Saturday, June 15, 2013

Bug's Bleat - - GCF: American Idol


My dad, James Curtis McClellan about 1949.






















"Bug Eaters" Da Boys ate Crickets and Mealy Worms at LoGoLy Day Camp.


















LifeNet preparing to transport a patient from MRMC.













This years "Flower Bed" in the Magnolia Gardens.



















Annette studying for her sermon at Wade Prison Monday.



















Shelling fresh Pinto Beans.



















James Watson (Tamey) Duke with David on the steam engine that once set in the park east of Lewisville.


















Volume 15, Issue 24 Friday, June 14, 2013

Hello ALL,

It’s been a GREAT week with our two youngest grandsons here to attend LoGoLy State Park Day Camp [http://www.arkansasstateparks.com/events/discovery-day-camp-session-ii-85759/#.UbuKr9jp-BI]. It’s a change of our routine (i.e. Up at the crack of mid morning, preparing breakfast for two little locust (well, having McDonald’s prepare it when we oversleep.) Getting them to McNeil with their lunches and binoculars and “Willies” (to wear in the mud), etc.) But, it’s worth it having two fantastic kids around the house.
Now, if we can just survive until their dad gets here to pick them up … then it will be nap time till about Sunday morning.
~~~~~
Earlier I referred to Da Boys as being locust. Knowing this description to be relatively accurate, we prepared for their visit by stocking extra food for them. We brought in enough food to feed the four of us for the entire week and not require that we eat out (except when we overslept and had to go by McDonalds for breakfast.)

As it turned out, we had a Drs Appointment in Little Rock Monday so Jimmy took them to LoGoLy that day and dropped them off again at the park Tuesday morning. We picked them up from the park that afternoon, so they didn’t come over till Tuesday afternoon. As a consequence we didn’t have them eating at our home as many days as we’d planned for.

Grandparent will completely understand the following true statement.

We had to go back to the grocery store after the boys left for the Park Wednesday morning, because our cupboards were bare.
~~~~~
When Annette and I got married, I was surprised that “our” grocery bill was about 400% higher than “my” grocery bill had been. This was especially puzzling since we were in that first phase of marriage where you don’t want to be caught using the bathroom, much less eating a lot. In fact, Annette would let me eat as much as I desired each evening. (At least she did until she realized that she was facing death by starvation unless she started getting some food before I cleaned out every food container on the table.)

So, I couldn’t figure out why we were spending so much money on groceries since we were basically eating the same types of meals that I had been preparing as a bachelor (with the exception that Annette did cook “cleaner” than I did. For instance, she didn’t throw spaghetti on the wall to see if it was done.) Finally, we started spending less at the grocery store every two weeks. And I got up the courage to ask Annette why we’d been spending so much previously. She explained that her mother had never let her cook and the only way she knew to learn was “trial and error.” Her method consisted of cooking meals until she had one that was eatable. The previous attempts each day ended up in the apartment trash bin.

Hindsight being 20/20, maybe it would have been cheaper to enroll her in cooking school. On the other hand, I doubt any regular school I could have afforded could have turned out a cook as accomplished as her trial and error method did.
~~~~~
Speaking of seeing the doctor Monday, got a pretty good report from Dr. Mendelsohn. My "weird" blood seems to be moving toward more normal readings for the first time since he started treating me in 1987. It's still weird, just not as much so. He thinks I may be growing a replacement spleen. It's unusual but he's seen it in a few cases and he told me; "you're just weird enough to be doing it." Also ... since I'm no longer having to take EPO, I'm no longer ineligible for the Olympics (because I was taking a banned performance enhancing drug.) :-) God Is Good.
~~~~~
Cheap Chinese Cocoanuts - - This week we decided to expand our pantry with some Coconut Milk. Annette picked up a couple of cans at Sam’s and “we” tried some. Annette went first and experimented with a little Coconut milk “straight up.” She commented that it wasn’t exactly a pleasant experience. So, I decided to put a little in my coffee. … The result was, well, less than satisfying.

So, the coconut milk sat in the frig for a day or so when Jimmy dropped the boys off for a visit. We were having a good time when Vanessa came by to pick them up. But first, she went into the “office” to visit with her mother. While there, she called for the boys to please bring her a glass of milk.

Now Vanessa loves Dairy and usually has a Big Tea Glass full of cold milk when she partakes.

A light went off in the prank section of my brain and I told Josiah and Ethan that we had some “special” milk for their mom. I got out the jar of coconut milk, filled up a glass and gave it to Josiah for delivery to his mom.

By this time, both boys had tumbled to the fact that a prank of some type was in the works. Josiah did a magnificent job of delivering the glass to his mom with a straight face while Ethan and I huddled in the kitchen, waiting.

