
Received from Clean-Laffs.
(_:][:_)
Eileen's two-year-old great-grandson was excited about having his birthday in a few days. When asked how old he would be, he always said he would be four and held up four fingers.
His mother tried to explain that he would be three, that three came after two, but he wasn't convinced.
He told her that he had to be four because when he tried to hold up three fingers, the fourth came up too.
Received from Doc's Daily Chuckle.
(_:][:_)
What Would Look Sillier?
A salesman was trying to talk a farmer into buying a bicycle, but was meeting with considerable sales resistance.
"Shucks, I'd sooner spend my money on a cow," said the farmer.
"Ah," replied the salesman, "but think how silly you'd look riding around on a cow."
"Humph!" retorted the farmer. "Not near as silly as I'd look trying to milk a bicycle!"
Received from Andychap.
(_:][:_)
The Gorilla
There was a man who owned a giant gorilla and he'd never left it on its own. But eventually he had to take a trip, so he left his gorilla in the care of his next-door neighbor. He explained to his neighbor that all he had to do was feed his gorilla three bananas a day at three, six, and nine o'clock. But he was never ever to touch its fur.
So the next day the man came and gave the gorilla a banana and looked at it for a while thinking, "Why can't I touch its fur? Nothing seems to be wrong with it."
Every day he came in and sized up the gorilla for a little while longer as he still couldn't understand. About a week later, he'd worked himself into a frenzy and decided that he was going to touch the gorilla. He passed it the banana and very gently brushed the back of his hand against its fur.
Suddenly the gorilla went "ape" and started to violently jump around. Then it turned and began to running towards the man who, in turn, ran through the front door, over the lawn, across the street, into a sports car, and drove off.
In the rear-view mirror, he could see the gorilla in another sports car, driving right behind him and motioning for him to pull over. He drove for two hours until the engine began to splutter and the car just stopped. He jumped out and began to run down the street, over a brick wall, into someone's front garden, and up an apple tree. He turned around to find the gorilla right behind him beating its chest.
The man jumped down and ran back into the street screaming, until it became dark and he thought he'd lost the gorilla. The man ran into an alleyway then, suddenly, he saw a giant shadow coming down the street ahead. It was the gorilla!
This time there was no escape. As the gorilla neared him, the man began to feel faint. The giant beast came face to face with him, slowly raised its mighty hand and said, "Tag! You're it!"
Received from Mikala.
(_:][:_)
Top Ten Things You Don't Want to Hear During Surgery
10. Whoops! Somebody grab that ... we may need to put it back in later.
9. Spike! Spike! Come back with that! Bad dog! Bad, bad dog!
8. Is that supposed to be there? The book said it should be on the other side.
7. Sterile, schmerile.
6. That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?
5. Gosh, if this works, I hope they name the procedure after me!
4. Okay, we're ready for the transplant, wheel in the pig.
3. Don't worry, I think it's sharp enough.
2. No, don't throw that away, we'll probably need it for the autopsy.
AND THE NUMBER ONE THING YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR DURING SURGERY?
1. Can you stop that thing from beating? It's throwing my concentration off.
Received from Doc's Daily Chuckle.
(_:][:_)
Magnet
A teacher gave her class of second graders a lesson on the magnet and what it does.
The next day in a written test, she included this question: "My full name has six letters. The first one is M. I am strong and attractive. I pick up things. What am I?"
When the test papers were turned in, the teacher was astonished to find that almost 50 percent of the students answered the question with the word "Mother."
Received from Doc's Daily Chuckle.
(_:][:_)
To Mothers
This is for the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in their arms, wiping up barf laced with Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry Kool-Aid saying, "It's okay, honey, Mommy's here."
Who have sat in rocking chairs for hours on end soothing crying babies who can't be comforted.
This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their hair and milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purses.
For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween costumes. And all the mothers who DON'T.
This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see. And the mothers who took those babies and gave them homes.