We didn’t have to wait long. Vanessa took a very healthy drink of what she thought was regular skim milk and had swallowed a significant amount before realizing that something was wrong, very wrong. Her exclamations, sputtering and general distress resulted in loud laughs from the boys who immediately ratted me out as the creator of this prank.
~
When I related this story to Keith Burton, I also commented that it was a mystery to me how folks could brag about Coconut milk when it’s taste was so far from what we classified as good. He told me that fresh coconut milk was good and the problem with this product was probably due to it being from “Cheap Chinese Coconuts.” He’s probably right.
~~~~~
This week I heard that it’s everyone’s “right” to have dental and health insurance. I wish we’d known that when we were first married. That was back in the day that we had to save up for a year to go to the drive-in movie on “Dollar Night.”

When Annette found out she was pregnant with Vanessa (though in those days you didn’t know the sex or much else about the baby until they were born,) we had insurance but it didn’t cover pregnancy (such coverage would have more than doubled our monthly premiums.) So … she cut a deal with Dr. Ruff to “Lay Away” this pregnancy. In exchange for regular weekly payments to the doctor and hospital we got Annette’s regular “Prenatal” exams as well as the hospital delivery.

Of course, her “deal” only covered routine pregnancy costs. Any complications or extras would be billed to us separately.

So you can understand how nervous I was getting after she’d been in hard labor, at the hospital for over 20 hours. If she went over a day in the labor room, we’d be billed for the second day.

Fortunately, in spite of our new baby being a “breech” delivery, she delivered Vanessa Anne McClellan 23 hours and 45 minutes after being admitted. At least that’s what they told me. I had passed out at about the 23 hour and 35 minute mark, as they were moving her into the delivery room.
~~~~~
I was fortunate to have a father, a step father, numerous uncles (and cousins) and our Heavenly Father to raise me. My father, James Curtis McClellan, worked in the oil field seven days a week but still found time to show his love to me. Even though he died when I was only four, I have several memories:
Sitting on the friendly bar counter eating peanuts while my dad had a beer (and had the riot act read to him when my mom found out he’d taken her son to a “den of inequity.”)
Standing on a hill east of where big green earth movers were building the earthen dam to form Lake Earling.
Playing in the cab of a road grader that was parked in a field (the current location of the Taylor Post office) across the street from our house in Taylor.
Waiting in the car with my mom for my dad to shut the rig down so I could scurry up the tall stair case to get my reward (a dollar) for daring to challenge the big noisy beast that was a hard working oil drilling rig.
Sitting in my dad’s lap, watching the late movie on Chanel 12 (one of the two channels we got at that time.)
Waking up in my bed in Taylor after going to sleep on a pallet at my Aunt Jerry and Uncle Paul’s house. My dad had missed me and driven to Bussey to get me in the middle of the night.
~
My stepdad, James Watson Duke” also worked seven days a week, in the Chatterbox restaurant where he fed many of the oil field workers.
His generosity to me began when my mother was working for him and we still lived with my grandmother in Taylor.
He made a sizable donation to the Boys Club so I could become a charter member even though I didn’t live in Magnolia.
He also got me a library card at the Magnolia Library so I could get books there instead of waiting on the red and white bookmobile to come to Taylor.
He taught me to cook a hamburger (don’t squeeze the meat and only flip it once and, of course, toast the bun on the grill. Take the meat and the bun off at the same time and put the cheese on the meat to let it melt “naturally.”)
He taught me to serve the public efficiently with a smile and without complaint unless their sin was too great and to then prosecute them to the fullest extent of the law.
He introduced me to the Texas Eagle, the Missouri Pacific passenger train running from San Antonio to Chicago which we rode to St. Louis every year to see the Cardinals play and to Chicago and New York to National Restaurant Shows when he was a vice-president of that association.
While traveling, he took us to the best restaurants (where we all had to order something different so we could all taste a wide range of recipes and that’s the reason to this day I break out in a cold sweat if any two people in my party order the same thing.)
He took us to Broadway shows (i.e. Destry Rides Again, Camelot, Sound of Music, South Pacific, The Music Man, etc.)
And, when Annette and I married, he included my family in his care for me.
~~~~~
In spite of what we think, we are really never truly alone. Most of us have family, friends, co workers, neighbors, etc. who actually do care about us. I know it’s not “in vogue” but it truly does take a village to raise a child. And it takes a village to maintain a life, even after we’re grown. We’re human and American and that means that we instinctively look out for each other.

Of course, I don’t have any empirical facts for this. Just my own observations and experiences. A couple stand out;

After my dad passed away, my mother became the “Do Gooder” of Taylor, Arkansas. If someone needed to be taken to the hospital, she loaded them up and we took them. If someone didn’t come home, we went to Springhill, found them, sobered them up (she held the coffee and I held the tomato juice) and brought them home.

And growing up on Hearn Street in Taylor, my cousins and I were cared for by our parents, Aunts, Uncles, neighbors, the local shop keepers, police, etc. In fact, years later my cousin Polly would share just how secure she felt growing up cared for by the community. Some coworkers were discussing how emotionally hard and psychologically scarring their child hoods had been. When they looked to Polly to commensurate with them she had to say that growing up on Hearn Street in Taylor, AR she never knew of abuse or fear.

We were watching an Anthology “Garrison Keillor: The Man on the Radio in the Red Shoes” today. I really like “A Prairie Home Companion” and I like Garrison Keillor. Even though he’s what us fundamentalist conservatives call a “Flaming Liberal.” I wanted to share a bit of one of his monologs that I believe explains why most of us have more in common than we have in difference.
~
“… the public school was one of those places. In Anoka, Minnesota some children wound up going to Dartmouth or Stanford or Carlton or Princeton but they spent their formative years in the public schools with the children of farmers, and carpenters and cops and firemen. They all rode together on the big yellow school bus and they cheered for the teams and ate macaroni and cheese in the lunchroom, a valuable experience that gives you a tribal feeling.

Minnesota is a place where if you ask an audience to stand up and sing, they’re gonna do it. They were brought up to. Like the Star Spangled Banner, which like our system of government, is much maligned and badly abused but if you put it in the right key, which is the key of G, it works pretty well and it’s very moving.

People get so much of their politics listening to other people rant and rave on the radio, sitting alone in their car or reading somebody’s blog, and the Star Spangled Banner is one of those rare moments when we sing a song together, which means more for all of us joining in. We share a common tongue and a fondness for jokes, a love of American landscape and we are a union.”
~~~~~
A friend of ours asked; “Somebody answer my question, please....Why would Edward Snowden have to stand trial for exposing "illegal" acts done to American citizens, by our government?”

I have VERY strong mixed feelings. On the one hand, I'm glad that this program (which we all assumed the NSA was doing) was publicly "called out." On the other hand, this man set himself up as judge, jury, etc. and opened up our intelligence operations to the world. What really disturbs me is that he "fled" to China to escape prosecution. Do the Chinese now have everything he had about our intelligence capabilities? They say not. Who believes that?????

HWP commented: “I can agree with you James, this is a very questionable area and We The People need a long discussion and debate regarding this issue. (We actually should've had it a long time ago. In our gut we've known it had to be going on, just didn't want to believe it!)”

I think Benjamin Franklin said it best: "Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a little Temporary Safety deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."
~
I've felt this way since the Uniting (and) Strengthening America (by) Providing Appropriate Tools Required (to) Intercept (and) Obstruct Terrorism Act of 2001 was passed.
~~~~~

Listen to the oppressed crowd.

Enjoy their joy.

Those were the days before that Tuesday morning.

Those were the days before those neocon lies.

Those were the days before Barack Obama droned civilians to death with his Terror Tuesday meetings.

Those were the days when drones were male honey bees.

Listen to the crowd.

"Born in the U.S.A."

Behind the Berlin Wall.

Victims challenging the communist security police officers spying on their prey.

"Born in the U.S.A!"

Back then, America was the spiritual beacon of hope, instead of the marauding crusader of change she is in our post-9/11 world.

Those were the days.

And, now, somewhere out there, a Russian, French, Indian, Japanese, South Korea, Latin American, Australian, or maybe even a North Korean young artist, is composing the next "Born in the U.S.A."

But will he or she be as welcome in America to perform as Bruce Springsteen was welcome behind the Berlin Wall in 1988? ...

[http://open.salon.com/blog/danielkronlid/2013/06/14/does_that_star-spangled_banner_still_wave]
~~~~~
“When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you until it seems that you cannot hold on for a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time when the tide will turn.” - Harriet Beecher Stowe, born June 14, 1811
~
Today in History, Jun 14,

1642 - 1st compulsory education law in America passed by Massachusetts

1775 - US Army founded

1777: Congress adopts the Stars and Stripes replacing Grand Union flag

1917 – 1st German air attack on England, 100+ killed in East-London

1940 - Auschwitz concentration camp opens (3 million killed there)

1942 - Anne Frank begins her diary

1944 - 1st B-29 raid against mainland Japan

1951 - 1st commercial computer, UNIVAC 1, enters service at Census Bureau

1954 - Pres Eisenhower signs order adding words "under God" to the Pledge

1959 – Disneyland Monorail System, the first daily operating monorail system in the Western Hemisphere, opens to the public in Anaheim, California.

1963 - Valery Bykovsky in Vostok 5 orbits earth 81 times in 5 days

1984 - Southern Baptist convention decide on no women clergy members

2012 - The world's first stem-cell assisted vein transplant is undertaken by Swedish doctors on a 10 year old girl

~~~~~
Arkansas Governor Mike Beebe has ordered that the United States and Arkansas flags be flown at half-staff Saturday, June 15, to honor United States Army Specialist Robert Allan Pierce of Huntington, who died June 3, while serving his country in Afghanistan.
~~~~~
My young classmate, Martha Chapman, shared this with us. Her comment; “This is so true- what to do- what to do-”
~
The Terrible Tragedy of the Healthy Eater - - August 1, 2012 by Erica •

“I know you. We have a lot in common. You have been doing some reading and now you are pretty sure everything in the grocery store and your kitchen cupboards is going to kill you. …”

For the rest of the EXCELLENT article, go to; 1http://www.nwedible.com/2012/08/tragedy-healthy-eater.html
~~~~~
As a big fan of photography and trains, I was excited to learn of the work of Gary Knapp on "Tracks Ahead" this week. He's doing incredible work with trains in iconic settings at night. [http://www.ourherald.com/news/2010-11-18/Front_Page/f05.html] To see more Gary Knapp work just Google “gary knapp night trains”. [http://www.railpictures.net/showphotos.php?userid=7962]
~~~~~
The news of fatal explosions at two south Louisiana Manufacturing Plants this week could cause us to conclude that working in a chemical plant is a dangerous occupation, but statistics say otherwise.

There were 25 fatalities in chemical manufacturing plants nationwide in 2011, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. That's a fatality rate of 1.9 per 100,000 full-time workers, barely half the rate among all workers.

Nationwide, 3.8 of every 100 full-time workers was injured in 2011, according to the U.S. Occupational Safety and Health Administration. The injury rate was 2.4 in the overall chemical manufacturing sector, and 0.6 in the area of chemical manufacturing including the Williams plant. That's among the very lowest injury rate of any manufacturing sector.

Don’t get me wrong, any fatalities are way way too many ... but the fact that two explosions resulted in such a low number of fatal injuries is a testament to the plant and community emergency plans and teams. The reports from these incidents reveal a great deal of planning for and a professional job of responding to these incidents
~~~~~
Latest Posting in "Praying For Melinda"
Jodi is at family camp this week so I will do my own updating. She will straighten me out if she thinks I didn't do it right I am sure. Wayne and I just got in from Houston. I didn't show out this time. lol. Everything went well. Now that I am not eligible for the trial anymore (since I reacted to one of the drugs-cetuximab) the plan is still to continue on with the other two, Avastin and Torisel (this is the one that has to be paid for out of pocket).I will have two more weeks of treatment then they will do scans to see if the treatment is doing any good without the third drug. We are on Plan B now, I don't know how many more plans the doctors can come up with but I still have faith God has a plan of His own. I appreciate all the prayers, support, and donations
(https://www.giveforward.com/fundraiser/jcf2/healing-for-melinda?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=fb_share_stream.share&utm_campaign=vanity_page_T1&og_action=hug&t=3&fb_ref=1052547)

Words are just not enough but that is all I have. God bless you all.
~~~~~
John and Teresa Britton are Chi Alpha Campus Ministries Missionaries in Stillwater, OK. If you have a giving heart, I recommend supporting this Mission. They do a great job spiritually feeding college students and ... they also do a great job helping college students with their physical needs.

When they were at SAU in Magnolia I often saw them inviting students to their home, and helping students with just about any problem you can imagine college students encounter. John and Teresa also are very hard workers in the local church. We're really missing them in Magnolia since they moved to OK.

John Britton - - Check out our page at AG U.S. Missions web site: http://usmissions.ag.org/resources/locator_02.cfm?Display=Yes&churchdetail=AGHM4015
~~~~~
Every New Christian (and most older ones) should attend a Discipleship school like "In Christ" Bible School that MCC used to sponsor.
This is a GREAT way for young Christians who they are "In Christ." The curriculum is simple but very very deep.

1. Someone to be responsible (notice I didn't say subservient) to.
2. An education in who we are In Christ.

We graduated many folks from MCCs "In Christ" Bible school over the years. I wish it was still holding classes.
~~~~~
Magnolia's Farmers Market. Opens at 7:00 am. Usually sold out by 8 to 8:30 am. Tuesdays and Thursdays And Saturday

Emerson Farmers Market at the Emerson United Methodist Church. Is open Tuesdays and Fridays. 7 am till... (usually 8 or 8:30)
~~~~~
Favorite Quotes:

A lot of people criticize the primaries, but I think they are absolutely essential to the education of the President of the United States.

I've had at least my share of tragedy, but I have had far more than my share of happiness.

Believe me, as one who has seen a number of international crises firsthand, they cannot be handled without an understanding of history.

A lot of people criticize the primaries, but I think they are absolutely essential to the education of the President of the United States.

Pierre Salinger
~
You don't have to hit bottom for God to show you His way. But it's easier to see what's really going on when you have no where to look but up.

James F. McClellan
~~~~~
The following wisdom is shared by our friends.
~
Focus on individuals—avoid the herding. Jesus went searching for the one.
We become focused on the BIG picture (the forest) and we lose sight of the trees (individuals). Ministry is not ONLY about the BIG picture, it is also – and most specifically – about the individual. Disciples are not created in herds. Disciples are created as individuals (Great Commission)
Taken from Brian Dollar's blog--Kid's minister

Mary Louise Brownlee Alexis
~
Be prepared when you pull your refrigerator out from the wall- you will NOT like what you see!

Martha Chapman
~
The moon smiling down on me tonight doesn't affect me that much. It's when it points at me and laughs that I get mad.

If your job is to tell me how to do my job, you should at least know how to do my job.

The Obama administration would NEVER use the NSA's electronic intelligence schemes to garner information for political gain. I mean, it's not like the NSA is the State Department, the Justice Department, the FBI, or the IRS for Pete's sake.

Chuck Jackson
~
Don't escape from your long preparation, see!! we what easy and fast, pop out like popcorn what if it will take 30 years for preparation will You stay In? , "Preaching to myself".

Titus Kasomo
~
I think the heat has zapped all my energy today

Today, take the time to look around you, and recognize what you have to be thankful for. Now do you really think YOU did all that by yourself?

Never let a day go by without telling your loved ones how important they are to you. None of us are promised tomorrow.

Nancee Davis Law
~
The presence of outstanding strengths presupposes that energy needed in other areas has been channeled away from them. -Allen Shawn

Why is it that missionaries are applauded for speaking the language of and using the best of their host culture to express the Gospel, but if an American church does the same thing we are "watering down the gospel"? Jesus is coming. Let's win this generation!