This is for the mothers whose priceless art collections are hanging on their refrigerator doors.
And for all the mothers who froze their buns on metal bleachers at football or soccer games instead of watching from the warmth of their cars.
And that when their kids asked, "Did you see me, Mom?" they could say, "Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the world," and meant it.
This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store and swat them in despair when they stomp their feet and scream for ice cream before dinner. And for all the mothers who count to ten instead, but realize how child abuse happens.
This is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and explained all about making babies. And for all the (grand)mothers who wanted to, but just couldn't find the words.
This is for all the mothers who go hungry, so their children can eat.
For all the mothers who read "Goodnight, Moon" twice a night for a year. And then read it again. "Just one more time."
This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their shoelaces before they started school. And for all the mothers who opted for Velcro instead.
This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their daughters to sink a jump shot.
This is for every mother whose head turns automatically when a little voice calls "Mom?" in a crowd, even though they know their own offspring are at home -- or even away at college or have their own families.
This is for all the mothers who sent their kids to school with stomach aches, assuring them they'd be just FINE once they got there, only to get calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please pick them up. Right away.
This is for mothers whose children have gone astray, who can't find the words to reach them.
For all the mothers who bite their lips until they bleed when their 14-year-olds dye their hair green.
For all the mothers of the victims of recent school shootings, and the mothers of those who did the shootings.
For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of their TVs in horror, hugging their children who just came home from school safely.
This is for all the mothers who taught their children to be peaceful, and now pray they come home safely from a war.
What makes a good mother anyway? Is it patience? Compassion? Broad hips? The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time?
Or is it in her heart?
Is it the ache you feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time?
The jolt that takes you from sleep to dread, from bed to crib at 2 A.M. to put your hand on the back of a sleeping baby?
The panic, years later, that comes again at 2 A.M. when you just want to hear their key in the door and know they are safe again in your home?
Or the need to flee from wherever you are and hug your child when you hear news of a fire, a car accident, a child dying?
The emotions of motherhood are universal and so our thoughts are for young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep deprivation... And mature mothers learning to let go.
For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers.
Single mothers and married mothers.
Mothers with money, mothers without.
This is for you all. For all of us...
Hang in there. In the end we can only do the best we can.
Tell them every day that we love them. And pray and never stop being a mom.
Please pass along to all the moms in your life.
"Home is what catches you when you fall - and we all fall."
Please pass this to a wonderful mother you know. (I just did!)
Received from FranCMT2.
(_:][:_)
Peace and Quiet
Aunt Karen is the mother of two high-spirited young girls.
When I called her one morning, our conversation was constantly interrupted by the din of kids screaming and chasing each other. "Could you hold on for a moment?" my aunt finally asked, putting down the phone.
Within ten seconds all I could hear was absolute silence.
Then, "Okay, I'm back."
"But it's so quiet!" I exclaimed. "You must have complete control over those two."
"Not really," my aunt confessed wearily. "I'm in the
closet."
Received from Steve Brundage, Reader's Digest.
(_:][:_)
The Chief
"Next," the conference emcee announced, "we have the chief of the Minnesota State Patrol, Roger Ledding, who is here with his lovely wife, Beverly."
The chief took his place at the lectern. "I'm a little nervous," he began, "getting up before this distinguished audience and speaking today. But not nearly as nervous as I will be tonight when I must go home with my wife, Audrey, and explain Beverly to her!"
Received from Steve Sanderson.
(_:][:_)
Uncle Ted
Billy's homework assignment is to think of a true story with a moral so he goes home and thinks about it all night and finally has one.
The following day, Suzy raises her hand first and says, "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road."
The teacher asks for the moral to the story. Suzy replies, "Don't put all your eggs in one basket."
Next is Lucy. "Well, my dad owns a farm, too, and every weekend we take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only 8 of the 12 eggs hatched. The moral is, don't count your chicks before they are hatched.''