Jimmy Malone
~
The best part about being over 40 is we did most of our stupid stuff before the internet!

Bobbie McClellan
~
Wake up Wake Up America! .... Cause it's gonna be a great day!!!!

Anita Heath McNatt
~
You know how when your parents would leave, they'd give 1000 instructions? I Thess. 5 reminds me of that. Here's a few of those instructions. Live in peace with each other, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient, do good, rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks...the list goes on. You know, focusing on these each day, and making it our business to be about the Father's business, we'd be too busy to mind other folks' business...just a happy "Friday" thought!

Debbie Troquille
~
"One ship sails East, And another West, by the self-same winds that blow.’Tis the set of the sails And not the gales, that tells the way we go. Like the winds of the sea are the waves of time, as we journey along through life. 'Tis the set of the soul, that determines the goal, and not the calm or the strife." Shared from Richard Remington

Paul David Troquille
~
If you've left a voice mail on my cell phone in the last two weeks, and I didn't call back, sorry about that. I got ALL those messages at once - today.

Joe Tudor
~
Great day in Honduras today--last day of OBS with EIM. Many lives were changed, including mine! God showed out once again!

Tim Wooley
~~~~~
AskBob - - Bob Rankin - - Geekly Update - 12 June 2013

Is the Verizon 'Share Everything' plan really a secret deal to let the Feds snoop into your phone records? Is Motorola's new wearable tech a digital convenience, or the Mark of the Beast? And how many calories are in that avocado, anyway? Get answers to these burning questions, and the scoop on the latest tech news, in this edition of the Geekly Update. It's guaranteed to make you 146% smarter, read on...http://askbobrankin.com/geekly_update_12_june_2013.html?awt_l=HZr.N&awt_m=IzrcKtl.Z8P6SL
~~~~~
ACC SmartBrief - - Sen. Murkowski sees Senate taking up energy-efficiency bill soon

The Senate could begin tackling the Shaheen-Portman energy-efficiency bill after wrapping up debates on immigration policy, said Sen. Lisa Murkowski, R-Alaska. "What we need to do is nail down the universe of amendments that we can present [and] basically have a game plan to go forward," Murkowski said. "Call me optimistic, because A, it's good legislation, B, it's bipartisan, and C, it's just the right thing to do to advance energy legislation. It's long overdue." FuelFix.com (6/12) http://fuelfix.com/blog/2013/06/12/murkowski-energy-efficiency-bill-will-advance-on-capitol-hill/
~~~~~
DarynKagan.com - - I have for you today empowered actresses, a lesson in love, & kids getting perspective on what's important.

Enjoy!
-Daryn.

Over-40 Actresses Getting Some Sweet Revenge In Hollywood #Rewriting The Rules!
http://darynkagan.com/Celebs___Artists.html

Unusual Place For Marriage Proposal #Motion Approved!
http://darynkagan.com/Love_Stories.html

Dad Fights Spoiled Kids; Teens Make 33,000 Burritos!
http://darynkagan.com/Charity.html

Know anyone who would love to get this newsletter and brighten their day? Sign them up http://darynkagan.us6.list-manage1.com/subscribe?u=8fc852c2879912f2f334bb010&id=54f94ca479.
~~~~~
Diabetes Life - - www.dlife.com - - Weight Loss Surgery Series: Before, During, and After

Beginning the journey to bariatric surgery - - kalimah bioBy Kalimah Johnson

I have had a weight problem all of my life. Actually, my horrible eating habits — which contributed to my overall weight gain — http://www.dlife.com/diabetes-food-and-fitness/weight_management/weight_loss_surgery/kalimah_johnson/bariatric_surgery_part1?utm_source=Update-20130614&utm_medium=eNewsletter&utm_content=Update-newsletter&utm_campaign=dLife-eNewsletter&
~~~~~
5 Things New Veterans Expect From All Candidates


1. Defend the New GI Bill

2. Employ the New Greatest Generation

3. Prevent suicide among troops and veterans

4. Build a truly 21st Century VA

5. Improve Care for Female Veterans


http://iava.org/blog/5-things-new-veterans-expect-all-candidates-2012
~~~~~
The latest from Michael Yon, the foremost “milnews” blogger on the web.
~
Greetings,

Of interest on China and Okinawa.

Sentiment Builds in China to Press Claim for Okinawa

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/14/world/asia/sentiment-builds-in-china-to-press-claim-for-okinawa.html?ref=world&_r=0

Very Respectfully,
Michael Yon
Your Writer,

Please remember that this website accepts no advertisement and is dependent on your support.

PS Please sign up for my Twitter.com updates at "Michael_Yon" [http://twitter.com/Michael_Yon] (not Michael Yon).

http://www.facebook.com/#/MichaelYonFanPage?ref=sgm
~
www.michaelyon-online.com
~
Http://www.michaelyon_online.com/index.php
~~~~~
If you would like to encourage US Troops overseas, but are not sure just how to begin, visit www.anysoldier.com for ideas.
~~~~~
Please remember ... America is not at war. The U.S. Military is at war. America is at the MALL.
~~~~~
Rasmussin Reports - - June 14, 2013 - - Issue: 56

Distrust of Government Is What It's All About - - A Commentary By Scott Rasmussen

Another week, another controversy in official Washington.

At the moment, 35 percent of voters consider recently exposed National Security Agency surveillance efforts as the most serious. The Internal Revenue Service's targeting of conservatives is No. 2 on the list, followed by concerns about the Obama administration's handling of the incident in Benghazi last fall in which the U.S. ambassador to Libya was murdered. The Justice Department's secret probe of reporters' phone and email records is seen as the top concern by only 9 percent.

Competing for attention with the controversies are ongoing policy disputes over immigration, gun control and full implementation of the national health care law.

While each of these stories has its own cast of characters and internal dynamics, it is now possible to identify a unifying theme.

President Obama, whose deeply held faith in government is unwavering, unintentionally provided that moment of clarity last week. In attempting to dismiss concerns about the NSA disclosures, he said, "If people can't trust not only the executive branch but also don't trust Congress and don't trust federal judges to make sure that we're abiding by the Constitution with due process and rule of law, then we're going to have some problems here."

We have a problem.

Just 30 percent of voters nationwide have that much trust in government officials when it comes to these surveillance efforts.

Only 24 percent now are confident that the federal government does the right thing most of the time.

This popular distrust of government is the theme that ties all the recent news stories together. It's driving all the current policy debates.

On immigration, there is broad popular support for comprehensive immigration reform. Most Americans believe legal immigration is good for the country, but most do not trust the government to enforce any provisions in the new law that would improve border security and reduce illegal immigration. Only 7 percent believe that enforcement is "very likely" to happen.

This is not just Republicans grumbling about Barack Obama in the White House. The same skepticism was there when George W. Bush was president. Unless the government does something to address the border problem, it will be there for the next president, as well. Because of that distrust, prospects for passing serious immigration reform this year are slim indeed.

Similarly with gun control, Americans overwhelmingly like the idea of requiring background checks for those who want to purchase a gun, but they are very suspicious of where the president and New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg want to go from there. If voters were convinced their plan was for background checks and nothing more, it would have enjoyed broad popular support.

The president's health care law is facing the same challenge. New mandates will soon force people to buy more expensive insurance plans. Advocates say they're not really more expensive because they provide more coverage. But most Americans are uncomfortable with trusting the government to decide an appropriate level of coverage. They're also suspicious of all government cost estimates.

Many in Washington are frustrated by the public distrust. They dream of public relations programs to overcome it. What is needed, though, is for the government to change its behavior, so that it can earn the trust of the people it serves.

To find out more about Scott Rasmussen, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2013 - - SCOTT RASMUSSEN - - DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM

See Other Political Commentaries. http://www.rasmussenreports.com/public_content/political_commentary

See Other Commentaries by Scott Rasmussen. http://www.rasmussenreports.com/public_content/political_commentary/commentary_by_scott_rasmussen
~~~~~
"Today's Seed" from E-MIN - June 14, 2013