Billy is last to speak. He says, ''My uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam War. His plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed, with only a parachute, a bottle of bourbon, a machine gun, and a machete. As he floated down he drank the bottle of bourbon. Unfortunately, he landed right in the middle of 100 North Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but ran out of bullets so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. The blade broke on his machete, so he killed the last 10 with his bare hands.''
The teacher looks in shock at Billy and asks if there is possibly any moral to his story.
Billy replies, "Don't mess with my Uncle Ted when he's been drinking.''
Received from Mikala.
(_:][:_)
Elk Hunting
Bubba and Jake chartered a plane with a pilot to drop them off in the wilds of Alaska for a week of elk hunting, just the same as they did the year before.
When the pilot returned with the plane, Bubba exclaimed joyfully to the pilot, "We had a great hunting trip! We bagged four elk!"
The pilot regretfully explained, "Unfortunately, our plane can only fly with the weight of two elk. You'll have to leave the other two behind."
Bubba and Jake were both infuriated and insistent. "We won't allow you to fly this plane out without all four elk," Jake demanded.
The eager-to-please pilot relented and the plane took off with the three of them and their four elk. About fifteen minutes into the flight, the engine started to sputter, and within seconds they were hurtling to the ground.
Wearily arising from the wreckage, Bubba looked at Jake and wheezed, "Do you have any idea where we are?"
Jake, quite pleased with himself, replied, "Yes! We're about a mile from where we crashed last year."
Received from ArcaMax Jokes.
(_:][:_)
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Column - -
http://www.madkane.com/humor_blog/
Limerick Rose
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman quite often arose
From a difficult yoga-like pose
And, groaning, would claim:
“That position might maim,
But while in it, I manage to doze.”
© Madeleine Begun Kane. All Rights Reserved.
http://www.madkane.com/
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Candy joke:
Q: what country did candy come from?
A: sweeten
Cooking joke:
Q: why are cooks so cruel?
A: because they beat the eggs and whip the cream.
Vegetable joke:
Q: how do you fix a broken pizza?
A: with tomato paste.
Chocolate joke:
Q: how can you keep from getting a sharp pain in your eye when you drink chocolate milk?
A: take the spoon out of the glass.
Dieting joke:
Q: what do seven day of dieting do?
A: they make one weak (week).
http://foodanddrinkhumor.freeservers.com/whats_new.html
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"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." __ Franklin D. Roosevelt
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. _ _ George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" _ _ Queen E. Watson
“A political class of Republicans and Democrats that look after themselves, not the Nation. A media hostile to the very precepts of this nation. A generation of Americans who see morals as vices, and are ignorant of America's Actual History.”
"The things that will destroy America are prosperity-at-any-price, peace-at-any-price, safety-first instead of duty-first, the love of soft living, and the get-rich-quick theory of life." - - Theodore Roosevelt
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234_5655
(Non _ Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance _ 234_7371 (24 Hour)
Jail _ 234_5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control _ 800_222_1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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Interested in getting in touch with the Banner_News through e_mail? editor@bannernews.net For the editor, news@bannernews.net For news and sports items, Coming Events, Diary, Church News, school and civic events. [http://www.bannernews.net/]
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"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." __ "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" __ "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." __ "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." _ _ "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." _ _ Paul Troquille
“Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est.” Knowledge is power. _ Francis Bacon
"The problem is here and now. The time for talk is past. The time for action is now."
Comments on the first Earth Day _ James F. McClellan via John "Fuzzy" Thurman
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" __"Bug"
God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT_I KC5HII
P. S. If you'd like to be added to the distribution, just drop us E_mail at kc5hii@suddenlink.net
. We offer "Da Bleat" as text, a "Blog" and as a newsletter with pictures in Word and PDF format. The latest issue is usually updated sometime Saturday. For the latest issue, go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com. We also have a site [http://bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com/] where we post photos that I like.
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