Today's message is an encore presentation of the Today's Seed message that was sent 14 years ago today, June 14, 1999.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Jesus said to the people who believed in him, "You are truly my disciples if you keep obeying my teachings. And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." "But we are descendants of Abraham," they said. "We have never been slaves to anyone on earth.
What do you mean, 'set free'?" Jesus replied, "I assure you that everyone who sins is a slave of sin. A slave is not a permanent member of the family, but a son is part of the family forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will indeed be free. (John 8:31-36 NLT)

Prayer: LORD, I am grateful that I have a place in the family of God that will not be taken away from me. No other person or creature can take it from me and You will not: You have made me Your child forever. I no longer have to be a slave to sin or anything else, but I am free in You. Thank You for making this freedom possible. Help me learn more of the Truth and what this means as I grow in You. In Jesus' name. Amen.
________________________________

Today's Seed is reader-supported. Please help us grow. Donate by check, card, & PayPal: www.e-min.org/give2.htm (Tax deductible)

Sign up to receive your own Today's Seed: www.e-min.org/msg.htm - -Share Today's Seed with family & friends: www.e-min.org/rects.htm Connect with Randall: www.facebook.com/RandallVaughnBooks or www.twitter.com/randallvaughn Get Randall's new book: My Lyrics, My Life https://www.createspace.com/4092337

Today's Seed by Randall Vaughn is published daily (M-F) by E-MIN Global Ministries, P O Box 220, Warrior, AL 35180 (USA) www.e-min.org Copyright Terms/Permissions/List Privacy www.e-min.org/tp.htm Today's Seed(TM) (c) 2012 Randall Vaughn All Rights Reserved Worldwide.
~~~~~
http://www.shelfari.com
http://www.shelfari.com/bugsbleat/shelf
~~~~~
Photos on the front of this week’s “Bleat” include - - My dad, James Curtis McClellan about 1949. "Bug Eaters" Da Boys ate Crickets and Mealy Worms at LoGoLy Day Camp. LifeNet preparing to transport a patient from MRMC. This year’s "Flower Bed" in the Magnolia Gardens. Annette studying for her sermon at Wade Prison Monday. Shelling fresh Pinto Beans. James Watson (Tamey) Duke with David on the steam engine that once set in the park east of Lewisville.
~~~~~

For the latest issue of "Da Bleat.", go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com.
Our photos are posted at http://www.bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com.
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
Thank You, Dad
Reflections on my Father
By: Chuck Colson

Hi, I’m John Stonestreet. As we get ready to buy our dads a tie for Father’s Day, let’s hear from our old friend Chuck Colson, who in this 2008 broadcast reflected on his dad.


As this Father’s Day approaches, I’ve been thinking a lot about my own dad, and how blessed I was to have him in my life. I was born during the Depression; by today’s standards, I guess you’d say we grew up in fairly deprived circumstances. I just didn’t know it.

I remember that Dad wasn't around much when I was growing up. He had to drop out of high school when he was a young man to support his family after his father died. So by the time I arrived, he was working full-time at a job, and going to accounting school—and later law school—at night—12 years in total.

One of my earliest childhood memories was my parents taking food to neighbors who had less than we did; and my mother taking me on the subway to meet my dad coming out of law school at nine o’clock at night. Then we’d accompany him home, but not before stopping for an ice cream.

As I reflect on it, I think I developed my work ethic during those days. When I got out of the Marine Corps, I thought nothing about working full-time and going to school four years at night to get my law degree. After all, my dad had set the example. Maybe one of the best days for my dad, and for me, was when I was admitted to the bar in Massachusetts and made a copy of the certificate, mailing it to my dad with a note on it saying, “Without you I could never have done this.”

My dad worked so hard that I was accustomed to only spending time with him on Sunday afternoons. We'd sit on the back porch, and there was never any wasted time. My dad would drill lessons into my head: Always do an honest day’s work for an honest day’s pay; be willing to do anything you’re required to do (that came in handy, by the way, when I had to clean toilets in Marine training); and always tell the truth. Well, I testified 44 times under oath during Watergate, and was never once accused of perjury.

But if anybody accused me of self-righteousness, I would have to stand convicted. When I got to the White House, I was meticulous about avoiding conflicts of interest: I’d put everything I owned in trusts. I wouldn't see former clients. But I ended up in prison. Self-righteousness is a form of pride.

One of the toughest things I ever experienced was stopping by my dad’s hospital room on my way to prison. It was an emotional time, but at least I was able to witness to him about Christ. I won’t know until I get to heaven what came of it. And my worst day followed that, when I learned, in prison, that my dad had died. I had to attend the funeral under armed guard.

But one thing I knew for sure—and I knew it even as I grieved at my father’s funeral: Dad had poured everything he had into me—and into his grandkids, who became the joy of his life. And he lived his life with great honor and dignity.

All I can hope is that the same will be said of me some day by my children and grandchildren. I knew every minute my dad was proud of me—and I was proud of him.

I told him how I felt many times when he was alive. But on reflection, I wish I’d told him more often. So, don’t miss the opportunity this Father’s Day to tell your father how much you love him and appreciate him. Or, if he's gone, as my father is, at least give a prayer of thanks to God that you had the dad you did.

(This commentary is re-aired from June 13, 2008).

Further Reading and Information

Take action Thank You, Dad: Reflections on my Father - Next Steps

On this Father’s Day, pick up the phone, mail a card, thank your dad for the time he devoted to you. In instances where relationships are strained, take the first step to reconcile with your father even in small ways like simply sending a quick note and breaking the silence. Where communication is completely cut off, pray for your father.
If you get a chance, check out the book The Blessing by Gary Smalley and John Trent about how to improve broken family relationships and heal any past wounds with your father. Find other great books on fatherhood listed below.


Books:

The Blessing
Gary Smalley | Pocket Books | November 1990
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=0671737430

First Time Dad: The Stuff You Really Need to Know
John Fuller | Moody Publishers | May 2011
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=9780802487506

You Have What It Takes: What Every Father Needs to Know
John Eldredge | Nelson Books | March 2007
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=0785288767

Point Man: How a Man Can Lead His Family
Steve Farrar | Multnomah Publishers | April 2003
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=1590521269

Quiet Strength: The Principles, Practices, and Priorities of a Winning Life
Tony Dungy | Tyndale House | May 2008
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=1414318022

Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: 10 Secrets Every Father Should Know
Meg Meeker |Regnery Publishing | September 2006
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=1596980125

Tales from the Dad Side: Misadventures in Fatherhood
Steve Doocy | Harper Paperback | 2008
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=9780061441639

What Every Man Wishes His Father Had Told Him
Byron Forrest Yawn | Harvest House Publishers | February 2012
http://www.colsoncenterstore.org/product.asp?sku=9780736946384

[http://www.breakpoint.org/bpcommentaries]
Copyright © 2013 Colson Center. All Rights Reserved

~~~~~
Residents of Columbia County, Arkansas are represented in Congress by:
~

Senator John Boozman (R_ AR)
1 Russell Courtyard
Washington DC, 20510
Phone: 202-224-4843
http://boozman.senate.gov/
~
Senator Mark Pryor (D_ AR)
Phone 202_224_2353
FAX 202_228_0908
http://pryor.senate.gov/
~
Representative Tom Cotton (R )
Phone 202_225_3772
FAX 202_225_1314
http://cotton.house.gov/

Other states congresspersons can be found at: [http://www.visi.com/juan/congress/]
~~~~~
THOUGHT OF THE DAY:

"Live a balanced life. Learn some and think some, and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some." - Robert Fulghum

"If I'd known I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself!" - Eubie Blake

"How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives." - Annie Dillard

"Fair winds and following seas and long may your big jib draw!" - Naval Blessing

"Anger as soon as fed is dead / 'Tis starving makes it fat." - Emily Dickinson

"The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them." - Mark Twain

"There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." - Oscar Wilde
~~~~~
Breaking Christian News

Patriots' Owner: Tebow Was Signed on Because of His "Spirituality"
News Staff (Jun 13, 2013)

Patriots' owner Robert Kraft announced that Tim Tebow was signed on recently, in part, because Kraft was concerned about a lack of spirituality on his football team.

http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=11797

~

30th Abortion Clinic CLOSED in 2013, after Botched Abortions, Patient Death
Operation Rescue News Staff (Jun 10, 2013)

"Nova will be closing due to the dogged determination of a core of local activists who pursued every available opportunity—from prayer to public protest—to expose this heinous abortion mill and protect the public from its dangerous practices." –Troy Newman

http://www.breakingchristiannews.com/articles/display_art.html?ID=11755

editor@breakingchristiannews.com
><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>

GCF: If this was forwarded to you, please consider your own subscription to Good Clean Fun. It's free! Just send an email to: good-clean-fun-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: American Idol

My wife left me a note saying I should try out for "American Idle."

But the joke is on her because she spelled it wr--- hey, wait a minute!
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: New Boyfriend

The teenage girl brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. He has a baseball cap on backwards, torn low-rider jeans and numerous tattoos and body piercings.

The mother pulls her daughter aside. "Dear, you know your father and I love you and we only want the best for you. This boy, he just doesn't seem very ... nice."

"Oh please, Mom! If he wasn't nice, why would he be doing five hundred hours of community service?"
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Job Requirement

The personnel manager was impressing the applicant with the prospective job.

"We make parts for microscopes. You'll be required to work with lenses that are ten-thousandths of an inch thick."

"I can handle it," the applicant said, "I used to slice meat in a delicatessen."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Workaholic

As an attorney in a major law firm, I have many colleagues who work long hours. However, the reputation of one of my partners' workaholic ways even extended beyond the office. He not only had to leave work early one day because of a medical problem, but was also told by his doctor to stay home until the end of the week. My colleague grudgingly agreed to comply.

In the middle of the week, our receptionist received a call for him. She announced that the partner was out of the office until Friday.

"Good," the caller said. "That's all I wanted to know." It was the partner's doctor.
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: How Many Children?

I was blessed with three beautiful, intelligent and terrific children. When they were seven, six and five, my youngest daughter who was always asking questions, came home from kindergarten one day and asked, "Daddy, how many children did you want?"

Thinking for a minute, I looked at her and said, "Two."

She thought about this for a moment and then asked, "Me, and who else?"
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Delivery Suspicion

There was an unexpected knock on my door, and like I always do I first opened the peephole and asked, "Who's there?"

"Parcel Post, ma'am. I have a package that needs a signature."

"Where's the package?" I asked suspiciously. The deliveryman held it up.

"Could I see some ID?" I said, still not convinced.

"Lady," he replied wearily, "if I wanted to break into your house, I'd probably just use these." And he pulled out the keys I had left in the door.
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Better Living Through Chemistry

Table of Elements:
C = carbon
Ho = holmium
Co = cobalt
La = lanthanum
Te = tellurium

CHoCoLaTe - Better living through chemistry!
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Nasty Virus

One week of suffering through a nasty stomach virus left me wiped out. But I found a silver lining the very first day I could crawl out of bed.

Throwing on a pair of pants, I called out to my husband, "Look! These jeans fit, they finally fit!"

"Great," he said. "But those are mine."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: What's Wrong, Officer?

"What's wrong, Officer?"

I asked the cop those three dreaded words seconds after he'd pulled me over.

"Didn't you notice that you were driving the wrong way down a one-way street?" he asked.

"No" I said. "I'd turned on from Maple, which didn't have any signs indicating that this street was one-way."

"That's because you were going the wrong way down Maple too."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Black Friday Shopping

My wife got mad at me when I told her I was "NOT" going shopping with her at midnight on Black Friday. She went by herself, and she informed me in the morning that she had purchased eight new dresses.

"Eight dresses!" I hollered, "What could any woman want with eight new dresses?"

She calmly replied, "Eight new pairs of shoes."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Oregon Trail

On a family vacation one summer, we crossed Wyoming and noted several historical points of interest. The children were especially interested because they enjoyed the computer game "Oregon Trail," which gives players a taste of the hardships the pioneers endured.

We stopped at the famous South Pass to look at the wagon tracks still visible in the dirt.

Squinting out over the desolate, wind-swept landscape, my daughter nodded and said grimly, "This is where my oxen always die."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Soccer Carpool

For the second time in a row, I was forced to impose on the woman with whom I carpooled to our children's soccer practices. I phoned and explained that my husband had the car again, so I wouldn't be able to take my turn. A few minutes before she was due to pick up my son, my husband showed up.

Since it was too late for me to call and say I could drive after all, I asked my husband to hide the car in the garage and to stay inside. I also explained to my son that he shouldn't mention anything about his father's whereabouts.

Unfortunately, my husband forgot and was in front of our house chatting with a friend when my carpool partner arrived. When my son returned from practice, I asked him if she had noticed.

"Yes," he replied, "she asked me which of the two men in front of the house was my father. But don't worry. I told her I didn't know."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Heimlich Maneuver

During a CPR training class, we were paired up to practice the Heimlich Maneuver. The instructor set the scene by saying, "Imagine you're at a dinner party with your spouse and he or she starts choking."

He then reminded us not to do anything to people who were coughing, because they'd probably dislodge the obstruction on their own. We were to calm such victims with quiet talk and encourage them to continue coughing.

When the role playing began, one woman moved close to her coughing "husband." She placed a hand on his shoulder and whispered, "Honey, did you remember to mail your life insurance premium check last week?"
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Eating Habits

The mother had become very cholesterol-conscious and was trying to change the family's eating habits. They were now consuming lots of oat bran, and she had substituted turkey for most of the meats they used to enjoy. She used ground turkey in spaghetti sauce and she served turkey hot dogs.

The 18-year-old daughter was getting tired of all the turkey and cholesterol talk. One day she came home from school and asked the usual, "What's for dinner?"

"Chicken," the mom replied.

With a tired sigh she inquired, "Real chicken or turkey chicken?"
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Ice Capades

A mother's four-year-old daughter was attending her first performance of the Ice Capades. She was so mesmerized that she wouldn't budge from her seat even during intermission, watching the activity while the ice was cleaned.

At the end of the show, she exclaimed, "I know what I want to be when I grow up!"

The mother envisioned her on the ice in another 15 years, starring in the Ice Capades.

She was brought back to earth when the daughter continued, "I want to be a zamboni driver!"
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Birthday Cake

The mother was having difficulty gulping down the birthday cake her young son had made for her as a surprise.

When she was finished, he happily exclaimed, "I'm so glad you like it, Mommy. There should have been 32 candles on the cake, but they were all gone when I took it out of the oven."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Chain Necklace

When a thief snatched a chain necklace that a friend of mine was wearing, she grabbed at his collar, trying unsuccessfully to stop his getaway. Asked for the thief's description later, she said,"Don't bother looking for him. He only got a costume-jewelry chain of mine. But when I grabbed him by the collar, I got his chain, and it's real gold!"
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Need to Relax

Jill wanted to convince Susan, a continually harried friend, that she needed to find ways to relax. She invited her to dinner and, while she was busy cooking, Susan agreed to watch her old videotape on stress management and relaxation techniques.

Fifteen minutes later, she came into the kitchen and handed Jill the tape. "It was good," she said, "but I don't need it."

"But it's a 70-minute video," Jill replied. "You couldn't have watched the whole thing."

"Yes, I did," Susan assured her. "I put it on fast-forward."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Missing Purse

One Saturday night some friends came to our house to play cards. As they were driving away at the end of the evening, I discovered that one of the women had left her purse in a corner next to the dining-room hutch. I was about to call her house, intending to leave a message on the answering machine, when my son reminded me that they had a cell phone.

As I dialed the number, I marveled at the technology that would alert them before they had driven all the way home. A few seconds later the purse began to ring.
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Traffic Court

Recently in Traffic Court, a man who received an expensive parking ticket, testified that a uniformed Policeman had given his OK for the man to park there.

The Judge asked the man if he would recognize the Officer if he ever saw him again, and the man replied that he would.

The Judge then said, "Good. When you see the Officer again, tell him he owes you 257 dollars. Next..."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Tickets

A police officer friend of ours had stopped at the local cafe for coffee and was getting ready to leave when I spotted him.

"Go out and get'em!" I said. "I suppose everyone gets a ticket today?"

"I don't really give out many tickets," he said seriously.

"Oh come on," I teased, "you'd give your own mother a ticket."

"No, my mother never drove a car," he said, still serious.

Then a grin spread over his face. "I did catch her jaywalking once." he said, "and I issued her a warning. But that's all."
_ _______________________________ _

GCF: Diet Tips

My sisters and I have weight problems and are always sharing diet tips. One day my oldest sister was showing us a low-fat cookbook and pointed out a chicken dish she had tried the night before.

Reading the ingredients, I commented, "It looks like it would taste really bland."

"It did," she replied, "until I added cheese and sour cream."
_ _______________________________ _

/ )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( \
/ / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ \
_( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_
(((\ \>|_/ )_____________________________( \_||_/ )_____________________________( \_||_/ )_____________________________( \_||_/ )_____________________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_||_/ )___________________( \_|<> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
On the way back from a cub scout meeting, my grandson innocently said to my son, "Dad, I know babies come from mommies' tummies, but how do they get there in the first place?"

After my son hemmed and hawed a while, my grandson finally spoke up in disgust, "You don't have to make up something, Dad. It's okay if you don't know the answer."

Received from Penny Bartnicki.

(_:][:_)

Where's My Smith And Wesson

You may have heard on the news about a southern California man put under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100 guns and allegedly had (by rough estimate) 1-million rounds of ammunition stored in his home. The house also featured a secret escape tunnel.

My favorite quote from the dimwit television reporter: "Wow! He has about a million machine gun bullets." The headline referred to it as a "massive weapons cache."

By southern California standards someone even owning 100,000 rounds would be called "mentally unstable." Just imagine if he lived elsewhere:

In Arizona, he'd be called "an avid gun collector."

In Arkansas, he'd be called "a novice gun collector."

In Utah, he'd be called "moderately well prepared," but they'd probably reserve judgment until they made sure that he had a corresponding quantity of stored food.

In Montana, he'd be called "The neighborhood 'Go-To' guy."

In Idaho, he'd be called "a likely gubernatorial candidate."

In Wyoming, he'd be called "an eligible bachelor."

And, in Texas, he'd be called "a deer hunting buddy."

Received from dadiodio.

(_:][:_)

An older man, not in the best physical condition, asked the trainer in the gym, "I want to impress a beautiful young girl. Which machine should I use?"

The trainer replied, "Use the ATM machine outside!"

Received from george kotalis.

(_:][:_)

Which Came First?

A computer scientist, a surgeon, and a civil engineer were gathered at the pub. The surgeon boasts, "Surgery is the oldest technology in the world. It's in the Bible. God removed Adam's rib while he slept. This is clear evidence that surgery pre-dates all other technological endevors."

Without so much as a beat, the civil engineer says, "Before that, God formed the earth, the stars, and everything from nothing but chaos. He created rivers, mountians and oceans. This was clear evidence that civil engineering pre-dates all other technological endeavors."

No to be outdone, the computer scientist points out, "Yes, but where do you think the chaos came from?"

Received from ArcaMax Jokes.

(_:][:_)

The congregation of a small stone church decided that the stone which formed the step up to the front door had become too worn by its years of use, and would have to be replaced. As a sign of the faithfulness of members over the years, the stone had a pronounced dip in the middle, well-worn by parishioners entering and leaving the chapel.

Unfortunately, there were hardly any funds available for the replacement. Then someone came up with the bright idea that the replacement could be postponed for many years by simply turning the block of stone over.

They discovered that their great-grandparents had beaten them to it.

Received from Da Mouse Tracks.

(_:][:_)

My husband and I had just finished tucking our five young ones into bed one evening when we heard sobbing coming from three-year-old Billy's room. Rushing to his side, we found him crying hysterically. He had accidentally swallowed a penny and was sure he was going to die. No amount of talking could change his mind.

Desperate to calm him, my husband palmed a penny that he happened to have in his pocket and pretended to pull it from Billy's ear. Billy was delighted. In a flash, he snatched it from my husband's hand, swallowed it and demanded cheerfully, "Do it again, Dad!"

Received from Thomas Ellsworth.

(_:][:_)

Company B of the 11th Airborne Division stationed in Germany was sent on a two-day march. The weather was cold and rainy, and the roads soon turned to mud. The battalion commander, a colonel, marched with the troops, first with one group and then another.

On this moonless night, most of the men didn't recognize the colonel with his rain gear on and military insignia covered up. One miserable private leaned toward him and said, "Can you believe some idiots actually make a career out of this?"

From Reader's Digest, "Humor in Uniform"

Received from Ed.

(_:][:_)

Ann Landers challenged her readers to come up with the world's third biggest lie -- right after "The check is in the mail" and "I'm from the government, and I'm here to help you." Here is a sampling from the thousands she received:

- "It's a good thing you came in today. We only have two more in stock."

- "Five pounds is nothing on a person of your height."

- "You made it yourself? I never would have guessed."

- "You don't look a day over 40."

- "Dad, I need to move out of the dorm into an apartment of my own so I can have some peace and quiet when I study."

- "It's delicious, but I can't eat another bite."

- "The new ownership won't affect you. The company will remain the same."

- "The puppy won't be any trouble, Mom. I promise I'll take care of it myself."

- "Your hair looks just fine."

- "Put away the map. I know exactly how to get there."

- "You don't need it in writing. You have my personal guarantee."

Received from Ed.

(_:][:_)

A woman went into a hardware store to purchase a bale of peat moss.

She gave a personal check in payment and said to the clerk, "I suppose you will want some identification."

He replied, without hesitation, "No ma'am, that won't be necessary."

"How come?" asked the woman.

"Crooks don't buy peat moss," answered the clerk.

(_:][:_)

A friend was lecturing in Latin America. He was going to use a translator, but to identify with his audience, he wanted to begin his talk by saying in Spanish, "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen." He arrived at the auditorium a little early and realized he did not know the Spanish words for ladies and gentlemen. Being rather resourceful, he went to the part of the building where the restrooms were, looked at the signs on the two doors, and memorized those two words.

When the audience arrived and he was introduced, he stood up and said in Spanish, "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen."

The audience was shocked. He didn't know whether he had offended them or perhaps they hadn't heard him or understood him. So he decided to repeat it. Again in Spanish he said, "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen."

One person in the audience began to snicker. Pretty soon the entire audience was laughing. Finally, someone told him that he had said, "Good evening, bathrooms and broom closets!"

Received from Clean Laffs.

(_:][:_)

After spending 3-1/2 hours enduring the long lines, surly clerks and insane regulations at the Department of Motor Vehicles, I stopped at a toy store to pick up a gift for my son.

I brought my selection - a baseball bat - to the cash register.

"Cash or charge?" the clerk asked.

"Cash," I snapped. Then apologizing for my rudeness, I explained, "I've spent the afternoon at the motor-vehicle bureau."

"Shall I giftwrap the bat?" the clerk asked sweetly. "Or are you going back there?"

Received from Thomas Ellsworth.

(_:][:_)
--
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Column - -
http://www.madkane.com/humor_blog/

Facebook Faces The Hashtag Music

June 14th, 2013

Facebook Faces The #Hashtag Music (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Facebook honchos have fin’ly said “yes”
To #hashtags, but under duress:
All the cool kids at Twitter
Treat hashtags like glitter,
A trend Facebook dares not transgress.

#Facebookhashtag #Facebookhashtags #hashtagsfacebook #hashtagfacebook

© Madeleine Begun Kane. All Rights Reserved.
http://www.madkane.com/
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Once upon a time a powerful Emperor of the Rising Sun advertised for a new Chief Samurai.

After a year, only three applied for the job:
A Japanese,
A Chinese, and
A Jewish Samurai.

"Demonstrate your skills!" commanded the Emperor.

The Japanese samurai stepped forward, opened a tiny box and released a fly. He drew his samurai sword and *Swish!* the fly fell to the floor, neatly divided in two!

"What a feat!" said the Emperor. “Number Two Samurai, show me what you do."

The Chinese samurai smiled confidently, stepped forward and opened a tiny box, releasing a fly. He drew his samurai sword and * Swish! * Swish! * The fly fell to the floor neatly quartered.

"That is skill!" nodded the Emperor. "How are you going to top that, Number three Samurai?"

The Jewish samurai, Obi-wan Cohen, stepped forward and opened a tiny box releasing one fly, drew his samurai sword and *Swoooooosh! * flourished his sword so mightily that a gust of wind blew through the room. But the fly was still buzzing around!

In disappointment, the Emperor said, "What kind of skill is that? The fly isn't even dead."

"Dead?" replied the Jewish Samurai... "Dead is easy. Circumcision... Now THAT takes skill!"
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"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." __ Franklin D. Roosevelt
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. _ _ George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" _ _ Queen E. Watson
“A political class of Republicans and Democrats that look after themselves, not the Nation. A media hostile to the very precepts of this nation. A generation of Americans who see morals as vices, and are ignorant of America's Actual History.”
"The things that will destroy America are prosperity-at-any-price, peace-at-any-price, safety-first instead of duty-first, the love of soft living, and the get-rich-quick theory of life." - - Theodore Roosevelt
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(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234_5655
(Non _ Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance _ 234_7371 (24 Hour)
Jail _ 234_5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control _ 800_222_1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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Interested in getting in touch with the Banner_News through e_mail? editor@bannernews.net For the editor, news@bannernews.net For news and sports items, Coming Events, Diary, Church News, school and civic events. [http://www.bannernews.net/]
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"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." __ "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" __ "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." __ "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." _ _ "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." _ _ Paul Troquille
“Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est.” Knowledge is power. _ Francis Bacon
"The problem is here and now. The time for talk is past. The time for action is now."
Comments on the first Earth Day _ James F. McClellan via John "Fuzzy" Thurman
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" __"Bug"
God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT_I KC5HII

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